


The Luckiest Girl

by jinskookiemonster



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), EXO (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst?, Bullying, F/M, Fluffiest of Fluffs, Reader-centric, Reverse Harem, blackpink exo and red velvet are just supporting characters, highschool!au, i dont know what happened at the end though, is this how you do tags?, it became a textau at the end?, it's like literally going to a kpop highschool, lol im enjoying this, okay sure it is a love story if you squint enough, other kpop artists were mentioned as well, slowburn, spare me, this is my first BTS fanfic, this is not a love story tbh lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-03-24 23:57:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 56,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13822161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jinskookiemonster/pseuds/jinskookiemonster
Summary: Nica, who went to an all-girl school since elementary, transferred to her older brothers' co-ed high school. Along the way, she meets and befriends 5 other cute, dorky boys. All of the girls in this school seem to go gaga over them, but Nica seems to be the ONLY girl who gets to catch their attention.Being lucky sure is great, but it comes with consequences.





	1. First Day

**Author's Note:**

> Heads up if you're reading this fic:
> 
> 1\. Thank you for reading this fic. LOL  
> 2\. Nica is NOT me, Nica is NOT a specific person. NICA is YOU. I just decided to give YOU a name 'cause this fic is told by first-person point-of-view.  
> 3\. I swear I DON'T know who NICA is going to end up with. I'll figure it out as I write the story.  
> 4\. I made Jungkook the same age as Jimin, Taehyung, and Nica so they could be classmates.  
> 5\. This is a HIGHSCHOOL AU, so I made them all cutesy and immature and well... highschool-y (no offense to my younger readers... you know what I mean right?)  
> 6\. Again, Thank you.

" _Ya_ , Nica. Wake up."

A cold voice is whispering into my ear.  _Ugh, it's **Yoongi** -oppa waking me up again!_

He's sitting at the foot of my bed, pulling my blanket, "You're gonna be late for school, dummy. It's your first day. Mom said we should go together 'cause you might get lost."

I turned my back on him, "I'd rather go to school with  **Namjoon** -oppa. You always leave me behind when we walk together anyway."

He snorted then pinched my cheek, "It's not my fault that you're such a slow walker!"

I didn't respond.

"Nicaaaaa! C'mon!" he pulled my arm up.

"I don't want to!" I shouted.

He stood up, "Okay fine. I'm leaving then. Too bad, I bet  **Jin** will come with me to school today. I wonder if he's on his way here?"

 

My eyes widened.  _Omo_ , Jin-oppa??

_Jin-oppa is my Yoongi-oppa's best friend_

_and..._

_my long-time crush._

 

Long-time, meaning, since forever. Ever since I knew,  _or maybe even before that_ , what the word "crush" meant. 

 

I know.  _It's pathetic._

 

"Fine! I'll walk with you! Not because of Jin-oppa but because I don't want you to think that I love Namjoon-oppa more than you." I explained.

He messed up my hair, crouched in front of me, and said, "Really? Is it really because of me?"

I blushed, "Shut up!"

He laughed and walked away.

 

I'm gonna see Jin-oppa today.  _YEEEEEEEEEES!!!_

 

So I got out of my bed, took a bath, brushed my teeth, wore my new high school uniform, fixed my hair, put on some powder and lip gloss (I shouldn't have, but I'm seeing Jin-oppa today so I need to look like a girl,  _atleast_ ), and went downstairs to eat breakfast. 

My two older brothers were already eating when I came to the dining table.

Namjoon-oppa greeted me with a smile, "Good morning, Nica! Ready for your first day?"

"No, not really." I answered.

He cheered me up, "It'll be fine. Yoongi-hyung and I will be there for you. You can come to us anytime."

I smiled, "Thank you, Oppa."

 

Mom joined us for breakfast, "Eat up, children. You're gonna be late for school. Yoongi-ah, Namjoon-ah, take care of Nica, okay? Your school has more boys than girls 'cause it just turned co-ed not long ago. I don't want her to get bullied. Protect her at all times."

"Yes,  _Eomma_." Yoongi-oppa answered while busily eating his pancake.

"We got her, Eomma. Don't worry." Namjoon-oppa said.

 

Then the doorbell rang.

 

"I think it's Jin. We better get going. Bye, Eomma." said Yoongi-oppa. He took another sip of hot chocolate and stood up.

My heart skipped a beat. I quickly ate another bite of pancake and grabbed my bag, "Bye, Eomma!"

Namjoon-oppa stood so quickly that he managed to spill his hot chocolate on the table. "Sorry, Eomma! Got to go!"

Mom shook her head, "Be careful, Namjoon!"

 

 

When Yoongi-oppa opened the door, I saw Jin-oppa's wide shoulders, not his face as my eldest brother is blocking my view.

 

~~_I.can't.breathe._ ~~

 

Finally, Yoongi-oppa moved out of the way and suddenly my heart started jumping up and down like it's on a trampoline. Jin-oppa smiled at us, "Good morning!  _Kaja_?"

 

 

Jin and Yoongi-oppa were walking ahead of us while Namjoon-oppa and I were walking together. Our school's just a few blocks away from our house so it's way easier to just walk.

Namjoon-oppa's listening to some kind of underground rap music so he can't seem to notice that I'm blushing while staring at Jin-oppa's back.

 

_My face is really burning! He is so freaking handsome!_

 

When we entered the school, Jin-oppa suddenly glanced at me and so I looked away like a complete idiot.  _Way to go, Nica._

 

"I'm sure you're gonna love it here, Nica. The food in the cafeteria is so good!" he said.

I just smiled.

Yoongi-oppa snickered, "You're just saying that because you eat practically everything."

"That's true. Anyway, I can show you where the cafeteria is, Nica. I know the menu inside and out so I can help you choose which food to eat for lunch." Jin-oppa answered.

 

Lunch? Cafeteria? Me and him? Does that count as a date?  _Omo._

 

" _Ya_ , what are you doing? Are you gonna turn my baby sister into a pig like you?" Suga-oppa said.

I scowled, "Oppa, don't call me baby sister."

"Well, technically, you are our baby sister, Nica. And you will always be." Namjoon-oppa said.

 

They walked me to my homeroom. It was located to the far right building in front of the soccer field.

 

"Be good, Nica." Namjoon-oppa said.

"It's not like you're sending me off kindergarten, oppa. I'll be fine." I said.

"Just call me when you need me and I'll come running," Yoongi-oppa said.

I chuckled, "You don't run at all, Oppa. Don't kid yourself."

"Well, you know what I mean." he said.

Jin-oppa held my head, "I'll bring you treats after school."

I blushed, "Uhh.. you don't need to. But thank you."

 

Then they left.

 

"Nica, you can do this. You got this.  _Fighting_!" I whispered to myself as I entered the homeroom.

 

The room was filled with so much noise, mostly boys' voices.

Some were running, others were sleeping, most of them were talking about computer games or sports.

 

I sat on the desk at the back since no one was there. So far, I only see 6 girls, including me, in this room. Most are boys.

 

Suddenly a boy with a charming smile came to me and shouted, "Hello!"

I smiled shyly as I don't know what to do. I was always surrounded with girls (I came from an all-girls' school), so talking to boy classmates is not exactly my forte.

"My name is  **Jimin**. What's your name?" he said.

 _This boy sure is cute!_  "Uhm... Nica."

"Nica... That's a cute name. I saw you came with  _ **Suga**_ -hyung. Are you his sister?"

I raised my eyebrow, "Suga-hyung?"

Jimin blinked, "The guy with the sleepy eyes? Who looks like he's so done with life? You came with him right?"

I laughed, "Yoongi-oppa? He's my oldest brother. How do you know him? And why do you call him Suga?"

He was surprised by my answer, "Oh, he didn't tell you? Everyone who knows him in this school calls him Suga. That's his school nickname. I think it's something to do with his position with the varsity basketball team 'cause he's the shooting guard."

 

Shooting guard.

Shoo.. gua..

Suga??

 

"Oh, I get it now!" I answered.

Jimin laughed at me. His eye smile just made my day. He's like a little ball of sunshine, "I watch their team practice after school everyday since 5th grade so I know him. I didn't know he has a really pretty sister."

I smiled even more, " _Ya_ , you're making me blush. Stop that."

He placed his bag on the desk beside mine and sat beside me, "I'm just making you smile. I noticed how nervous you were when you came in. Well, all girls are. I can't blame you since there are more boys in this school than girls."

 

Our conversation was cut off when someone shouted, " **Taehyung** -ah!!!! STOOOOP!!"

 

I asked Jimin, "Who's Taehyung?"

He pointed at a tall skinny boy who was laughing,  _like literally_ , on the floor, "That's him. We're in the same class since 1st grade so we're really close. He's a funny guy. He gets along with almost everybody... well, except girls. Girls find him mysterious. I think he's just a weirdo."

 

I looked at _Taehyung_.

He has this beautiful face and his laugh will most likely cure any illness there is.

 

_Oh, my heart. My poor heart._

 

Jimin added, "He's usually like that when he's with friends, but he can be so quiet sometimes."

I got lost in Jimin's eyes that I even forgot what he was talking about.

 

 _Nica, get your stuff together._ Classes are not even starting and you already have two crushes!! What is wrong with you?  _ **You are betraying Jin-oppa!**_

 

Then, Jimin started talking to someone on my other side, "Oh, hi."

I turned and there was another cute boy sitting beside me.

 

_Oh my Gosh._

**What is up with this school?**

CUTE GUYS EVERYWHERE!!!

 

I admit, so far, this boy is the cutest.

 

The boy just smiled at him.

Jimin continued talking, "What's your name? I've never seen you before, are you a transferee?"

"Yes. We moved in a couple of weeks ago. I'm Jungkook." he answered.

I was in between them so it would be awkward not to say anything so I said, "Hi, I'm Nica. This is Jimin. Nice to meet you."

 

The teacher then came in so the class started. Since it's our first day, our classes were shortened. We were done around noon.

 

I was on my way to the cafeteria when Jimin ran towards me, "Where are you going?"

"To the cafeteria. I'm really hungry." I answered.

"Let me come with you. Do you know where to go? There's a short cut." he said, smiling at me again. _Ayo,_ this boy. Really.  _He's gonna make me faint anytime soon._

"Sure." I said.

"Wait here." he said then he ran away.

 

When he came back, Taehyung's with him.

 

Jimin introduced me, "Taehyung, this is Nica. Nica... Taehyung."

"Hi...  **V**." Taehyung said.

"V? No, I'm Nica." I said, baffled.

Jimin hit Taehyung's head, "You are confusing her already. Talk normal, TaeTae."

Taehyung then looked me in the eye and smiled, "I'm Taehyung, but you can call me V."

"I still call him Taehyung just because," Jimin said. He then whispered in my ear, "He introduces himself as V to strangers like you 'cause he thinks that's a really cool nickname. Don't worry, he'll let you call him Taehyung when you get to know him."

Jimin winked at me. I giggled and nodded.

 

When we arrived at the cafeteria, there was a long line of students waiting to order so we decided to look for a place to sit first. Luckily, we found a long table.

 

"How are you liking our school so far? Is it the same with your previous school?" Jimin asked.

I shook my head, "I came from an all-girl school, so this is all new to me."

Jimin and V looked at each other then looked at me and both said, in chorus, " _Chincha_?"

I nodded, "I don't really have any guy friends because of that, so I'm really glad that you are all friendly to me. Especially you, Jimin. Thank you."

Jimin's eyes vanished again because of his smile, "Oh, it's nothing."

 

Jungkook passed by our table, looking all lost and confused. V called him, "Hey!"

"He has a name, dummy." Jimin said.

"I know he has a name. I just don't know what it is." V replied.

Jungkook came to us. Jimin asked, "Are you looking for a place to eat? You can eat with us if you like. There's plenty of room in here."

"The cafeteria is usually full at lunchtime since we all take breaks at the same time." V added.

"Is it okay?" Jungkook asked.

"Absolutely." Jimin said.

 

Jungkook then sat beside me. _He smells so nice. I can't even._

 

_I can't believe that I'm surrounded by these cute boys! How do I even keep my cool?_

 

 

Then, my brothers came, looking all cool and stuff (tbh, they still look like dorks to me. But whatever). I think they're trying to intimidate my new friends.

"So I see you gained three friends today." Yoongi-oppa said.

"Yes, I did. I think you know Jimin already. This is Taehyung... I mean,  _V_  and Jungkook. Guys, meet my oldest brother,  ** _Suga-oppa_**." I said, teasing him.

Yoongi-oppa was flustered, " _Ya_! Where did you get--- Jimin! You told her?!" 

Jimin laughed.

"Please be good to my sister. Don't play jokes on her, or else." Namjoon-oppa threatened them.

V jokingly replied, " **Rapmon** -hyung, don't you worry. Nica is safe with us."

Namjoon-oppa pinched V's ear, "KIM TAEHYUNG!!!"

"Rapmon? Did you just call him Rapmon?!" Yoongi-oppa said.

V then said, "I'm not allowed to say anything. He'll kill me for sure."

 

 

Two other higher class students then came to our table.

_Omo, one of them is Jin-oppa!_

I'm not sure who the other guy is. I think it's Namjoon-oppa's classmate.

 

"I can't find any other tables, Mon." the guy said to Namjoon-oppa.

"Why are you calling him Mon? Is it from Rapmon?" Yoongi-oppa asked again.

"Same reason people are calling you Suga, hyung." Namjoon-oppa answered.

"Are you into basketball too?" Suga-oppa asked.

"Drop it!" Namjoon-oppa said.

Jin-oppa laughed, "Your  _dongsaeng_ 's keeping secrets now, Yoongi!"

Namjoon-oppa then said, "Whatever. Anyway, can we join you guys? There are no tables left and we are all starving to death here."

 

My classmates all looked at me in fear, but then agreed.

"You are scaring my friends away, you guys. They can't even say no to you." I said.

"Well, too bad." Yoongi-oppa said, acting out his "SWAG" again.

 

 

Namjoon-oppa finally introduced his classmate to us, "Oh, by the way, this is Hoseok, my best friend."

Hoseok-oppa then stood ON one of the chairs and made weird, funny noises, "Nice to meet you, I'm Hoseok! But you can call me Hobi too. I bring hope and joy to everyone!"

We all laughed at him.

"I apologize for his behavior. He's really like that. I'm not really sure why I'm friends with him." Namjoon-oppa said.

"It's okay. That's how I feel everytime I'm with Taehyung. I can totally relate, Hyung." Jimin said.

V and Hoseok-oppa both gave sharp looks to Jimin and Namjoon-oppa.

 

Hoseok-oppa sat down properly and looked at me, "And you're Nica right? Namjoon's younger sister?"

"Yes." I answered.

"She's really cute, right?" Jin-oppa said.

 

_Omo._

Jin-oppa thinks I'm cute! This is the best day ever.

 

"She is cute! She doesn't look like you guys! Especially you, Namjoon. Thank Goodness you're not a girl, or you'll be really ugly!" Hoseok-oppa said.

 

Everyone at the table laughed... except for Namjoon-oppa.

 

Namjoon-oppa grabbed Hoseok-oppa's collar, "I'm gonna kill you."

 

I think I like Hoseok-oppa already. Well,  _not in the same way that I like Jin-oppa_ , but he's really fun to be with! Like Jimin, his smile makes me happy.

He has these adorable dimples too.

 

 

_My heart is really full today. I'd never imagine that I'll get to encounter and befriend so many boys. I always thought teenage boys are stupid, but I guess I'm wrong. They're fun to be with, too._

This is really fascinating for me since I came from an all-girl school, like I've said earlier. I can't even process it all at once.

 

While we were busy chatting at our table, I heard some girls whispering while walking by us, and I recognized their faces -- they are our classmates!

One girl said, "Wow, look at that new girl! She's surrounded by these cute boys!"

The other girl then said, "They are all good-looking and they seem fun to be with too! Isn't she lucky?"

 

When I heard that, I suddenly glanced at the guys that I'm with.

 

 

_**Am I really lucky?** _

**Why? How?**

 

_**\-----** _

 


	2. We Got You

Two weeks passed by rather quickly, and I eventually got used to my new school. I still hang out with Jungkook, V, and Jimin and we always meet with my brothers, Jin-oppa and Hoseok-oppa at the cafeteria every lunch break.

These guys made everything easier. I was so scared of this whole transferring to a new almost all-boys school, but they reassured me that I have nothing to worry about. 

 

But...

 

 _I wanna be friends with my girl classmates too!_ I'm the only girl in our group so there are times that I miss talking about crushes, make up, dresses, that new BTS album ( _do you know BTS? They are my favorite boy band!_ ), and other topics that I can ONLY talk about with girls.

These guys talk about comics, computer games, sports and hip hop music all day long. **_Ugh._**

 

I tried talking to my girl classmates, but they always throw dirty looks at me everytime I come near them. I'm really not sure why.

 

_Did I do something wrong? Is this really how they treat newbies? If so, why do Jimin, Jungkook & V seem to be so nice to me?_

 

 

I was deep into thinking about this that I spaced out. Yoongi-oppa nudged my elbow, "Nica, aren't you gonna eat your food? Jin-hyung will snatch it from you if you keep on daydreaming."

Jin-oppa looked at me, " _Gwaenchanha_?"

I blushed so I looked down to avoid his gaze.

V touched my forehead, "You don't have any fever, I guess."

Namjoon-oppa grabbed my spoon, "Do you want me to feed you?"

Hoseok-oppa stood up, "Do you want me to order you another food?"

I didn't respond.

I looked at the table beside us, where my girl classmates were seating. They were staring at me while whispering to each other.

Jungkook then said, "Are they bothering you, Nica?"

I looked at him, all shocked, " _Anya_. It's nothing."

Yoongi-oppa said, "Are the girls in your class bullying you? Jimin, I told you to protect her---"

I cut him off, "Oppa, I'm fine..." I let out a heavy sigh,  "...I just feel like the girls in my class hate me for some reason. They don't want to talk to me or even be near me."

Jimin was about to go talk to them but I stopped him. He said, "They're making you uncomfortable! That's not nice."

I replied, "It's okay. I'm just gonna confront them myself."

 

 

And so I did.

Right after our gym class, I spoke to the girls (there were 4 of us in the whole class, including me) while we were in our locker room [Girls are separated from boys so we had some privacy].

I gathered all the strength inside me and finally asked them, "Is something wrong? Did I do anything to you guys?"

One girl responded (Her name's Irene), "I don't know. Did you?"

"It's not that long since we started school, why do you hate me so much as if I stole something from you?"

Another girl, Seulgi, said, "Because you did steal from us!"

" _BWO_?!" _I don't know what she's talking about._ "My mom taught me well, I would never steal from anyone!"

The 3rd girl, Sooyoung, chuckled, "You stole Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook from us!"

 

 

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL F----

 

 

I was mortified. My mouth was open for a good 30 seconds because I can't find the right words to say.

THESE GIRLS ARE SO IMMATURE! 

Me?

Stealing guys?

 

"I don't know what you did, but maybe you seduced them. That's why they all want to be with you... even Jungkook! You're always with them! It's so irritating! You follow them whenever they go, you even sit beside Jimin and Jungkook!"

I tried to explain, "Well, our seat plan was decided on the first day. I didn't--"

But Irene cut me off, "Shut up. Just admit it, Nica. You're a flirt."

 

Then they stormed off.

They left me hanging there, like a total loser.

 

I can't believe this. Two weeks into junior high and I'm already called a ~~flirt.~~

 

 

I suddenly heard someone calling my name from outside. It's a cute voice so I'm sure it's Jimin, "NICAAAAAAA! Aren't you done?"

Then I heard Jungkook whispered, "She's a girl, Jimin. Of course she takes time to change."

V then said, "Should we wait for her right there? We look like maniacs here. _Seonsaeng_ might think we're peeping."

Jimin replied to him, "How is she gonna find out----"

Jungkook cut him out, "SSHHH! I think she's crying?!"

 

Jungkook went inside our change rooms. His eyes widened when he saw me crying. "What happened, Nica?"

Jimin and V followed him. When I saw their faces, I started bawling.

 

They panicked. _Apparently, they're not used to seeing a girl cry._

Jungkook started pacing back and forth, Jimin covered his eyes so he couldn't see me, and V just stared at me, teary-eyed.

 

Finally, I stopped crying and said, "I'm sorry. I just--- I'm sorry."

"Is something wrong?" asked Jimin.

"Are you on your period?" asked V.

Jungkook hit him, " _Ya_!"

V then explained, "I just thought maybe that's the reason why she was crying all of a sudden!"

 

 

I said, in between hiccups, "Why are you so nice to me?"

All three of them stared at me blankly, like I was asking them an Algebra question.

"I'm a girl. Boys shouldn't be this comfortable around girls right? Atleast in our age. How come you're not uneasy with me? Especially you, Jungkook. You are terrified of girls, except me." I added.

 

They couldn't answer me.

 

Then Jimin said, "Because you're cute? In everything you do?"

V added, "I don't feel awkward when I'm with you."

Jungkook said, "Because you're genuine. Other girls flirt with me, and it makes me uncomfortable. You don't do that. You stay true to what and who you are."

 

V and Jimin looked at him.

Jimin stroked his hair, " _Aigoo_ , our Kookie is deep!"

Jungkook blushed so he hit them both.

V then gave me his handkerchief, "Is this something about our girl classmates? Did you talk to them?"

I nodded.

"Are they like that because of us?" Jimin asked.

I nodded again.

 

All three let out a heavy sigh.

 

"I don't get it." Jungkook said.

"I think it's a girl thing." V replied.

"Should we talk to them then?" Jimin asked.

 

All three stood up, ready to leave the room.

 

"We'll be right back, Nica." said Jimin.

I stopped them, "Wait! Where are you going?!"

V replied, "We'll talk to the girls, I guess?"

Jungkook said, "Actually, YOU two will talk to them. I'll just stand next to you and nod occasionally."

Jimin and V scowled at him.

"Hey, you don't have to do that. I'm fine." I said.

"Are you sure?" V asked.

I nodded, "Just wait for me at the gym. I'll go change. You better leave before _Seonsaeng_ catches you in here. _Ppali._ "

 

They left.

I cried some more after that, as I really don't get why they'd hate me for hanging out with those 3.

I've never had any guy friends so I don't know how to flirt, and it's not like I'm forcing them to be friends with me. 

_I don't understand._

_I just want to get along with everyone._

 

 

\------

After school, V, Jimin and Jungkook walked with me to the school gate. This is where we usually part ways when going home as we all go to different directions.

Then, I suddenly remembered something.

I froze, "Omo. I forgot something!" _I forgot my gym clothes at the change room!_

"What is it now?" Jimin asked.

"You scared me." V said.

"I forgot something!" I repeated myself. I started running, "You can go without me. I just need to get something at the change room."

"Nica, wait!" Jimin shouted.

 

 

When I came to the change rooms, I saw my girl classmates.

One girl was holding my clothes, Wendy. She wasn't at the changing room earlier.

I laid out my arms to her, reaching for my clothes, "Thank you. I forgot to get them."

Seulgi pushed me, "We are not your friends. Don't act like we are."

Sooyoung showed me a pair of scissors. She smiled, "Well, since you're a flirt, why not make your clothes reveal your true self?"

"Are you freaking kidding me?! You're gonna rip my clothes apart?!" I said.

Irene then grabbed the scissors and pointed it to my jogging pants, "We can make really short shorts for you, if you like. That way you can get whoever guy you like."

Wendy then said, "Jimin would love seeing your legs, I bet."

 

_Aish, these crazy ** ~~bitches.~~**_

 

Seulgi added, "We could cut her gym shirt too! Make it into a tube top or something."

The other three nodded.

"Bring my clothes back please." I asked, trying so hard to be calm.

Irene threw a nasty look at me, "No."

 

 

Surprisingly, we heard a bang on the door.

 

"Who's that?" Seulgi asked, looking terrified all of a sudden.

 

Then we heard voices.

_"YA, YOU COULD BREAK THE DOOR!"_

_"Sssh."_

_"But it's too---"_

_"Ssssh!"_

 

The 4 girls' face turned red.

_Who's listening to us all this time?_

 

Seeing them distracted, I grabbed the opportunity and snatched my clothes from Irene's hands.

Since there were 4 of them, they managed to get it again and even pushed me to the floor.

 

"You're really immature! How on Earth would I be stealing V, Jimin and Jungkook from you?! We are all friends. It's not my problem if they find you uncomfortable to be with. Or maybe it's because they don't see me as a girl at all!" I explained.

 

They all looked at each other. _My explanation may have made sense to them, I guess?_

 

Irene tossed the gym clothes to my face, "Whatever. Let's go, girls. This is useless."

 

They ran towards the door.

When they opened it, Jin-oppa, Yoongi-oppa, Namjoon-oppa, Hoseok-oppa, Jimin, V and Jungkook's faces popped in.

 

The girls were embarrassed. _Apparently, these guys were eavesdropping the whole time!_

 

Jin-oppa then said, "You know, bullying's not nice."

My brothers didn't say anything; Yoongi-oppa just pouted his lips and Namjoon-oppa shook his head.

Hoseok-oppa said, "Please don't hate our Nica just because we adore her."

 

The girls looked at V, Jimin and Jungkook.

Wendy said, "We just don't get why you love hanging out with her but when it's with us, you're all awkward and weird."

Jimin, V and Jungkook shrugged their shoulders.

Jimin then smirked and said, "The only thing we know is this -- bullying her won't stop us from hanging out with her, BUT it will definitely give us more reasons NOT to hang out with you."

 

The girls frowned and marched away, throwing tantrums into the air.

 

"Are you okay?" Yoongi-oppa asked.

I nodded. I picked up my gym clothes and closed the door to the change room.

 

Did they hear everything?

_Aish, I'm so embarrassed right now!_

 

"Are you really, as in really okay?" Namjoon-oppa asked again.

"We could buy ice cream if you like. Ice cream makes everything better." Jimin said.

"No. Jjajjangmyeon makes everything better. We could eat jjajjang!" Jungkook argued.

V hit his head.

"I'm sorry if we eavesdropped earlier. We didn't mean to. We met with Jimin, V, and Jungkook at the gate and they said you were here. We were just waiting for youso we could all go home together, but then we heard you screaming." Jin-oppa explained.

"I was literally holding Yoongi-hyung's arms. He was so ready to barge in." said Hoseok-oppa.

"No one can bully my baby sister. They should be thankful I don't hit girls. I still respect them even though they're mean to you." Yoongi-oppa said coldly, trying hard not to be sweet.

I looked at Yoongi-oppa and smiled at him.

"I just want to have some girl friends, too." I sighed, "But I guess I'm stuck with you guys." I replied.

"Ya, why do you sound so upset?" Hoseok-oppa asked, with a big smile on his face.

"We are so fun to be with! What more could you ask for?" Jin-oppa said.

 

I blushed. _Aish, Nica._

Keep calm. 

 

"Well... to be honest, you're all dorks." I said jokingly.

 

They all turned to me, shocked.

 

_I think I should run for my life now._

 

 

I started running. They all followed me.

I shouted, "I'm just joking!" as I was giggling while running.

Namjoon-oppa caught me then he single-handedly carried me on his shoulder, like he was kidnapping me or something.

 

"OPPAAAAA! YA! PUT ME DOWN!" I said, while hitting his back.

The other six just laughed while Namjoon-oppa twirled me around, making me dizzy.

" _HAJIMA_! IT'S MAKING ME DIZZY!" I shouted, in between giggles.

 

Namjoon-oppa put me down on a bench near the school gate. The boys hovered around me.

V pinched my cheeks, "You're so cute."

When I regained my consciousness, I ran towards Namjoon-oppa and kicked him as hard as I could.

"Do you feel better now?" Jungkook asked.

"I do. I guess being twirled around helped a lot, but I still want ice cream." I replied.

"There's an ice cream shop two blocks from here." Jin-oppa said.

"Let's go then!" Hoseok-oppa said, dancing while half-running and half-walking.

 

 

 

On the way to the ice cream shop, Jungkook and I got a chance to chat since we were walking together. The others decided to have a race; the first one to get to the shop wins of course.

 

"Don't you wanna join them? I know you love winning." I said.

He smiled, "I don't wanna sweat it. I'm gonna win anyways. It's fine."

I chuckled, "Wow. Such self-confidence."

He laughed then scratched his head, "I just want to say sorry. It's partly our fault why those girls were mean to you. Especially me, since I'm always aloof near them. I just... I don't know how to interact with girls. I came from an all-boys school in Busan and I don't have a sister either. You're my first girl friend."

 

My heart skipped a beat.

I know he means **_girl friend_** , not girlfriend... but...

 

_ERASE ERASE._

**_My heart belongs to Jin-oppa._ **

 

 

I smiled, "You don't have to be sorry. It's fine."

"You were brave for standing up to those girls. I can't imagine how I'm gonna handle it if I were you." he said.

"Thank you." I replied.

 

He smiled widely. His prominent two front teeth make him so much cuter. Like a bunny.

 

"Oh, I forgot to tell you something." he said.

"What is it?" I asked.

He blushed, "I'm friends with you not because I don't see you as a girl..."

 

He started walking faster. Then he turned his back on me and said,  **"I am very aware that you are a girl, Nica."**

 

He started running after that, "If you beat me to the ice cream shop, I'll buy you anything you want!"

I shouted, "Hey, wait up!"

 

 

_What does Jungkook mean by that?_

_And why does my heart keep on beating so fast right now?_


	3. Group Study

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BTS having a group study at your house AU

 

"I am very aware that you are a girl, Nica."

 

 

I...

AM...

VERY AWARE...

THAT...

YOU ARE...

A...

 

 

**GIRL.**

 

 

 

Am I just overthinking this? Is there any more meaning in between those lines?

I don't know!!!

Why can't I get it off my mind?

Why did Jungkook have to say that?

 

Well, maybe he was just trying to make me feel better that day...

Right?!

_Goodness, I've been overthinking this for weeks now. This is bad._

 

 

I was so deep into my thoughts that I didn't notice Jimin was right beside me.

He screamed on my ear, "NICAAAAAA!" then put his arm around my shoulder.

I jumped, "JIMIN! Why would you do that!! You scared me to death!"

 

Jimin pinched my cheek, "Why do you look so worried?" Then his face lightened up, "Aish, I know why! Jungkook told me!"

I turned red, "He told you?! What did he tell you?"

 

_Have they been talking about me behind my back?!!_

 

Jimin's eyes disappeared again because of his wide smile, "You're worried about our exams!"

 

Oh.

_**Exams.** _

Right.

Just like that, our first quarterly exams are up. _Time flies._

 

 

I nodded, "Ah, yes. Exams. Right, I was worried about our exams."

Suddenly, Jimin shouted, "AWWWW!"

Apparently, V hit his back, causing him to shout in pain. These boys are really violent to each other. I think that's how they express their affection.

V said, "Why are you so clingy with Nica?! Nica, was he harrassing you?!"

I replied, " _Anya_ , it's okay."

V then turned to lecture Jimin, "Jimin-ie, what did we talk about the other day? We should start treating Nica as a girl because she IS a girl."

 

_So, they were really talking about me?! Behind my back?!_

 

"I was just trying to cheer her up. There's no malice in putting my arm around her shoulder. Right, Nica?! We're cool, right?!" Jimin said.

"What are you talking about, V?! You guys were talking about me?" I asked.

" _Eobseo._ It's nothing. Suga-hyung just told us to treat you better since you're having a hard time." V explained.

 

Weeks have passed since the change room incident with my girl classmates. So far, they've been treating me casually. They're still not talking to me, but they stopped throwing dirty looks at me or whispering to each other when I'm there.

I'm still having a hard time because of that, but these guys have helped me make it through each school day.

 

 

"Where's Jungkook, by the way? Classes start in 5 minutes and he's still not here. He's always early. This is odd." Jimin said.

 

Jungkook's been kinda distant with me these past few days. He'd still joke around when the others are there, but he'll be quiet the second we're alone.

 

I have no clue why.

Actually, I am clueless in so many things lately.

I guess part of growing up is being clueless in life.

 

 

"Nica, could you ask Namjoon-hyung to teach me English?! I think I'll fail if I don't get tutored." V said.

"Oh, sure. I can." I replied.

V jumped for joy, " _Chincha_?! Yes!"

Jimin then said, "Oh, can I come too? I need help with my Math. I suck at Math and English. I bet Namjoon-hyung is good at both."

"You suck at everything except Arts, dummy." V teased.

Jimin pinched his nose, "Back at you, Mr. Smartypants. The only thing you're good at is falling asleep during class."

 

Jungkook finally arrived. He walked past me as we are seatmates.

I greeted him, "Goodmorning, Kookie."

"Ya, is that your nickname for him? How come I don't have a nickname?!" Jimin said, acting all cute with his voice.

"I call you Chim-chim, remember? And I call V... well... V." I said, smile spreading quickly across my lips.  _These boys are so adorable, my heart is literally aching for joy._

 

V and Jimin grinned. Jungkook just smiled at me.

 

"Jungkookie, do you want to join us? We're going to Nica's house this Saturday for a group study." Jimin said.

"My house? This Saturday?" I asked. _I thought I was gonna ask Namjoon-hyung first?!_

V nodded, "Oh, we forgot to tell you. We had it all planned before you came in earlier. I just asked you for... I don't know, formality?" He then smiled at me, looking all cute, so I couldn't refuse.

He asked Jungkook again, "Are you coming or not?! You need help with English and Math too, right?"

" _Majayo_. Math hates me, man. I'm gonna get an F for sure." Jungkook replied.

"So, are you coming with us or not?" asked V.

Jungkook replied, "Yeah. Sure."

 

He looked at me. Our eyes locked for a moment, and it's as my heart got struck by lightning.

 _What is happening?_ Only Jin-oppa could make me feel this way before.

 

I looked away and faced V and Jimin, "Just tell Namjoon and Yoongi-oppa about this at lunch later so we could set everything."

 

 

At lunch, my chingu's asked my oppa's if we could do a group study on Saturday at our house. Yoongi-oppa didn't want to at first 'cause he'd rather sleep all day than teach us Math (turns out he tutored Namjoon-oppa before so he's better at it), but I persuaded him with my dongsaeng charm (What can I do? He's a pushover when it comes to me. HIHIHI)

Jin and Hoseok-oppa decided to come along too. I think Jin-oppa was gonna do a Science project with Yoongi-oppa while Hoseok-oppa just wants to hang out with all of us (he kinda hates studying, tbh. He's just a lowkey genius that's why he's passing all of his exams.)

 

 

* * *

 

The week flew by and Saturday came. I woke up early to prepare everything for our group study. I don't want to rely on my oppa's to do that because it's just gonna be a disaster for sure (Namjoon-oppa is the master of destruction; he might burn our house down if he cooks. Yoongi-oppa, on the other hand, HATES waking up early on weekends; we'll starve to death if we wait for him to cook for us.)

I asked my mom to help me Jungkook -- I MEAN -- cook.

 

_Aish, why is he always on my mind?! This is getting ridiculous._

 

Anyway, I helped Eomma cook our breakfast before she leaves with Appa. My parents had decided to go on an overnight date somewhere since the boys might stay late in the house for the group study. I also asked her what we can cook for lunch later.

"I'm sure you'll be fine. If all else fails, Jin knows how to cook. You won't starve." Eomma reassured me.

I blushed. Jin-oppa sure is a good cook. 

 

Appa was quite nervous on leaving me alone with the boys so he reminded --- _more like threatened_ \--- my oppa's to take good care of me and protect me at all times. He even barged into their rooms and woke them up. Yoongi-oppa is quite scared of Appa so he couldn't throw a fit at him for waking him up so early. HAHA!

 

 

To be honest, I'm a bit excited to spend time with the boys today. It's my first time to be in a group study with boys so I don't know what to expect.

And...

I don't want to admit this, but...

 

_I am looking forward to seeing Jungkook today._

 

I've never seen him in casual clothes.

Ugh, just thinking about it makes my insides churn.

 

WAAAAAAHHH.

 _Erase erase._ I need to think about Jin-oppa.

Yes, Jin-oppa will be here, too. 

 

 

The doorbell rang...

 

 

"I'll get it!" I shouted. _I don't even know why I said that. I'm the only one awake in this house. It's not like Yoongi-oppa's gonna bother leaving his beloved bed to open the door._

 

 

When I opened the door, it was Jungkook.

We were both surprised to see each other.

"Hi." I said quietly.

He scratched his head and smiled at me, "Hi."

 

He looks so cute today. He was wearing a white t-shirt, cropped pants and light brown Timberland shoes.

 

"Come in." I said, letting him in.

He wandered his eyes upon entering our house.

"Have a seat. Do you want anything to drink?" I asked, trying to keep my cool.

"Am I the first one to arrive?" He asked.

I nodded, "The others are on their way for sure."

 

I quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed the muffins that me and my mom had baked this morning. I put one on a nice plate and served it to him with a fork.

 

"Oh, uhmm... thanks." he said shyly.

We gazed into each other's eyes again. Then I suddenly realized that we were both holding the plate; Jungkook's fingers were on top of mine.

 

I blused and panickly looked away. He grabed a bite on the muffin and stared at the ceiling.

 

**_THIS. IS. SO. AWKWARD._ **

 

 

The doorbell rang again. I WAS LITERALLY SAVED BY THE BELL.

 

"Go eat your muffin, I'll check the door." I said to him.

 

I ran to the door to open it; it was Jin-oppa, Jimin and V. They all came together.

 

"We ran into each other a few blocks from here! Coincidence." Jin-oppa told me.

 

My lips automatically curved into a smile when I saw his face. He's so handsome, as always. He's wearing a white shirt and a light pink sweater with faded denim pants. 

He looks so good in Pink. Pink is my favorite color now.

 

 

_You're doing great, Nica. That's it. Swoon over Jin-oppa. Keep going. This is the normal you._

 

 

"We are so ready to learn today." Jimin said.

"Let's go!" V shouted, raising both of his hands up.

 

I laughed the moment I saw them; Jimin was wearing an oversized striped shirt and jeans while V's sporting a denim jumpsuit on top of his white T-shirt. They both have large backpacks and were both wearing fake eyeglasses. _Dorks._

 

"Come on in." I said, while trying my hardest to laugh. It's my first time seeing them in their casual clothes (except for Jin-oppa)so I'm amused by how diverse their fashion sense is. 

 

They all greeted Jungkook with a hug when they entered the living room. V and Jungkook even did their weird ritual of a handshake -- they'd high-five, then jump, then do weird low-fives and side-fives then spin again then punch each other in the chest— honestly I can't memorize their whole routine. It's too complicated.

 

"You just saw each other yesterday." I said while laughing. _Seriously, these guys..._

"Where are your oppa's?" asked Jin-oppa.

"Upstairs. I am not sure if they're awake or not. Appa woke them up earlier, but they might have gone back to sleep." I answered with a shrug.

 

The boys all looked at each other and grinned. I'm pretty sure they're talking to each other telepathically.

 

"Kaja!" Jimin shouted.

They all ran upstairs. I quickly followed them.

"Where are their rooms?" asked V.

I pointed to the left, "Their rooms are in front of each other. Yoongi-oppa is on the---"

 

They didn't even let me finish my sentence. They all ran to the rooms and barged in. Jin-oppa and V went to Namjoon-oppa's room while Jimin and Jungkook went to Yoongi-oppa's room.

 

Jin-oppa pulled Namjoon-oppa's blanket, "YA! It's late! Wake up!"

V laid on top of Namjoon-oppa and wrestled him, "WAAAAKE UPPP!"

 

On the other room, Jimin and Jungkook were laughing their hearts out. Turns out, Yoongi-oppa cursed at them for waking him up.

Jin-oppa then went to Yoongi-oppa's room. Jimin warned him, "He sleeps like an angel, but he's like the devil's long lost son when you try to wake him up."

Jin-oppa replied confidently, "I can handle him."

He pinched Yoongi-oppa's butt, "Ya. Yoongi. Wake up. You're scaring these kids away."

Yoongi-oppa opened his eyes almost instantly. He was about to curse again, but he stopped himself and just moaned in frustration upon seeing Jin-oppa's face.

 

We all laughed. _I didn't know Jin-oppa is the trick in waking him up!_

 

"He didn't curse at you?" Jungkook said, his eyes wide because of curiosity.

"That's because I'm 3 months older than him, so basically I'm his hyung. Right, _dongsaeng_?" Jin confidently said.

"You always use that advantage in getting away with anything, _Hyung._ " Yoongi-oppa coldly said. _He's still half-asleep, mind you._

 

 

While my older brothers were washing up upstairs, Hoseok-oppa came. He said he slept in that's why he was late. He didn't bring any books with him unlike the others; I think he really has no plans in joining our group study today.

 

"You're really just hanging out with us today? You're not gonna study with Namjoon?" Jin-oppa asked him.

Hoseok-oppa smiled at him widely and said, "I'll behave, I promise. I'll stay out of your way when you're studying."

"Hyung just wants to spend time with us." Jimin added.

 

 

So after a couple of manly wrestlings and bickering (mostly it was V and Jimin) here and there, we all sat by the living room and started studying. V and Jimin were sitting next to Namjoon-oppa who was teaching them English; Jungkook and I sat next to each other while Yoongi-oppa teaches us Math. Jin-oppa is sitting at the dining table, doing research on his laptop. Hoseok-oppa, on the other hand, was nowhere to be found. I think he went to our backyard.

 

My heart is racing again. _Jungkook is sitting right next to me._ AAAAAAAHHHH. Why am I like this? I don't get it. I can't even control these feelings! This is stupid. Jungkook is my seatmate. He sits beside me all day in class!

 

I threw glances at him from time to time; he looks extra cute when he's focused. I noticed that he has this habit of touching his hair when he's tensed or confused about something.

"Nica." Yoongi-oppa called my name. _Shoot._ _Did he notice that I'm distracted?_

"Ne?" I answered.

"Are you done solving #23?" Yoongi-oppa asked. He's so serious when he's teaching. He could be a terror Math teacher someday.

I looked at my paper. _Good thing I finished solving before swooning over this boy beside me_ , "Yes. The answer is 6. Right?"

"6? Why did I get 1,485.87?!" Jungkook reacted. His eyes were so wide. He looks so confused.

Both Yoongi-oppa can't help but laugh at him. _His answer was not even slightly close to mine!_

"6 is the answer, Jungkook." Yoongi-oppa told him.

Jungkook grabbed my paper and compared it to his. He scratched his head, "Ya. I don't understand!! I even did the formula that you taught me!"

 

He's so cute! _Omo._

He's practically good at almost everything, except Math.

 

Yoongi-oppa scanned his solution and laughed even more, "That's not what I taught you! First of all, 9 times 6 is definitely NOT 96..."

 

I figured that it might take them a while to finish discussing the solution to #23, so I decided to leave them and look for Hoseok-oppa.

I went to our backyard, and there he was... **_dancing_**?

 

He stopped when he noticed that I was watching him, "Nica. What are you doing here?"

"Hey, why did you stop? You were so good!" I replied.

 

He really was. He was so into the music that his body has absorbed the rhythm & melody and beautifully transformed them into an amazing dance.

_I didn't know he was such a good dancer._

 

He stopped the music on his portable speakers and sat down. I sat beside him.

I nudged him, "I didn't know you could dance."

He smiled at me, embarrassed, "Nobody does. Well, except Namjoon."

"Why don't you join our school's dance club? You're really good." I said.

He said, in a sad tone, "My parents won't let me. They said I have no future if I pursue dancing."

 

I felt sad for him. I don't know what I'm gonna do if I don't have my parent's support.

 

I comforted him, "Hey... I'm sorry to hear that. Not having your parent's support in something that you really love is one of the worst things in the world so I can't imagine the pain and frustration you're feeling right now... Did you try talking to them?"

He shook his head, "Not yet. I really don't know what to say to them. They've already set the future for me -- which university I'll be going to in college, my course... I don't want to disappoint them, but at the same time, I don't want to lose myself and my true dream while trying to please them. I think that's the main reason why I hate studying and I don't even care if I pass my exams or not --- I think it's pointless. This is not what I really want. This is not the dream that I have for myself. It pains me that I'm caught between being a good son and being the person that I really want to be."

He sniffed. He's so close to crying, but he's holding it in.

I don't know why, but I started crying. It's just... I feel so bad that I can't help Hoseok-oppa with his struggles. I don't want to see him sad, but I don't know what to do to help him either!

 

He wiped my tears and started laughing at me, "Ya... Nica. Why are you crying! Stop crying!"

"I'm sorry... It's just... I... I cry when my friends are sad and I can't help them... It frustrates me..." I replied, while sobbing like a little girl.

Hoseok-oppa smiled and patted the top of my head, "You're here. That's all that matters. Thank you, Nica. It means a lot to me."

"Just remember that we are always here for you, Oppa. Your parents might not believe in you, but we do. Fighting." I said while sniffing in between.

Hoseok-oppa gave me his sunshine smile then pinched my cheeks, " _Aigoo_. Go inside. Yoongi-hyung and Namjoon will beat the hell out of me if they see you crying because of me."

 

 

_After our conversation, I learned that people are not what they really seem. Like Hoseok-oppa, he may show people that he's a ray of sunshine that brings happiness all around, but in reality, he's actually fighting a storm within himself._

I've realized that I should be more sensitive and nice to others 'cause everyone is fighting a battle that I know nothing about.

 

 _KFine, I'll be nicer to the girls in my class then_ -________-

 

 

* * *

 

I got inside and joined Yoongi-oppa and Jungkook. After 2 hours of solving Math problems, Yoongi-oppa decided to give us a break from studying. It was close to noon, so we were all starving.

Luckily, Jin-oppa was already preparing something in the kitchen. Yoongi-oppa told me to help him, so I did.  I put on my apron and stood next to him on the kitchen counter. He was slicing onions at that time.

 

"I am your assistant for today. How can I help?" I asked him, acting all cute.

He grinned, "Good. I thought I'm gonna be stuck with Namjoon again."

"Ya, I heard that." Namjoon-oppa replied. He was still tutoring Jimin and V.

I chuckled, "What are you planning to cook?"

"Japchae and Kimchi stew. I was really planning on cooking pasta, but then Jimin said he was craving Kimchi stew, and Yoongi doesn't like pasta but LOVES Japchae, so..."  he explained.

 

 _He's really husband material._ His cooking is one of the main reasons why I like him.

 

He went to the stove. Looks like he's already finished cooking the stew.

"Taste this." he said. He's holding a spoonful of broth from the stew. He even blew on the hot soup for a bit before putting the spoon in my mouth.

 _Oooh, it's so yummy!_ "Masshiseo, oppa. I can't wait to eat!"

He smiled at me sweetly, " _Chincha_? It's my first time cooking this dish. I'm happy that you liked it."

 

 

Then someone coughed.

We both looked, it was Jungkook.

He was standing in front of us, just behind the kitchen counter.

 

"Can I help, too?" he said. He has this stern expression on his face.

"No, it's fine, Jungkook. Nica is helping me already." Jin-oppa replied.

Jungkook insisted, "But... I want to help."

 

He gave me a sharp look. _Why is he so cocky all of a sudden?!_

My inner self's thinking that he's just jealous of Jin-oppa...

 

 ** _But he can't be_**... He's not jealous. No way.

 

 

Or is he?

 

 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is cute right? I know.


	4. Kook-ing disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you like the pun? I love the pun. LOL

Jungkook looked at me then at Jin-oppa. I honestly don't know what's on his mind right now.  _Well, maybe he wants to learn how to cook?_

"Do you have any extra aprons, Nica?" he asked me.

I blinked. It took me 5 seconds before I could answer, "Ahh... Yes. Somewhere... I --- NAMJOON-OPPA! Where are the aprons?"

"Why are you asking Namjoon? Eomma never lets him cook, how could he know?" Suga-oppa answered me.

I scratched my head. Then, I remembered that they were placed on the upper shelf on one of our cupboards. 

I tiptoed to reach it, but I can't.

"Here let me---"

"I can--"

Jin-oppa and Jungkook both reached for the aprons to help me. Their hands even clashed.

They looked at each other.

I'm stuck in between them; their arms touching both sides of my head.

"I will reach it for you, Nica dear. Since these two are just standing here staring at each other." I didn't notice that Jimin was standing behind me. He reached for an apron and gave it to me. "What is wrong with the both of you? Are you fighting over who gets the apron?" Jimin asked Jungkook and Jin-oppa.

Both of them walked away from the cupboard and didn't say a thing.

"You guys are so weird." Jimin said. He then looked at me and smiled, "Nica, I'll be waiting for the food that you'll cook. Fighting!"

"Jiminie, don't disturb her! Can't you see she's busy? Besides, we are not yet done with English! Come here, _Ppali_! " V shouted.

Jimin ran back to the living room to finish whatever they were doing. I went to Jungkook who was by the sink washing some vegetables and handed him the apron, "Your shirt might get wet. Wear this."

"Can you help me wear it? My hands are wet." he asked.

He lowered his head so I can place the apron onto him. Then he turned around so I can tie the laces on his back. My chest felt like exploding 'cause he was so close to me. I can't help but stare at his nice, broad back. _He smells good, too._

"Thank you." he said softly. He gave me his signature bunny smile. I feel like fainting.

_WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME. THIS IS NOT RIGHT._

 

I walked away 'cause I might pass out any minute if I stay there any longer. I went over to where Jin-oppa was, "Anything I could do to help, Oppa?"

"You can cut the onions, if you like." he answered. He was cutting the pork for the Japchae.

He's extra handsome when he cooks. I love how focused and gentle he is when he's in the kitchen.

I got some onions and stood beside Jin-oppa. I was dumbfounded for a moment 'cause I realized that I actually don't know how to cut onions. _How embarrassing._

"Oppa..." I whispered.

He looked at me and smirked, "You want me to show you how to cut onions?"

"I always watch my mom do it. How about you watch me and then just tell me if I'm doing it wrong?" I replied.

"Okay. Be careful with the knife." he said.

I nodded. I grabbed the knife and started cutting. My hands were trembling not because I don't know what I'm doing, but because Jin-oppa is staring at me. 

"Wait, wait, wait..." he then said, "You need to do it like this." He stood behind me, placed his chin on my shoulder, held both of my hands and showed me how to cut the onions, "Cut them like this. It's easy, right?"

 

HE IS HOLDING MY HANDS

HE IS SO CLOSE THAT I COULD FREAKIN' FEEL HOW WARM AND SOFT HIS CHEEK IS NEXT TO MINE

SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE OH MY GOODNESS I MIGHT STAB MYSELF

 

"Hyung, I'm done." Jungkook just came out of nowhere holding the vegetables that he washed. His cocky self is back, apparently.

Jin-oppa let go of me and faced him, "Thank you, Jungkook."

Jungkook didn't say a word to him. He gazed at me and said, "You still don't know how to cut onions?!"

I pouted, "Well, Jin-oppa taught me." I glanced at Jin-oppa and grinned.

Jungkook rolled his eyes and creased his brows. _What is up with this boy? Honestly. He was a cute little bunny when I was putting his apron on, now he's acting up again._

I just ignored him and continued cutting the onions. 

"Hyung, why did you let her cut the onions?! I should've done it. She doesn't know anything." Jungkook complained.

"Aish, Jungkook. Calm down. You're not supposed to be here anyway, Nica was the first one to volunteer in helping me cook. Let her do it." Jin-oppa answered.

I turned my back and looked at Jungkook who was still busy pouting. I was so preoccupied by his tantrums that I didn't notice that what I was cutting was not the onions anymore, but my own finger.

"Aw!" I shouted. I hurriedly let go of the knife that I was holding. My finger was obviously bleeding so I ran to the sink and wash my cut.

"What happened?!" Jin-oppa and Jungkook shouted in chorus. They both rushed to the sink to check on me.

Jungkook took my hand and checked my wound. In the blink of an eye, he transformed into a caring, concerned friend to me. _It's like he has a split personality._

"Good thing it's not too deep." he said, while still holding my hand.

I replied, "I can---"

He cut me off, pulled my hand, placed it on the sink and let the cold water run through my wounded finger, "You should be careful, Nica."

 

My heart melted. His voice was so calm and soothing that I almost forgot that Jin-oppa, _my ultimate forever childhood crush_ , is standing next to us.

 

"Are you okay?" Jin-oppa asked me.

I looked at him, a bit embarrassed by my booboo, "Yes, Oppa. Sorry, I was so busy listening to you guys that I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing."

Jin-oppa punched Jungkook's shoulder, "Ya, this is your fault."

Jungkook didn't say anything. He just threw a glance at me and continued tending to my hand.

Just then, my big brothers came, both in a panic.

"WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?!" Yoongi-oppa said.

"NICA, _gwaenchanha_?!" Namjoon-oppa asked.

"Calm down you guys, she just cut her finger while cutting onions. She'll live." Jungkook answered.

Jin-oppa rolled his eyes, "Says the boy who almost jumped on Nica..." then he turned to face my brothers, "I should continue cooking. The stew is boiling already. My assistant is injured, RapMon can you help me cook the Japchae?"

"RapMon?!" I asked. _This is not the first time I heard someone call my Namjoon-oppa that name._

Namjoon-oppa made a face at Jin-oppa then looked at me and smiled. He faced Jin-oppa and replied, "I might burn the whole house if I cook, Hyung. Are you sure?"

"You'll be fine. I'll be watching you like a hawk. Suga, you too. Help me with the veggies." Jin-oppa instructed.

"Suga?!" Jungkook asked. _I heard that nickname somewhere, too..._

Yoongi-oppa looked at Jin-oppa sternly, "Watch your mouth, Jin."

" _Wae_? Did you not tell them about ---" Jin-oppa did not finish his sentence as Yoongi-oppa dragged him by his shirt, "Maybe we should just cook. Let's go."

Namjoon-oppa tapped Jungkook's shoulder before following the two, "Take care of Nica, Kookie."

Jungkook and I went to the living room where Jimin and V were still busy reviewing English.

Jungkook asked me, "Where's your first-aid kit?"

I replied, "It's in the bathroom cabinet, I'll grab it---"

He didn't let me finish my sentence again, "I'll do it. Sit here." He stood up and left.

 

Jimin and V then noticed that my finger is bleeding.

"Oh no!" Jimin said, as he quickly came and check my cut. V followed him and looked at it, too.

"Are you okay, Nica? What happened? We should get some medicine and band-aids for it." V said to me.

"I just cut my finger while cutting onions.I'm fine, V. Don't worry." I answered.

"From now on, call me Taehyung. Or TaeTae. V's for strangers and people that I'm not close to." He gave me his adorable box smile, "Is it deep? Let me see." he said, giving me the cutest smile ever. _My heart melted like chocolate._

Then, Jungkook came back with the first-aid kit. He basically sprinted to where we were and yelled, "Ya! Don't touch her finger with your dirty hands! It might get infected!" he shouted as he push them aside and hit their backs.

Jimin hit Jungkook's butt, "You're so overprotective."

V -- _no, no_ \-- Taehyung yelled at him, "We didn't touch her wound, of course! You don't need to hit us! Aish."

Jungkook ignored them. He sat beside me, opened the kit and started dressing my wound. He tried to be as gentle as possible, so I didn't feel a sting when he put the medicine on it. He was also extra careful when placing the band-aid on the area.

I was in awe of how he tended my cut. He treated it as if it was a serious burn or something. I've never seen this side of Jungkook before.

"Thank you." I said softly to him when he was finished.

He scratched his head and looked away, "Just... be careful next time okay?"

Jimin pulled Jungkook away from me and sat beside me, "Nica, I know the best way to heal your cut."

"What?" I asked.

Jimin grabbed my hand and kissed my finger, exactly where the bandage is, "There."

I blushed. This is the first time that a guy, other than my dad, kissed my hand. _Well, technically it's just my finger, but..._

"My mom said a kiss heals everything." Jimin said. He smiled widely at me and pinched my cheek.

Taehyung sat in front of me and held my hand, "Does it still hurt? Be more careful next time, okay? If you really don't know how to cut the onions, just call me and I'll cut them for you."

Jimin kicked Taehyung lightly on the thigh, "You don't even know how to open a stove, how could you cut the onions?! _Pabo._ "

Taehyung answered with a pout, "It's better that I do it so when it comes to worst, I would get hurt, not her."

"You're so sweet, TaeTae. Thank you. Thank you, Jimin for uhm... kissing my finger. I feel much better." I said.

 

_I can't believe how sweet they all are to me. My heart is so full right now._

 

Jimin and Taehyung came back to their spots and continued on their study session. Jungkook and I were left alone again.

Jungkook, while looking at the ceiling, then said to me, "I'm really glad it's just a cut. I don't know what I'm gonna do if something bad ever happens to you."

He then looked at me straight in the eye. I swore my heart beat so loud that he could probably hear it.

 

Seriously, what's wrong with him?!

_Blowing hot and cold on me all the time._

 

 

Hoseok-oppa then came in, breaking our moment, "I'm hungry! Is the food ready? We should set the table."

"I think they're still cooking, Hyung." Jungkook replied.

Hoseok-oppa then noticed my finger, "Oh no, what happened?"

"Onions. Knife. Finger. Clumsy." I replied. 

He ruffled my hair and said, "You're clumsy like Namjoon, I see. I'm glad it's just a cut." He then went to the dining table and started setting the table. I stood up to help him and Jungkook followed me.

I got some plates and utensils from the cupboard (I can reach them this time) and placed them on the table. Hoseok-oppa and Jungkook went outside to get extra chairs for us. Jimin and Taehyung noticed what we're doing, so they wrapped up their things and helped as well. Jimin went to the kitchen to get rice and Taehyung went to the fridge to get water.

Luckily, the food is ready by the time we're finished. _Yay!_

Namjoon-oppa came out of the kitchen, proudly holding the Japchae that he "cooked". Jin-oppa was right behind him, holding a pot of Kimchi stew.

"Oh, they both smell so good! I can't wait to eat." Jimin said, rubbing his tummy.

Hoseok-oppa and Jungkook then entered, carrying the chairs.

I quickly counted the chairs that we have, "Oh, we still need one more chair. I'll quickly grab---"

 

"ANDWAE!" All screamed at me, in unison.

"Your hand is injured, Nica. Just sit down and let the boys grab the chair." Yoongi-oppa demanded.

"It's just a cut, Oppa. It's not like I lost a finger. I'll be quick." I insisted.

I swiftly went outside and grabbed one of our patio chairs. I was about to lift it up, but Jungkook managed to snatch the chair from me.

I pouted, "I can carry that, you know. I have 2 hands."

"I know. I just don't want you to. Your cut might bleed again if you put pressure on it by carrying something heavy." he said, "I'm starving. Let's go."

"Hey, wait." I blurted out.

Jungkook stopped walking and looked back at me.

"Why are you like this? I just... I don't understand why at times you get so cocky at me, especially when the others are around. You won't even talk to me at school. Why are you so awkward with me, all of a sudden? Did I do something wrong?" I said.

He looked down again and replied, softly, "Of course not..." He then glanced at me and sighed,  "...I'm sorry if I confuse you with my actions or if I get so moody when it comes to you," he gazed at me again with his big, coal black eyes and added, "I... just... Ihavemyreasons."

He's talking too fast that I thought he was rapping.

"You have your reasons to be cocky at me?" I asked him again.

He really can't look at me directly. He started mumbling again, "Yes. I mean... no. I don't know. All I can say is I'm sorry. And... mebeingcockydoesntmeanthatIdontcareaboutyou. Cause I do. A lot." then he stared at the sky again, "Like Jimin does. And Taehyung. Icareforyou -- We care for you. Because we're friends."

I stared at him blankly, processing the words he just said to me. 

He then screamed and lifted the chair above his head to express his frustration, "I'm sorry. I'm not really good in expressing myself. I get so uncomfortable when I talk about my feelings."

There was a long pause between us. Jungkook sighed, touched his hair and looked at me. _My heart started flipping out again, for the nth time._

"Well, look at that. Now I know you have atleast one thing that you're not good at." I said. I smiled widely at him. 

"Yeah, I guess." he replied.

"Oh wait. Plus, Math. There are two things you're not good at." I added, while chuckling.

 

 

_And finally, I saw his cute bunny smile again._

 

  
  



	5. Transferee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kinda fast-paced. Yeah. That's it.

_Another day at school..._

 

"Ya, Jimin. I'm not kidding! I feel like someone's following me when I'm on my way to school!"

Taehyung covered his face. He's been throwing tantrums the minute he walked in class.

Jimin grins at him and patted him on the head, "Taehyungie, I think you're just overreacting. You need to stop watching dramas."

Taehyung glared at him, "I am not making it up! I saw her! Well, almost. She was just good at hiding and running away. I'm gonna catch  _her_  someday."

"Her? Your stalker is a girl?" I asked him.

Taehyung ran to me, squatted in front of my desk, eyes widened, "Nica, you believe me right?!"

I squished his cheeks, "I believe you, Taehyungie. Please be careful, okay?"

He gave me a cute smile then turned to Jimin, all smugged. His expression telling him  _I told you so_. Jimin pouted and crossed his arms.  _Honestly, these two. Their cute bickering makes my day._

"Maybe that girl has a crush on you." Jungkook said.  _Yup, he's here. I am well aware that he's here 'cause my legs keep twitching for whatever reason._

"But isn't it a little creepy that she follows me everyday? She even knows where I live. She knows which route I take, even the shortcuts. It's kinda creepy." Taehyung replied.

"Do you know what she looks like?" Jimin asked.

Taehyung looked up, trying to remember his stalker's face, "Hmmm... Not quite. I remember that she has long h---"

 

He was cut off by the school bell. He and Jimin ran to their desk just before our teacher entered the classroom. To our surprise, a girl walked behind him.  _A transferee, I guess?_

Our first period teacher asked her to introduce herself. The girl faced us, all smiles, and said, "Good morning, my name is Jennie Kim. Please treat me well."

She is quite pretty; long, ash brown hair that's up to her waist, cat-like eyes, and a super tiny physique. 

 

I wonder if she'll turn out like my other girl classmate who hate me for "hanging out with the cool guys."  _Ugh._

 _Seriously, why do they glorify these 7 dorks so much?_ They are not cute!

Except for Jin-oppa.

And well,  _uhm..._  Jungkook.

And Hobi-oppa is cute too.

And Jimin and V.

And my brothers, too.

_Fine, they ARE cute._

 

_Nica, get out of your brain. You're in class. You need to focus on studying -- or something._

 

"Jennie, sit beside Taehyung. Are you guys related at all since you're both Kim's?" our teacher asked.

Jennie shook her head. Taehyung, _as always_ , just stared at her blankly, and responded, "Well, you know that 1/3 of this class are Kim's, right Sir?" Jennie giggled timidly, covering her mouth with her hand as she sat beside him.

 

Then our class resumed. I would throw glances at Jennie, as I'm not used to someone sitting beside Taehyung. Although all I can see is the back of her head, I could tell that she's confident and she can carry herself very well. 

She reminds me of my eldest brother too, Yoongi-oppa, as both of them have a resting bitch face. HA.HA.

 

"She's cute, Nica. But not as cute as you." Jimin whispered to me. He probably noticed me staring at Jennie's back, "It's just a wonder that she transferred here at this time. We're towards the second half of the school year."

 

 

* * *

 

Next period was PE,  _which I totally hate not because I'm not athletic, but because my girl classmates get to hurt me every chance they get_  --- may it be hitting me with a volleyball, basketball, tennis ball, soccer ball, or even pushing me to the pool (good thing Jungkook was a swimmer, he saved me that one time). They may have been treating me casually for quite a while after the change room incident, but that didn't last very long. The only consolation is, they won't do anything when the boys are near me; I sit in between Jimin and Jungkook in class and I always eat lunch with the whole gang in the cafeteria, so they couldn't get to bully me most of the time. Well, except PE. Girls are almost always separated from boys during PE.

I'm putting up with all of this because I don't want it to be a big deal. Besides, they only get to do it during PE.

 

Anyway, we are doing gymnastics for today's class.

"Oh, thank God. They can't hit me with a ball today." I said softly to myself.

Taehyung, who was standing beside me, said, "We'll be using ribbons. They can't hit you with ribbons, though. Can they?"

"Well, they managed to hurt me when we took tap dance classes last time, remember? Who knows what they'll do this time." I answered.

Taehyung shook his head then tapped the tip of my head with his big hand, " _Gwaenchanha_ , Nica. I will protect you."

 _My TaeTae is so sweet_. I smiled at him and said, "Thank you, Superman."

Jimin, who was on my other side, squeezed my hand, "Don't worry, I got you, too. They need to stop bullying you though. It's been months. We're 2/3 done with school."

Jungkook,  _surprisingly_ , walked in between us, forcing Jimin to let go of my hand. He is his usual Jung-cocky self again.

 

 _JUNGCOCKY._ LOL.

 

Jungkook glanced at me, "I need to stand beside you in case they push you again or something. You're as fragile as paper."

Then he smiled to himself -- it lasted for 2 seconds, like he was too embarrassed about what he had told me.

I nudged him on his stomach, causing him to groan. That's when his bunny smile appeared.

 

Our PE teacher called them out, "Jimin, Jungkook, Taehyung. Come here. Boys are separated from girls. Line up with Taemin."

 

_Darn it. My bodyguards are gone._

 

 

Our PE class began, and I was so amused by how great Jimin is!  _That boy, I swear, is really flexible._  He nailed every routine.

So far, my girl classmates have not thought of any dirty tricks. I was starting to think that they got tired of being such horrible human beings and maybe even decided to leave me alone.

 

But then our teacher handed us the ribbons.

 

Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook were watching me like a hawk from across the gym, making sure that my bullies are not up to something.

"Hey, I heard you." 

I looked at the direction of the voice. It was Jennie who just spoke, and she was kind of confronting Wendy.

"I could report you to the office, you know." Jennie said.

Wendy then glanced at me and then back to Jennie, "So you're siding with that flirt? You're gonna regret it." She walked away and joined the other bullies.

I approached Jennie, "Hi. It's Jennie, right? I'm--"

"Nica. I know." she replied. She looked at the girls, "I've been listening to them since the beginning of the period and they won't stop talking about you. I don't wanna say anything 'cause I'm a transferee, and transferees were supposed to quiet, right? But then one of them said that it would be fun to see you trip with the ribbons. That's when I've decided to confront them. Were they always this terrible to you?"

I nodded.

Her jaw dropped, "And you're not doing anything?"

I shook my head.

 

 

PE ended, and it's the first time that I did not experience any physical pain, nor I am wet.

_Thanks to Jennie._

 

To return the favor, I asked Jennie if we could sit together at lunch. The 7 dorks came to our table to say hello to her before they all sat to our usual spot. I admit, I missed having a girl to talk to. Sure, the gang welcomes me with open arms and makes me feel loved, but it really makes a difference when I get to chat with a girl, mostly because _I, myself, is a girl_. I get to share stories about our cute Math prof, the latest trends in fashion and make-up, the new BTS album (OMG, I kinda freak out when I found out that she's also a big fan of them), and basically everything else that I couldn't, _or wouldn't_ , be able to share with the boys.

We didn't even notice that lunch time was over because we had so much fun just talking.

 

Before we head back to class, Jennie stopped me, "Wait, I need to go pee. Could you come with me?" 

 

Another perk of having a girl friend --- I have someone to go to the bathroom with when I need to.  _YES!_

Imagine if I had to ask Taehyung or Jimin to come with me to the bathroom?  _Gahd._

 

I waited outside the washrooms for Jennie. I was busy daydreaming about Jungkook ---  _NO, JIN-OPPA. I WAS BUSY DAYDREAMING ABOUT JIN-OPPA_ \--- when all of a sudden someone, I think he's from another class, ran past me and threw chocolate milk all over my uniform.

"YA!" I screamed.

My chest was covered with chocolate. Some of it was on my hair, too.

 

Luckily, the boys passed by. They all ran to me.

"Oh no. What happened?! Is this the girls' fault again?!" asked Yoongi-oppa.

I shook my head. I can't say anything because if I say anything, I will totally cry. I can't cry today. I don't want to cry today.

Namjoon-oppa put his arm around my shoulder, comforting me, "Let's get you to the clinic. I'm sure they have extra uniforms there that they could spare you."

 

Just then, Jennie came out of the bathroom, all surprised, "What happened?!"

"We'll take her to the clinic. Someone threw chocolate milk on her. See you in class." Taehyung told her.

Jennie blinked, "All seven of you are coming with her?! Why are you bringing her to the clinic, it doesn't look like she's hurt or anything." 

"We just want to make sure she's okay." Hoseok-oppa replied.

"Tell Bang Seonsaeng we'll be late." Jimin said.

 

We all left Jennie and head out to the clinic.

Upon reaching there, I told them off, "We're here. I'm fine. It's not like this is the first time that someone attacked me. I'm not hurt. My uniform is just dirty, that's all."

Jin-oppa pinched my cheek, "We won't leave until you're done. Come inside and ask for a spare uniform. We'll be right here."

Taehyung looked at his wrist watch, "I'll come with you. There's still 10 minutes before the bell rings."

 

Taehyung came with me inside the clinic. I asked for a spare uniform, but the nurse said that today is laundry day so they can't let me borrow any.

"What am I gonna do then?" I huffed.

 

_Just when I thought that this day's gotten better because finally I have a girl friend to talk to, someone decided to throw chocolate milk on me._

 

Taehyung charmingly asked, "Nurse Min, since it's laundry day... Can you wash Nica's uniform too?"

I hit his arm, "What?! They don't have any spare uniform, Tae. I can't go to class with nothing on!" I exclaim, covering my chest with my arms.

Taehyung started unbottoning his uniform,  _yes, right in front of me and the nurse and probably 3 other sick students lying on the clinic beds_ ,"You can use mine in the meantime. We could come back right after our 4th period to get your uniform."

He gently held his uniform by the sleeves and jerked it off his shoulders, then his arms.  _Good thing he's wearing a tshirt underneath._ He even smelled it before handing it to me, "I didn't sweat so much so it's still good. Good thing I put on my cologne this morning so it smells nice." He pointed to the bathroom behind the nurse's desk, "Go change now. We'll be late for class." Then he smiled widely at me, and I can't help but cry a little bit. 

 

Taehyung might be weird sometimes, and honestly I don't get how his mind works. He has mood swings and he acts like a kid.

He might have his quirks, but he sure knows how to treat a girl right. I am just so lucky to have him as my friend.

 

As I walk towards the bathroom, Taehyung called me, "Nica..."

I turned around, " _De_?"

"Cheer up, okay? We got you. Oh, and also, wash your hair. You have chocolate on there, too." he said, warmly. That's the only time I get to realize how manly his voice is. It's so deep, yet so calming. Hearing it reminds me of drinking coffee on a rainy day.

I smiled at him and changed.

 

When we got out of the clinic, 6 pairs of eyes were staring at me.

Suga-oppa was the first one to move. He hit Taehyung on the head, "YA! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY NICA?! IS THE CLINIC EMPTY?! YOU PERVERT!"

I shielded Taehyung with my body, "OPPA! There are no spare uniforms for me so Taehyung offered his! WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?!"

Yoongi-oppa's small eyes enlarged. He scratched his head in embarrassment, "Well... he didn't have his uniform on...and you... you were wearing it... so I thought... we thought..."

Jimin hit Taehyung on his tummy, "You scared us, Tae! I thought you made a move at Nica while you were inside!"

"Why are you all hitting me?! Aish." Taehyung complained.

I faced Taehyung. I held the hem of his uniform and said to him, "Thank you for letting me wear this, Taehyung. You are such a gentleman."

"Anything for our princess." Taehyung answered with a smile.

"Are you sure you're okay, Nica?" Jin-oppa asked me, looking all worried.

I blushed and nodded, " _Ne_ , Oppa. I'm fine. Really."

Hoseok-oppa said, "Should we go to the Principal's office and report this? This is too much."

"No, Oppa. I don't want my parents to worry about me. They have too much on their plate already." I replied.

 

 

We all went back to class afterwards, and sure enough I caught attention again because I'm wearing Taehyung's uniform.

I didn't mind them. I am still touched by Taehyung's gesture.

I held the collar of Tae's uniform and smelled it.  _Wow._ So this is Taehyung's scent. I'm not very familiar with men's cologne, but I like how his uniform smells. It's like walking into a meadow full of flowers after a long walk. I can't help but smile while looking at the name tag that's sown on the uniform's left side pocket that reads  _Kim Taehyung._

 

Jennie came by my desk, "Why are you wearing Taehyung's uniform?"

I can tell that she was pissed, with her crossed arms and irritated look.

 

_What the heck did I do now?!_

 

"The clinic can't let me borrow any extra uniforms, so Tae gave me his. He asked the nurse if they could wash mine. I'll go grab it and change after our 4th period." I explained.

" _Tae._ " She smiled sweetly at me, as if she wasn't practically glowering 5 seconds ago, "I got so worried about you when I came out of the bathroom. Are you okay?"

I nodded, still puzzled about how she's acting.

 

 

Nonetheless, I shrug it off. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, given the fact that I'm bullied almost everyday, so I find it really hard to trust anyone in this school except, of course, my 7 dorky knights in shining armor.

Jennie has a resting bitch face, so maybe I just thought that she was mad at me when in reality, it's just her face. 

 

_Aish, Nica._

 

Few weeks had passed, and Jennie and I were practically inseparable. We would always eat lunch together and even walk home together. It feels good having her really, as I feel like a girl again. 

Too much time hanging out with the boys made me adapt to their manly nature, and now that I have Jennie, I can be myself again.

I still hang out with them, though not as often as before. Jungkook is still not chummy with me,  _as he has his reasons_ , but I still get to spend time with Taehyung and Jimin in between classes.

 

HOWEVER...

 

I noticed that Jennie would always interrupt our conversation, no matter what it is.  _Again,_  I chose to shrug it off, thinking that she's just trying to fit in. I didn't mind it; I'm even happy that she gets to be friends with my friends.

 

Upon dismissal today, Jennie invited me over to a coffee shop nearby to review for our exam tomorrow (WOW, WHERE DID THE TIME GO? WE ARE REVIEWING FOR OUR 3RD QUARTERLY EXAMS!). When we reached the school gate, the boys were all there.

I approached my eldest brother, "Yoongi-oppa, I'm not going home yet. Jennie and I will review for our exam tomorrow. Will text you as soon as I head home."

Yoongi-oppa has a stern look in his face.  _Am I in trouble?_  "Let me talk to you for a second." Then he looked at Jennie, who was standing beside me, "Mom told me something before we left for school this morning."

"What?! I swear I didn't eat the last piece of cake in the fridge!" I looked at Jennie, "Jennie, why don't you go ahead and I'll meet you at the coffee shop? Save us seats. I'll come over as soon as I can."

"Okay." she smiled sheepishly then walked away.

The boys waited for her to be a few feet away before they all hovered around me, like they were doing a ritual and I am the sacrifice.

"What is this?! Look, Oppa I really need to study---"

"We're worried about you, Nica." Jin-oppa said.

"Worried? Why?" I asked, totally oblivious.

Hoseok-oppa then confessed, "This... Jennie. I... We don't trust her."

I chuckled. I looked at Jimin and Taehyung, "You talk to her everyday!"

"We feel like she's hiding something. Like she's just pretending to like you." Taehyung said.

"I'm sorry, Nica. I know you like her a lot, but we have a bad feeling about her." Jimin said.

 

I stood there in silence.

"We are just looking out for you." Jungkook said. He even held my hand.

I scoffed, "Looking out for me?! You're not even talking to me, Jungkook, because you have "your reasons"! Jennie is a nice girl and after everything that I've been through since the beginning of the school year, I finally get to be myself again. I love hanging out with all of you but it is nicer to be with a girl sometimes. BECAUSE I AM A GIRL! And you know what, atleast Jennie doesn't have crazy fangirls that bully me every single day --- hitting me with all kinds of balls, pushing me to the swimming pool, or even throw chocolate milk on my uniform! I'm sorry to break this to you, but hanging out with all of you sucks."

"Nica..." Hoseok-oppa said, his voice was calm but firm.

"I'll see you all tomorrow." I pushed them all aside and walked away.

 

I felt so bad for saying those things to the guys. I know that they're just looking out for me, but I was offended by how they see Jennie as a bad influence. Jennie is my only girl friend in school, and it kills me that they want me to stop hanging out with her.

After our confrontation, I went to the coffee shop only to find Jennie standing outside the store with her phone out.

"Why are you here? I told you to save us seats." I told her.

"I have this friend that's throwing a birthday party tonight. and she just texted me the directions to the venue. Wanna come?" Jennie replied.

"WHAT?! Jen, we have an exam tomorrow!" I grabbed her by the wrist, pulling her towards the cafe.

She stopped me, "It'll be quick, I promise! I want my friends to meet you because I've been telling so many stories about you and they can't wait to see you in person. We'll say hi, eat, and then leave. We'll be out of there in 1 hour. C'mmon, Nica. Please?! Have you ever been to a party before?! Now is your chance! You need to have fun sometimes! Meet new people!"

Her words got me thinking. I've never been to a party before, and I think I need to loosen up a bit. Being bullied and attacked almost everyday at school sure suck the life out of me. Besides, it's just one exam tomorrow. We still have lots of time to study.

I caved in,"Fine. 1 hour. No more, no less." 

Jennie hopped in excitement, "YES!"

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

**_ The morning after... _ **

 

"NO!" I answered.  _My head hurts._

"THEN WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, NICA?! ARE YOU EVEN THINKING AT ALL?!" Yoongi-oppa doesn't scream. He might seem to be a cold and heartless person to others but he is actually a gentle and caring brother to me and Namjoon-oppa. When I get into trouble, Yoongi-oppa's the one to comfort me and tell me that everything will be alright.

So hearing him scream at me for the first time in my life makes me feel more miserable than I already do.

 

We are on our way to school, all 4 of us -- me, my brothers, and Jin-oppa. I am practically crawling because my head hurts so bad and the sun is burning my eyes and I can't even walk nor think straight.

 

What makes it worse is I have 3 guys, all of them glaring at me as I struggle.

 

Jin-oppa never said a word to me since our confrontation yesterday. I figured that he already knew what happened to me as Yoongi-oppa tells him everything. Namjoon-oppa has his arm around me to assist me in walking, but hasn't said one word to me either.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I TOLD YOU JENNIE IS A BAD INFLUENCE!" Yoongi-oppa raised his voice again.

"Oppa, can you please calm down? My head is spinning and it hurts more everytime you shout." I held my head.

"We were so worried about you last night, Nica. Jungkook even stayed in front of our door until midnight, waiting for you." Namjoon-oppa finally spoke.

 

Jungkook.

_Jungkook waited for me?!_

 

"Tell me exactly what happened. Why were you home so late and why are you such in a bad shape today? Did you drink?!" Yoongi-oppa said. _Honestly, he's the shortest out of these 3 guys but he has the loudest and scariest voice._

"I told you, countless times, I don't remember anything. I can't even remember how I got home." I replied.

"Jin took you home." Yoongi-oppa looked at Jin-oppa.

I stopped walking and tugged on Jin-oppa's sleeve, "You took me home?!"

Jin-oppa can't even look at me in the eye.  _Gahd, I feel so terrible._  He tells me, "I found you sleeping outside the coffee shop. Yoongi texted us all saying that you haven't come home yet then I remembered that you were supposed to review with  _that Jennie girl_ at the cafe near our school. You were unconscious when I found you. I was so worried."

Namjoon-oppa continued his story, "Hyung was crying when he reached our house carrying you. We thought something bad had happened to you."

Jin-oppa looked away, his eyes red, fighting not to shed a tear.

Yoongi-oppa held me by the shoulders and looked at me, his eyes full of worry, "Please. Nica. I beg you. Stay away from that Jennie. I don't trust her."

 

 

* * *

 

When I reached our homeroom, I quickly grabbed Jennie's wrist and took her to the far end of the corridors so no one would hear us.

"JENNIE, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?! YOU FREAKIN' LEFT ME AT THE COFFEE SHOP?! Jin-oppa found me lying there, unconscious!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I am mad at her for bringing me to that party in the first place, furious at myself to even let this happen, and confused at the whole situation that I am in. 

She stared at me, bewildered, "You really don't remember?"

I swear to Goodness if my parents had not taught me that it's bad to strangle someone, I would have strangled her, "I DON'T! Would I ask you if I do?!"

"You were having so much fun last night that you told me to screw our exam and danced the night away. You liked this one friend that I have, Sehun ---"

I cut her off, "Sehun?" _WHO THE HECK IS SEHUN?!_

She smiled at me, "Sehun! Remember? I introduced him to you. You told me he was kinda cute."

 

Sehun. 

Yes, I remember him now. Tall, with blond hair and charming eyes.

 

"Cut to the chase Jennie. Why was I at the coffee shop?!" 

Jennie shrugged, "I don't know. We were having fun and then you said Sehun was gonna take you home ---"

I cut her off again, "You let a stranger take me home?!"

She replied, "Well, you said that you trust him! Look, I don't get why you can't remember anything last night. I'm sorry if I let Sehun take you home. You insisted to come with him so I didn't have a choice."

I didn't respond. I'm still trying to recall what happened last night --- all I remember is reaching there, meeting Jennie's friends, eating, dancing, drinking a tequila shot... and that was it.

"Maybe it's just the hangover that's gotten you all groggy or something. It'll come to you once you sober up. Why don't we head to the cafeteria and get some coffee?" Jennie grabbed me by the shoulders.

 

_WHY CAN'T I REMEMBER ANYTHING?!_

 

I am not on speaking terms with Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung so I guess they all know what I did last night. I miss them, and it doesn't really help that I sit in between Jimin and Jungkook and Taehyung is just sitting 2 desks away from me. I want to talk to them but I don't know what to say. 

6th period came and it's time for our exam. I didn't get to study so I'm pretty sure I'm gonna fail.  _UGH, COULD THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE?!_

 

Our 6th period teacher came in with test papers in his hand. He handed them out to us and we all sat quietly as we take the test. I sighed in frustration as I skim through the paper, convinced that I won't be able to answer any of this.

 

AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT.

 

Our teacher, Mr. Lee, walked past me and stepped back. He stood on my side, staring at my desk.

I looked at him, all confused and scared.

He grabbed something below my desk, where we have a storage to place our books and stuff, "WHAT IS THIS?!"

All eyes are on me. I froze in shock when I realized what Mr. Lee was holding.

 

It was a piece of paper, notes written all over it that's most likely covered in the exam.

 

I'm so close to crying.  _Why did I have that paper under my desk? Who put it there? I may not have studied for today's exam because of what happened last night, but I will never cheat!_

My chest is about to explode because of shame and confusion, "Mr. Lee, I don't---"

"You are cheating, Nica!" he shouted.

 

 

 

_I wished today was just another day at school._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's going down for real. Tan tan tananan tan... Idk what the tune is im sorry


	6. Everything's Falling Apart

 

I have never been to the Principal's office before.

Growing up, getting into trouble is a Yoongi-oppa thing. _It's not because he's a problem child,_ but out of the 3 of us, he's the fearless one because once he sets his mind on something, _no matter how dangerous or stupid or pointless it may be_ , he'll do it. This trait of him is one of the things that I love and admire about my oldest brother.

Being the youngest and only girl, I think in a way I pressured myself to not give my parents any worries. My mom and dad always struggled with our family's finances, -- paying for our house's mortgage, groceries, ulitily bills, phone bills, all of our tuition fees , etc. -- and it kills me everytime my dad would need to work extra hours just to make sure we'd get by.

Yoongi-oppa helps the family in the best way he can. Since he turned 18 this year, he got a part-time job at a fastfood near our school and he would work there on weekends and sporadic Friday nights. He tells me that sometimes he also goes to "gigs that I don't really know much about" where he gets paid. All of his paychecks goes to our mom.

Namjoon-oppa, on the other hand, alleviates my parents' stress by his academic excellence. He is the smartest out of the 3 of us -- straight A's since preschool (no kidding, he eats books for breakfast), junior Vice President of the Linguistics AND Science Club, and I'm pretty sure that he's gonna be the class Valedictorian when he graduates 2 years from now.

Me, the youngest, is the precious one. I am the princess of our castle, and a princess that would always be innocent and loving and graceful.

A princess who should NEVER be in fights. A princess who should NEVER cause any problems or worries to the family. A princess who should NEVER make his older brothers worry. A princess who should NEVER be caught cheating on her exams.

Before I used to think that I may not be as smart as Namjoon-oppa or as skillful as Yoongi-oppa, but atleast I am the kindest one. I never, _EVER, not in a million years,_ would upset my parents. This is the best thing I could offer this family. This is the only thing I could give back to my parents for all the hardwork they've been doing for us.

 

So imagine how hard I am crying right now while waiting outside the Principal's office. _I'm not even crying; I am sobbing like a freakin' whale._ My eyes are so puffy and hot from all the tears that had left in them and I can't even breathe properly.

This is so unfair. What makes everything worse is, I didn't do it. I WOULD NEVER CHEAT.  Never. My parents taught me well.

 

_I wish I could just vanish like thin air._

 

Just as I was about to have a breakdown again, I noticed a shadow near my feet.

When I looked up, it was Jimin with a water bottle and handkerchief on his hands.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, in between helpless sobs. My voice is a little hoarse. _Yuck._

He sat beside me and handed me the water bottle, "It's break time. I just came to check on you. How are you doing?"

"Jimin, I --" Just before I finished my sentence, I can't help but sob like a baby again. Jimin slowly reached for my shoulder and gave me a warm side hug. His touch made me feel so much better, but I still can't stop myself from crying.

"I know. You don't have to say anything. I know you didn't do it. I trust you." Jimin wiped my tears away with his handkerchief and placed his chin on the top of my head. I burried my face on his chest.

"I am so sorry. I know this has been hard for you." He whispered to my ear.

"Everyone hates me. You hate me. Taehyung hates me. Jungkook hates me way before last night. I hate myself." I ranted.

Jimin rubbed my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze, "Hey, I don't hate you. That's never gonna happen." Then he gave a soft peck on the top of my head, "I'm just worried about you."

"I'm sorry." I whimpered. _I salute Jimin for not laughing at me because I swear I look so ugly right now._

He touched my hair, played with it as I sank more deeply into his chest,  "Everything's going to be okay. The truth will come out eventually. Just know that you are never alone. We believe in you."

"I missed you. I felt like I was gonna die when you all gave me the silent treatment. Don't ever do that again. You're all I got in this place." I said, punching Jimin light on the chest.

I sat properly and fix my face. Just in time, the Principal came out of his office and called my name.

Jimin squeezed my cheeks, "You're gonne be fine. Just be honest. Nica, fighting!"

I forced a smile at him. _Having Jimin's support made everything less... horrible._

 

I stood up and slowly walked towards the Principal's office. It was a huge office with lots and lots of filing drawers containing student documents. The Principal, _Mr. Do_ , was already sitting at his sturdy desk, "Nica, right? Have a seat, please."

There were a pair of chairs facing each other in front of Mr. Do's desk. I sat on the chair that was on the left side. When I was seated, Mr. Do opened the folder that was in front of him. It's my student record, apparently.

"Mr. Lee filed a report against you, accusing you of cheating by placing notes under your desk. You know cheating is strictly prohibited in this school, right? It's written in your handbook."

"Mr. Do --" 

 

Suddenly, the door flung open.

 

"Jungkook??" I blinked. _Is he lost? Why is he, of all people, here?_

"Jungkook, is there something I can help you with? Nica and I are discussing some things that you have no business with. Could you wait outside?" Mr. Do said. _Of course our Principal knows Jungkook._ He is the youngest star athlete of our school -- bagging gold medals in marathon, Taekwando, and wrestling. 

"Mr. Principal, with all due respect. I think I need to show you something." Jungkook sat in front of me, a paper and a notebook in his hand.

He placed the piece of paper and the notebook on Mr. Do's desk.

All of a sudden, I recognized that it is MY notebook that he's been holding, "Why did you bring my notebook?"

Jungkook just glanced at me then he looked at Mr. Do again. He cleared his throat, opened my notebook, and said, "Nica is my seatmate, so I know her handwriting. This is clearly NOT her handwriting, Mr. Do." he then pointed at the piece of paper that he was also holding, and it turns out that it's the one that Mr. Lee found under my desk.

Jungkook continued, "The handwriting on these notes are sloppy, and Nica's penmanship is nice. And also..." he turned the paper over, "... it looks like this paper doesn't belong to a student here. See the school name? Nica didn't write this, Sir."

"How can you be so sure? It doesn't really prove anything, Jungkook. She could have changed her writing, and who knows it could be that she has a friend studying in that other school. Besides, even if it's not hers it's still considered cheating if she really used it." Mr. Do replied in complete disbelief.

"Well, I just don't get why Nica would do it. You've seen her spotless records, I suppose. Has she been reported before? Have you talked to our teachers about her?" Jungkook interrogated our Principal like he's a freakin' big-shot prosecutor.

Mr. Do looked confused, "What are you saying? Nica, care to explain?"

They both looked at me. I froze for a moment.

Jungkook held my hand that's on my lap, "I think it's time to tell someone, Nica. Please. You've been bearing with this for the longest time. Enough is enough."

"Tell me what?" Mr. Do asked again, shifting his eyes bewteen Jungkook and I.

Jungkook squeezed my hand tightly. I looked at him and he smiled at me warmly. I let out a heavy sigh and said, "My classmates... my girl classmates have been bullying me since the day I entered this school. I think it's because of the fact that I hang out with Jungkook and the others a lot, and they were all kind of..."

"Jealous about it? I clearly see how popular Jungkook's peer group is." Mr. Do finished my sentence.

Jungkook got his phone from his pocket, played a video, and gave it to the Principal, "I took that video almost a month ago. We were in PE class and you can clearly see the girls picking on her."

I can't see the video but I hear voices and some shouting.

Jungkook spoke again, "I know Nica would get mad at me if I report this, but I just can't sit back and look away while she's being bullied by these girls. If I had it my way, I would have hit those girls back just to get even. Of course I'm not gonna do that because that's not how my mother raised me."

I added, "Mr. Do, I... I don't feel safe in here. This school was supposed to be a place where I could learn and make new friends, but I don't get to do that with all of these girls picking on me everytime I breathe. You've watched the video, and I'm sure that it's enough proof that I'm not making anything up. I've been bullied countless times, but I chose not to report this to you or to anyone not because I want this to happen or I'm scared of these girls, but because I don't want my parents to worry. That's the ultimate reason why I'm bearing with all of this. I love them and I would do anything to lessen their stress. They have so much on their plate already. Getting into trouble would be the last thing I'd do, and what Mr. Lee has accused me completely contradicts with this. I would swear on all things that are holy, that I did NOT cheat on that test."

Mr. Do was quiet for a minute. Then he looked at my folder and wrote something on it.

I looked at Jungkook, who was already staring at me, his doe-like eyes worried.

When Mr. Do was done writing, he faced me and said, "Now... I am so sorry that our school was not able to protect you. Bullying is a grave offense in this school, as you must know, and it saddens me that you are a victim of it. I will hold a meeting for all of our teachers and also with our school administrators regarding this. I can't believe your teachers let this happen in class hours! We will come up with new rules and ways to avoid this from ever happening again. I will also call out your classmates' parents ---"

I cut him off, "No...no no. No need, Mr. Do."

"This has to stop right now, Nica. Tolerating them means still giving them power over you. Nobody deserves to be treated like how they treat you. It's not your fault that handsome guys all want to hang out with you." Mr. Do then winked at Jungkook, making him giggle, "Anyway, as for Mr. Lee's report, I can't really let you off the hook just because you told me you didn't do it. The notes were still found under your desk. However, I will tell him to just give you a make-up exam and extra assignments for compensation, instead of failing you."

"Oh my gosh, thank you, Mr. Do! Thank you!" I felt relieved with his words that I ended up crying again, this time because of happiness.

Mr. Do smiled at me, "Thank your lawyer boyfriend, too." he said, pointing at Jungkook.

My eyes widened, "We... I... He... I am not... We are not dating."

Mr. Do chuckled, looking at our intertwined hands, _oh my goodness we're still holding each other's hands IN FRONT OF OUR PRINCIPA_ L, "Your hands say otherwise."

I let go of Jungkook's hand swiftly. Jungkook scratched his head and stared at the ceiling in embarrassment.

"It's okay. I allow hand-holding. _Just_ hand-holding. I was a teenager once, too." Mr. Do said warmly, _and yes_ , he emphasized the word _just._

I changed the topic, _I am so embarrassed right now that I feel like my hair is turning red from all the blushing,_ "Mr. Do... thank you again. For everything."

"You're welcome, Nica." Mr. Do let out a huge smile on his face that turned all my worries about this situation away.

 

Jungkook and I stood up and left the Principal's office. We were both silent as we walk in the corridors. I have so many things to say him right now, mostly about how grateful I am to him for backing me up earlier, but I can't make any words in my head. I don't know if it's because of all the crying I did today or because I'm not used to talking to him. Maybe both.

We faced each other, almost at the same time. When we realized that, we both turned away.

"Jungkook, I just want to say thank you. If you didn't come by Mr. Do's office, I would be in so much trouble." Before I even knew it, I was crying again.

 

What happened today made me realize that I was not really okay for the longest time, that I was just holding it together and ignoring everything that it snowballed and hit me solidly in the face. 

 

Jungkook slouched, meeting my eyes, "Hey, don't cry. It's done. You're okay."

"I was so scared earlier that I swear I wish I was dead." I know this is a nasty thing to say, but it's the truth. I was so pressured and angry and confused and scared that I thought it'd be easier to just cease to exist.

He pouted, "Please don't say things like that." he smacked me in the head gently, "I can't afford to lose you."

"Oh yeah? Then why aren't you talking to me? What seems to be your reason?" It was too late when I realized that I shouldn't have asked his stupid question. The mentally and emotionally stable me would just let it slide or pretend that she didn't hear what Jungkook just said because _honestly how would you respond to that statement?_

"It's because Taehyung, Jimin and I ---" Jungkook stopped himself mid-sentence, like he was caught red-handed or something, "Sh*t."

Without saying another word, he walked away from me. 

"Ya! Jeon Jungkook! Where are you going?!" I screamed. I ran to catch up to him.

"I'm going home." he replied coldly. _It looks like we are back to not-talking mode again._

"Hey, I can't keep doing this. I'm done." I said, in an irritated tone.  _One second ago he was like a prince who slayed a dragon to save me and now he's back to being Jungcocky again?_

Jungkook stopped walking so I did too. He faced me.

I spoke again, "If... If you can't..." _damn it, I'm stuttering!_ I cleared my throat, "If you really can't afford to lose me, then act like it. I am so thankful to have you as a friend and it makes me so sad to see how easy it is for you to just ignore me whenever you want. You are one of the reasons why I remain strong even if my life is slowly falling apart, so please. Talk to me."

Jungkook quickly threw his arms tightly around me, catching me off-guard, "I'm sorry. I'm just not good with... this stuff."

 

I honestly have no idea what he's talking about. All I know is his warm arms feel so good around me. _It's like a hot pack on a cold, winter night._

 

He let go almost instantly, scratching his head again, "Just... don't get in trouble again, okay? You make us all worry."

We continued to walk again. We still need to get back to class. "I'm sorry. For making you all worry last night. Yoongi-oppa told me that you stayed outside our house waiting for me. Is that true or is he overreacting again?" 

Jungkook blushed, "I was just making sure that you got home safely. Jimin and Taehyung were worried too, you know. We couldn't study for the exams, so we might need to do the make up exam too." He chuckled, "Anyway, did you know Hobi-hyung even went on Google for hours trying to find ways how to track your cell? He was..."

 

Jungkook went on and on about what they were all doing last night while they wait for me to come home. It made me more guilty than I already am, but, in a way, it made me feel better as well. Obviously not because I want them all to suffer, but because 1.) Jungkook's talking to me again, and 2.) I finally came to realize that they all really love and care for me. That I will never be alone.

 

_Being a teenager in a school full of bullies and nights that I can't even remember may be hard, but I am never alone._

 

\-------

After class, I asked the boys if we could all go to the diner in front of our school for milkshakes. I thought of treating them for all the pain I've caused them last night. I asked Jennie to come with us, but for some weird reason, she refused, telling me she has an emergency and came running as soon as the bell rang for dismissal.

Upon reaching the diner, we merged 2 long tables so we could all sit together.

As soon as everyone was settled on their seats [Jungkook, Jin-oppa, Namjoon-oppa, and Yoongi-oppa sat on one side, their backs on the counter, while Taehyung, Jimin, Hobi-oppa, and I sat on the opposite side], Namjoon-oppa asked the waitress for some menus. While the others were picking out their milkshake flavors, Jin-oppa started complaining, "I am not prepared for our Calculus exam tomorrow, Yoongi. I really want to punch Kangin for convincing Ms. Park to move it tomorrow."

Yoongi-oppa shook his head, "He is so full of himself."

Hobi-oppa whispered, like this Kangin was sitting beside our table, "Are you talking about the same Kangin who wrecked the dance studio? Damn, I want to punch him too."

 

_Oh, does violence really come with age? Poor Kangin._

 

Taehyung handed the menu to me, "Which flavor do you like?"

I skimmed through the milkshake menu, "Hmmm... just the plain chocolate, maybe. Which one did you pick? No, don't answer that... Strawberry?"

Taehyung grinned at me and nodded. Of course he'll order Strawberry. Taehyung loves every strawberry-flavored food and beverage there is. He is the cutest when he eats strawberries.

Then I faced Jimin, who was on my other side, "Then for our Jiminie... I'm gonna guess what you'll order... Hmmm.... you like chocolates too, but -- chocolate cherry! Am I right? You always say that plain chocolate is boring."

"Our Nica knows me well." Jimin pinched my cheek as he smiled cutely at me, his eyes shaped into a pair of crescent moons again.

"Of course I do." I shrugged. I looked at the menu again, "For Jungkookie, he loves banana AND chocolates, so I guess banana fudge is his order." I said, confidently.

Jungkook shook his head. Jimin and Taehyung both said "Wooohh..." at the same time.

"You lost your touch, Nica." Namjoon-oppa said, making a "tsk" sound.

"Wait! I could do this. I know what you like!" I said, skimming through the menu again.

"YOU know what I LIKE? Sure." Jungkook replied with a smirk, his voice suddenly at bit... _alluring?_ Honestly, I really don't know what he's thinking half of the time.

I shrugged it off, _I may be hearing or interpreting things differently due to stress and exhaustion_ , "Oh, yes! I missed something." I cleared my throat and closed the menu then pointed at Jungkook, "You want banana fudge BUT with extra whip cream and milk and chocolate shavings on top."

Jungkook, being so extra, nodded, and clapped his hands, "You... are correct. YOU JUST WON 1 MILLION DOLLARS!"

We all laughed together and my chest started to feel so warm. The past 48 hours have been so shitty and it's nice to finally have a sit down with my boys, just laughing and talking.

When our laughter vanished, I finally said while trying so hard not to cry _again_ , "I just want to say that I'm so sorry for making you worry last night. It won't happen again."

_The boys all smiled at me, and if I could just capture this moment using my eyes as a camera, I totally would._

I resumed my heartfelt message, "I won't do it again, I promise. Thank you for looking out for me. I thought having 2 brothers is hard work, but having 5 more... it's actually comforting."

Yoongi-oppa said, "We all love you, Nica." Now being the _tsundere_ that he is, he stood up and said, "C'mmon now, we should order! No more sappy words to each other. I think Nica would be crying any minute again if this continues on."

Jin-oppa corrected him, "No, Yoongi. _You_ will be crying if this continues on." 

 

Yoongi-oppa made a face. We all burst out laughing.

 

"Whatever, _Hyung_. Be thankful you're older than me because I swear if you weren't, I would have hit you." Yoongi-oppa said, still pouting.

"I hit Jin-hyung all the time." Jungkook -- the youngest out of all of us -- said with pride and confidence. _Serioursly, he's proud of hitting Jin-oppa?_

Yoongi-oppa defended, "It's because I still have respect for elders, Kookie."

Namjoon-oppa then said, "You're a lot more talkative today, Jungkook-ah. Something happened?"

Jungkook and I looked at each other and smiled.

"Nothing, Hyung. I'm just happy that Nica is safe and she's with us now." Jungkook responded.

"If you are really happy, come order with us then. Nica, let's go." Yoongi-oppa said.

Jungkook and I stood up. Before going to the counter, I repeated their orders, "Okay, chocolate for me, strawberry for TaeTae, chocholate cherry for Chim, Joonie-oppa, what's your order again?"

"Uhmm... I want the Strawberry Cheesecake." Namjoon-oppa replied.

"Jin-oppa?" I asked.

"I want _you_." Jin-oppa sent finger hearts my way then he laughed out loud.

I blushed. _I don't have time for this right now, Jin-oppa! Stop making my heart beat so fast! Honestly._

Hobi-oppa sneered at Jin-oppa, "Nica has been scarred for life, Hyung. Nica, ignore her." Then he looked at me, "I want the capuccino. Thank you, Nicaaaa!" He tells me, acting all cute.  _He makes me giggle all the time._

Jin-oppa stopped laughing and told me, "I'll get a Mocha. Thank you for the treat, Nica." 

"You're welcome, Oppa." I replied, sending finger hearts on his way like he did to me earlier. Jin-oppa laughed again, his ears turned red.

 

_I made my longtime crush laugh. OMG._

 

Jungkook, Yoongi-oppa and I all went to the counter to order. While waiting in line, I recognize someone sitting by the counter next to the cashier. I thought I was hallucinating at first, _but nope..._

 

"Sehun is here." I whispered to myself. I panicked right out, but kept my cool 'cause Yoongi-oppa and Jungkook have no idea who he is. 

"Did you say something?" asked Jungkook.

I shook my head excessively, " _Anya, anya._.. uhm... Yoongi-oppa, what's your order?"

Yoongi-oppa looked at the menu board posted on top of the cashier, "I might try the peach milkshake."

The group in front of us was done ordering so we walked towards the till. I shifted my position with Jungkook to avoid Sehun from seeing me.

_He is literally half an inch away from Yoongi-oppa right now. Why is this diner designed this way? Customers shouldn't be sitting next to the cashier!_

My internal organs are all screaming in terror right now. _Eotteokhe?_

 

Sehun's with his classmates, I guess. They are all wearing the same uniform. I recognize some of them, maybe they're at the party last night too.

"I'll be right with you. I just have to help prepare some orders." The cashier told us.

"Okay." Yoongi-oppa said.

 

_Andwae!!! Take our orders first, Miss. Please! We need to be away from Sehun as much as possible!!!!_

Suppressing all of this panic is making me lightheaded. I feel like throwing up.

As we were waiting to order, we could hear Sehun's voice, "....I swear Bro, she was so hot! She was just but the way she moved on the dance floor... wow. You wouldn't believe she's just 16." 

The much taller guy with round eyes beside him then asked, "Is that who you're with last night? Woah. You really hit it off with her, didn't you?"

 

"Sh*t." I whispered to myself again. Jungkook has bionic hearing so of course he still heard me, "Is everything okay?"

I ignored Jungkook as I was busy eavesdropping Sehun's conversation with his classmates.

Sehun then said, "I did! I wish I could see her again. Last night wasn't enough. If I see her again, I'm gonna show her my moves."

They all laughed.

The tall guy punched Sehun's arm, "Did you even kiss her, man?"

"She was so hammered last night that it would be boring to make a move on her. It's like kissing a pole." said Sehun, you could sense the disappointment in his tone. _Hammered?! I was so hammered last night that I was like a pole?! What the actual f--_

I looked at Yoongi-oppa, who was smirking at himself. Obviously, he's listening to their conversation. _Sorry for swearing too much, but sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t_

Another guy, gray-haired, who was beside the tall guy said, "Do you have a picture of her?"

 

_Please. You don't have a picture of me, right? I don't remember taking a picture with you, Sehun!!!!_

 

Sehun replied, "Oh, wait. I do! Kai sent me this picture."

 

_Yoongi-oppa will kill me. No wait, he will kill Sehun first then he will kill me._

 

"Hey, Nica. Are you sure you're okay? You're sweating so much." Jungkook asked me again.

"I'm not okay." I finally responded. _Sh*t's about to get started._

Jungkook then said, "Why? What happened?" 

 

"ZOOM IN ON HER FACE! I can't see!" said the grey-haired dude.

"Oh, she's cute!" said the tall guy.

"I promise the next time I see her, I'm gonna pound on her like there's no tomorrow." said Sehun, sounding like a freaking maniac.

 

_SHUT THE F*CK UP SEHUN. Yoongi-oppa will have you killed!_

_I am swearing so much today it's not even funny._

 

Jungkook snapped his fingers to get my attention, "Nica, answer me. What happened?"

 

"YOU PIECE OF SH*T. That's my baby sister, you fvcking pervert!" Yoongi-oppa yells, as his fist meets Sehun's face.

 

I said to Jungkook, "That happened." 

 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another cliffhanger. I am so sorry if I'm slow in updating. I'm trying to be better. I've been having writer's block and I'm doing the best I can to lessen it. Thank you for reading! ♥
> 
> Also, please don't hesitate to leave comments. Your comments keep me going and motivate me to write and improve.


	7. In The Clear

_I can't hear properly._

Everything seems like a blur, like I'm riding a carousel that's spinning 10x faster that it makes me want to throw up. 

 

"Nica, is this true?! Do you know this j*ckass?!"

Yoongi-oppa's holding Sehun by the collar of his uniform. My oldest brother is no 6-footer like Sehun, but he is like a terrifying giant when he's angry. Sehun looks mortified as he clasped on my brother's hands, completely stunned and baffled; he has a fresh purple bruise on his cheek from Yoongi-oppa's jab.

 

All eyes are on me right now -- the boys, Sehun, Sehun's classmates, the workers, and even strangers who were happily eating and minding their own business a moment ago -- and I can't help but feel a sharp pain in my chest.

_Is this what it feels like? When time stops?_

Like the world halted for a moment, waiting for my answer.

 

"Nica, who is he?!"

Now it's Jungkook's turn to question me. He got this look on his face that I've never seen before -- a combination of worry, anger and confusion. 

 

Sehun finally came back to his senses, "Let go of me!" He grabbed Yoongi-oppa by his wrists and pushed him away, "What the fvck is wrong with you?!"

Sehun's classmates stood up to his either sides, ready to back him up in case Yoongi-oppa punches him again. The tall guy reminded me of Namjoon-oppa as his big built contradicts his soft features. The guy with the silver-gray hair was equally intimidating even though he is much shorter than Sehun and the tall dude. Honestly, Sehun and his classmates all have charming features, far from the other kids that I see on the streets doing drugs every day. They don't look like they sell weed or cut class or whatever, but they sure look like they are capable of handling themselves in times of danger.

Meanwhile, Hoseok-oppa and Namjoon-oppa walked hurriedly towards us to check what was going on.

"Hyung, what's the matter?" Namjoon-oppa asked.

"Who are these people? Why did you punch him?!" Hoseok-oppa followed up.

 

 _Gahd, I feel so awful. No one, not even me, knows what is exactly going on._  

 

Sehun smirked, "You tell me."

Yoongi-oppa half-stepped towards Sehun, "If you open your mouth one more time, I swear to God I will hit you till you're blind." He attempted to attack Sehun once more, but Namjoon-oppa and Hoseok-oppa both held him by his arms.

Sehun then looked at me, his pupils widened as he recognized who I was, "You're --"

Jungkook automatically wrapped his arm around me tightly upon noticing Sehun's stare at me. I looked up at Jungkook and he has this fierce look on his eyes, fixed at Sehun, "She's off limits."

 

Sweat is coming out on every pore in my body. My stomach's churning. My heart's beating like crazy. I feel like I'm stuck in a mafia movie wherein 2 gangs are about to break into a fight and kill each other with their own fists. 

 

 _This is all because of me._  I need to fix this.

 

I swallowed the big lump on my throat and stood in between Sehun and Yoongi-oppa, facing the latter,  "Oppa, I know him."

Yoongi-oppa was shocked to the core.  _I don't blame him_ ,  "You know this fvcker?! HOW--"

"I'll explain everything later once I've sorted everything out. Can I talk to him in private?" I asked him calmly.

My boys looked perplexed by my words. I spoke again, "Please. Just trust me. We all need to calm down. We are in a public place, and we are disturbing other people right now."

Yoongi-oppa glowered at Sehun again. I held his hand, squeezed it lightly and looked him in the eye, "Oppa. Please."

Yoongi-oppa sighed, "Fine."

I smiled at him, "Thank you."

I looked at the lady at the cashier and bowed to her, "I am so sorry for causing a scene. We'll be on our way." She looked scared to death but she managed to force a smile at me and let us be.

Then I finally faced Sehun, "I need to talk to you."

Sehun looked puzzled, too. I think he's as clueless as I am to this whole situation, but he followed me anyway when I started walking towards the corner of the diner.

The boys and Sehun's friends followed us, but I stopped them, "Stop following us! We need to talk in private."

The tall guy quickly said, "We know. We're just --"

Namjoon-oppa continued his sentence, "We'll be sitting nearby if you need anything."

Jungkook added, "I just want to know that you're okay."

"I am okay. Sehun's not gonna do anything to me. We're just gonna talk." I said.

"Well, I want to see how this fvcker talks to you with my own eyes. I don't think I'm ever gonna leave you alone with him after what he said about you earlier." Yoongi-oppa responded.

He has a point so I didn't argue anymore. 

 

After hearing Yoongi-oppa, the tall guy and the grey-haired dude finally realized that it was me whom they were talking about before he punched Sehun. The tall guy hit Sehun's back and pointed at me, "She --- she was... She was... her?!" His eyes were wide and he has this comical look on his face. The silver-haired boy kicked Sehun on his ankle which made him shout, "Stupid. No wonder he punched you!"

"Stop hitting me already!" Sehun yelled.

"Oh, believe me, I'm really trying my hardest not to." Jungkook said to him.

"Are you gonna fight again?! Please, just stop." _How many times should I need to break them up? Why are boys so... intense?_

Hoseok-oppa finally meddled and said, " _Ya,_ guys. Stop this right now. Here's what we're gonna do: Sehun and Nica are gonna sit at the corner and we're all gonna sit a few tables away from them -- far enough to give them privacy and near enough to kick the hell out of this blondie's ass should he ever lay one finger on Nica. Okay?"

Everyone seemed to agree with him as nobody said anything so we all continued walking.

Sehun and I sat on the end corner of the diner, near the restrooms. Sehun's friends sat 3 tables away from us, right beside where the boys' table were. Few minutes later, Jimin and Taehyung sat there as well. Namjoon-oppa filled them in about what was happening. I don't know what he told them, but Jimin and Taehyung looked confused and angry as soon as he was finished talking.

 

_Gahd, I've never felt so stressed and uncomfortable in my life._

 

I tried to ignore the boys and focus on Sehun. I need answers, and he is the person who might make me remember what really happened last night, "I am so sorry. The guy who punched you, he's my brother. He heard you saying... nasty things about me. Actually we all heard you."

He turned red and covered his face in embarrassment, "Fck, I'm so sorry..." He looked at me.

"Oh, uhm...Nica. My name is Nica."  I said.

"Nica. I'm so sorry, Nica. I have no excuse." Sehun replied. He looks really apologetic and embarrassed, and I thought for a second that he's kinda... _cute._

 

_Enough adding people to your crush list, Nica._

_FOR PETE'S SAKES HE'S A PERVERT. WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU? FOCUS!_

 

I wanna strangle myself sometimes.

 

I cleared my head and asked him, "Anyway... I hope you could help me remember. I have no idea what happened last night. Jennie said I was with you the whole time?" 

Sehun smiled, "I'm not surprised that you can't remember anything. You were really drunk last night."

I furrowed my eyebrows, "How was that possible? I don't drink so I don't really know what my tolerance is, but I only had one tequila shot and that's the last thing I remembered. Everything else was a blur. One of my friends found me lying in front of a coffee shop hours later."

Sehun blinked, "Oh dear." He stared at me for the longest time, but I can see that he's not really _looking_ at me. He's thinking.

"What?!" Sehun is making me nervous with his stare. He knows something.

Sehun then said, "Fck, that's why you were all over me last night! You were so clingy and wild. You danced and danced and danced until I had to literally carry you away from the dance floor. I was with you the whole time 'cause I can't find Jennie anywhere and you had no one else with you. I had a really great time with you but I knew something was off. Jennie came back right before the party ended, saying she's taking you home. I didn't see you again after that."

I didn't say anything. I was trying to remember everything.

He spoke again, "Who gave you that tequila shot? Do you remember? 'Cause I don't think tequila made you act like that. Someone might have put _something_ on that shot."

"Something?" I repeated.

 

Sehun stared at me again.

Someone put _something_ on my shot?

 _Something_ that would make me feel energetic and clingy and wild and high?

 

**_HIGH._ **

 

When I finally realized what he meant, I had goosebumps all over my body,  "Like drugs?! NO WAY. Oh my Goodness." 

Sehun nodded, "Someone drugged you last night, Nica."

 

 

I felt numb.

Someone drugged me last night, and what makes is worse is, _I exactly know who that someone is._

 

 

I stood up, "Thank you, Sehun. For being with me last night and not taking advantage." Before I leave the table, I threw one last look at him, "But... to be honest, I'm not really sorry that my brother punched you in the face for saying those things to me."

I rushed to the boys' table.

Yoongi-oppa goes hysterical again, "What?! Am I allowed to punch that dude again? Don't tell me he's your boyfriend?!"

I replied, "Oppa, can you please chill? I'm so, so, sorry for making you all worry. I just... I don't know how to explain this..."

"I was with Nica last night at the party." Sehun interrupted. I didn't realize he was standing behind me. 

Taehyung pulled me to his side, away from Sehun.

"Honestly, dude... Can you fvck off? Can't you see we're talking here?" Yoongi-oppa's starting to lose it again.

 

Then everyone started talking all at once. Even Sehun's classmates barged in to support him.

My ears can't take it anymore. They were so loud and combative and I just can't take it anymore. The amount of conflict that I had experienced and witnessed today is more than enough to last a lifetime. _Do all 16-year-old girls experience this?_

 

I raised my voice, "Can you all shut up for 1 minute and let me talk or do you want me to take you all to an empty parking lot so you could just kill each other?!"

 

Everybody shushed.

I shook my head, "Listen. I met Sehun last night at the party that I went to with Jennie. The same party that turned my life upside down. I can't recall a thing, he just told me what happened, end of story. He is NOT my boyfriend. Now everything's clear to me, and I need to deal with something. So... can we all just go home?"

Taehyung then asked me, "One more question: Did this guy take advantage of you last night or something?"

It took me a moment to answer, "I..."

Jimin, who was sitting the closest to Sehun, was about to reach for him. He yelled, "You --" but then Sehun shouted, "God NO! NO! I did NOT make a move on her! Can you all relax?! Nica, I don't think you will ever find a husband. These boys are so ready to murder anyone who comes near you."

 

 

 _Yeah..._ and I might want to murder someone too.

I'm kidding, I wouldn't really murder _her._

I want to, though.

 

 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, It was kinda obvious who did it. Nica just can't admit it to herself. Not yet.
> 
>  
> 
> PS: Thank you for your comments! I appreciate them. Keep 'em coming please! ♥


	8. Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't really know exactly how this story progressed from being the fluffiest of fluffs to... this. I am shocked myself. Lol please love me still. Anyway, here you go!
> 
> *jumps off a cliff*
> 
> *actually has a parachute*

 

Sehun and his friends went home rather hurriedly and awkwardly, even contemplating to say goodbye to us before leaving. I think they are actually nice guys; it's just too bad that we crossed paths at the wrong time and for all the wrong reasons.

Just before the boys and I head home ourselves, they lined up in front of me like cadet officers right outside the diner. They all look so worried and pissed off and confused and tired from everything that has happened since yesterday. I am a wreck myself, but I'm trying my hardest not to let them know that I'm in the verge of breaking down any minute as I don't want them to worry, atleast not more than they already do.

 

 _I'm sick of this._ I don't want anyone to worry about me. Not my parents, not my brothers, not my friends. 

 

 ** _I made a mistake._** I was so desperate to find a girl friend in school to compensate for the bullying that I've been through, thinking that it's the only thing that would make me feel like I'm myself again. I was always around girls for almost half of my life, and when I entered high school my world drastically changed. Suddenly I became this lone girl who got bullied by all of her girl classmates for hanging out with the "coolest" boys in campus.

 

_Like, how stupid is that?!_

 

I miss the feeling of having a girl friend, and so when Jennie came... I became so attached to her. She reminded me of my old life -- the one that didn't involve boys, or girls bullying girls, or trying to fit in.

Jennie made me feel like I've got a friend in her, like I could trust her, _and so I did._

Now I've realized that _that_ was the problem. I was _too_ attached to her that I became _too_ trusting. I missed a lot of signs: the way she'd always subtly tell me to not hang out with the boys or do anything school-related ( _"Let's have some girl time, just you and me! You can hang out with them later." "Are you sure you want to sit with them? Let's sit at the other table." "Let's go to the mall first! That homework can wait!_ "), or that one time that she ignored me the whole day when Taehyung bought me breakfast, or when she got super pissy at me when Taehyung lent me his uniform because someone threw chocolate milk on me...

 

She was like a friend to me. She was nice. She even defended me when I was being bullied. She made me think that my life has not changed after all.

 

_Or so I thought._

 

 

"Is there anything we could do for you, Nica?" Jimin finally spoke.

I was looking down and intently avoiding their gaze, gripping tightly at the straps of my backpack. I just nodded, eyes still on the concrete pavement because I swear I'm gonna sob like a little kid  _again_ if I ever look any one of them in the eye, "I just want to go home. I'm tired."

Taehyung held me by the shoulders and gently rubbed them, "Are you sure?"

I replied with a fake but supposedly convincing smile, eyes still low, "Let's go home. It's been a long day." I then sighed and raised my head.  _Nica, don't cry. You've done enough crying today,_ "Since you're all here, I just want to say that I'm so sorry. The last thing I wanted was to make you guys worry about me. I am fine, really. I'm just tired and I guess I still have hangover from last night so I'm dying to sleep." I even faked a chuckle to spice up my acting, "Thank you for being here. For everything. I wouldn't have survived yesterday and today without you, guys."

Hoseok-oppa, smiled sheepishly at me and said, "I wish we could have done more for you, Nica. I hate seeing you suffer and not being able to do anything." His smile was still bright, but his eyes were sad and wary.

Even my Mr. Sunshine and Good Vibes is feeling down today because of me. _Ugh._

 _God, tears. Tears are coming!!!_ I turned my back on them and started walking away to shake my nerves and force myself not to cry. When I felt like I'm composed enough, I faced them, "You've done enough. Now, let's go home. See you tomorrow." I sniffed, forcing liquids back to my eyes and nose if possible, and smiled at them.

They didn't argue anymore. It's either my acting made them believe that I'm really fine and that they don't have to worry about you _or_ my acting was so bad that they just let me be. Or maybe they are just too tired to deal with me altogether.

Namjoon and Yoongi-oppa followed me, and the others said their goodbyes and went on their way.

I was silent the whole time we were walking home. I maintained two paces behind my brothers who were busy talking about stuff that I don't really know about and was too distracted to even pay attention. _I think it's about a rap battle of some sort?_ From time to time they would ask me random things and I would just nod or smile and occasionally answer.

When we got home, I rushed to my room and locked the door. I quickly changed into my pajamas and laid on my bed. I also turned off my phone so no one could disturb me as I need silence to process everything.

My brothers both knocked and asked if I needed anything, but I ignored them and just pretended that I was sleeping. I didn't even bother going downstairs to get something to eat as I don't feel like eating.

 

_I don't feel anything, to be honest._

 

Today, _to state the obvious_ , has been the worst day of my life. I woke up with the worst hangover (Is it still called a hangover even if it's _not_ the result of drinking too much _alcohol_?), my brothers and guy friends got mad at me and gave me the silent treatment all morning because of it, I got called to the Principal's office for alleged cheating and I almost failed that subject if it wasn't for Jungkook who came and saved me, we almost got reported for making a scene at the diner because Yoongi-oppa just punched a complete stranger --  _which is not really a stranger because I actually met him and sadly flirted with him last night --_ and to top it all off, I just found out that I got drugged at that same ~~_damn_ ~~ night.

 

**_Jennie drugged me last night._ **

 

There. I freaking said it.

When Sehun told me that it can't be alcohol who made me that wild and clueless last night, my knees started shaking. 

I only had one drink the entire night, and I wasn't really planning on drinking anything because we have that test the day after and my brothers would kill me if they knew that I was out drinking with strangers in a party that I didn't even know who organized.

 

_But then Jennie convinced me to drink._

 

I was completely conscious when she handed me that "tequila shot". She had left me for a while after telling me that she saw a friend that she needed to say hi to, and so I was standing awkwardly by the edge of the dance floor looking all confused and obviously out of place. When she came back, she had shot glasses on her hands. She then told me to drink up and I was hesitant to have it at first 'cause _hello I just turned 16 and I've never had a drink in my life_   _and what if I'm really allergic to alcohol and something bad happen?_ but she told me "it's just a drink" _,_ that "everyone drinks when there's a party" and I'm 16 **_already_**  so it's okay and "I need to trust her on this."

 

_And so I did._

I trusted her.

 

I can still picture the smile on her face when I took the shot glass on his right hand and drank the blue, bitter liquid that was in it.

That evil smile of hers was the last thing that I completely remember before everything went blank.

 

 

 _Why would she do that?_ We were friends, right? She was the only girl friend I have in school and I stood up for her when the boys clearly told me that they hated her. I even got mad at them because of her!

It doesn't make sense. Jennie has been nothing but a sweet friend to me. What have I done wrong, _so wrong_ , that she dragged me to that god-forsaken party and drugged me? 

We're in high school! High school students are expected to sleep in class, take too long on breaks, be late for school, cut classes, pull pranks on each other, avoid doing homework, and a lot of other things.

BUT TO PUT A DATE RAPE DRUG ON YOUR CLASSMATE'S DRINK?! Absolutely **_freaking_** not.

 

I thought she was different from the bullies in my class. Turns out, she was worse.

I suppose my existence is such a bother to her and the other girls in my class that they'd do absolutely _anything_ to get rid of me.

 

I felt sick to my stomach after processing everything that had happened ever since I went to my brothers' school.

Various emotions -- mostly anger and self-pity -- hit me like huge tidal waves. I cried for hours, until my chest felt numb that I felt like suffocating. 

 

I eventually fell asleep 2 hours before my alarm went off.

 

 

* * *

 

The next day, I was so ready to confront Jennie once and for all, but she didn't come to class. _Great._

I tried calling her multiple times on both our lunch and afternoon breaks, but she's not answering. _Maybe Sehun told her that I know what she did and she's not ready to face me or something. Ugh._

Anyway, I don't exactly know how I survived any of my classes. My mind's still a mess; I'm running on 2 hours of sleep, my eyes are puffy that I can't see properly and my chest hurts every time I breathe. Most of the time, I would just stare at the blackboard and pretend to listen to my teachers just so I don't get called in recitation (I've learned over the years that teachers don't call "attentive" students to recite. They love shaming the ones who were either inattentive or sleeping).

Chim, Kookie and Tae made an effort to cheer me up (Jungkook, _believe it or not_ , even showed me his breakdancing skills to get a response out of me), but they failed. They all stopped trying after lunch break and just expressed their concern by throwing sad glances at me then sighed to themselves _literally_ every 5 minutes.

 

_It made me feel even worse._

 

Speaking of lunch break, I just sat quietly and played with my food the whole time. I didn't really feel like eating nor talking nor even existing. Jin-oppa made an attempt to feed me (I blushed real hard when he did it, but I still refused) and Hoseok-oppa even bought me my favorite chocolate milkshake (he illegally went outside the school premises for this, _goodness_ ) but I turned him down, too.

My brothers were surprisingly quiet, even on our way to school earlier. I reckon that maybe they are giving me space to think and breathe, as that's what they usually do ever since we were kids.

 

Lunch hour ended with all of us sitting silently at our usual spot. 

_Again, it made me feel worse that I already do._

 

 

On the other hand, the girls in my class had the maturity to leave me alone today and not play tricks on me during PE. I guess I looked so pathetic that bullying me doesn't satisfy them anymore.

OR

Maybe they got the Principal's memo about yesterday?

 

Honestly, I don't care what the reason is. I'm just thankful that they don't bother me anymore. I have so many things on my plate right now; I got no time to spare to deal with them.

 

After 8 hours of pure mental and emotional torture, dismissal came...

"Nica, I really, really, _really_  need to pee. We'll wait for you at the school gate?" Taehyung asked. He was swaying from side to side, hands on his... _you know_  while talking.

He looks so funny! His face was all crumpled from the discomfort that I managed to smile a little. _He really need to go_ , "Sure, Tae. I'm just gonna finish packing up."

Jungkook then said to me, "Do you want me to wait for you?" He wore his backpack and was ready to go.

I shook my head, "I may be a while, sorry. Why don't you come with Tae and Chim? Wait for me at the gate."

"Okay." Jungkook smiled at me and headed towards the door.

"C'mon guys! I really need to pee!!!! See you at the gate, Nica!" Taehyung grabbed Jungkook's arm and came running like a crazy man.

Jimin laughed while shaking his head, "That's his fault for drinking too much strawberry juice." Before he left to follow the two, he asked me, "Do you want to grab some ice cream later, Nica?"

Before I can answer him, my phone rang, "Uhm... Sure Jimin."

"Yay! See you at the gate." Jimin smiled and left.

 

I then answered my phone, "Hello?"

/Nica, it's me./

 

_Jennie._

 

My heart started beating fast. It's not the same as compared to when Jin-oppa smiles at me or Jungkook looks at me; this is because of panic. _And anger. And betrayal_ , "Where are you? We need to talk. I know what you did, Jennie. Why? Why would you do that? I thought we were friends!"

 

/Meet me at the stock room near the gymnasium at 7pm. I'll tell you why./

 

Then she hung up.

 

I don't know why, _of all places_ , Jennie chose the stock room to meet me. We have this old, dusty stock room near the gymnasium that's full of old books and armchairs. Everyone can enter that room 'cause the door is never locked.

_Whatever, atleast she finally had the guts to face me._

It's not until 6pm, so I finished packing my things and waited for my 3 musketeers at the school gate.

 

When we finished eating ice cream, Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung were suddenly in a hurry to leave.

"Where are you guys going?" I asked them. I'm really curious because they're acting weird and fidgety. _Do they need to pee again?_

All 3 answered at the same time: Jimin shouted, "Home!"; Jungkook yelled, "Basketball!"; Taehyung screamed, "Computer!"

They glared at each other. _What is up?_

I then said, "Jimin, why are you walking on that direction? Your house is on the opposite way. Jungkook, you're not really into basketball right? Taehyung... I have nothing to say to you. You always play computer games after class."

Jimin elbowed Jungkook, "Yes... We were actually gonna play computer games with V. I was about to go home but then --"

Jungkook cut him off, "When we were in the bathroom, Taehyung said we should go play games after eating ice cream. I thought we were gonna go play ball when he meant..." he air-quoted with his fingers, " ...'play.' I was wrong." Then he laughed nervously while scratching his head.

"Can I come with you then?" I asked. I think I still have enough time before I meet with Jennie. I want to distract myself for a bit.

"NO!!!" They all yelled at me in chorus.

Taehyung then said, "You can't come because.... 'cause we are NOT only playing computer games at the shop." he threw a look at the other two, "Right?! Right?!"

I creased my brows, "What else are you gonna do then?"

"We're gonna watch... stuff. You know... just like what boys do." Jimin answered.

Taehyung then nodded 500 times,"Yes. YES. YES!!! We are gonna watch some stuff that boys watch without girls."

I was grossed out by their answer. _Too much information!!!!_ "Yuck. Okay, fine! I won't come then! You are so disgusting. Why --- You --- Jimin?! Seriously?! You're gonna -- Jungkook?! You're coming too?!"

Jungkook shrugged, "Hey, I'm a... I'm a guy too. This is how we learn... _things._ "

 _Again, too much information!!!_ "Please stop talking. I don't need to hear anything else about these... _things._ " I grunted and looked at my watch ---5:45pm. _I still got the time to spare before I meet up with Jennie._

I don't want to lie to them, but I guess it's better that they don't know that I'm meeting with Jennie. Knowing these boys, I'm pretty sure they'd insist on coming if I tell them.

 

_I want to fight this battle alone. I want to confront Jennie by myself_

 

So I told them, "I'm gonna drop by the library to return a book then I'll come home. Good night you guys. Uhm... enjoy I guess?" I flinched,  "Seriously, you are so gross." I waved them goodbye and hurriedly ran back to school.

 

I wasn't lying when I told the boys that I'm gonna run to the library to return a book. I still have about an hour before I go meet with Jennie and good thing our library's open until 6:30 (surprisingly, there were many students "studying" and "reading" when I came in.)

I returned a book that I borrowed for our Lit class and went to the Maths section to browse some reading materials. Mr. Lee will hand my make-up exam by next week, and I want to be ready for it.

When I got the books that I think I needed, I sat down at one of the tables near the entrance and pretended to read. My heart is going haywire again; I feel tensed but my mind is shockingly nonchalant at the thought of confronting Jennie.

I checked my watch again -- 6:25pm. The library will be closed soon so I gathered my belongings and left.

It's in our handbook that students are only allowed inside the school premises until 7:30pm, so I guess Jennie thinks that our talk would be short and simple. Our meeting place is a good 10-minute walk from the stock room. The sun is setting, so the sky is a mixture of orange, pink and lilac. I was so preoccupied by my school situation that I can't even watch sunsets anymore. I walked slowly, through the hundreds of trees surrounding the school grounds, feeling the cool air through my skin while I watched the horizon slowly change its color as the sun ends its shift for the day.

 

_I wish my school days are as calm and beautiful as this._

 

I eventually reached the gymnasium and walked slowly towards the stock room. I opened the door carefully. It was pitch black inside as the sun has set so I struggled a bit before I find the light switch. There were shelves upon shelves of old books on the corners and maybe a hundred armchairs that are in complete disarray placed in the middle of the room. 

The room has a gloomy vibe to it, to be honest. I can't really describe it but the smell is like a combination of dust, chalk and old wood. It was also humid inside as the windows are all closed and there are no fans nor AC that I can turn on to get some cool air circulating.

 _"Jennie_?" I tried calling for her, maybe she was just hiding in here somewhere.

 

Nobody answered. Maybe she's not here yet. I checked the time -- 6:42pm.

 

Then my phone rang. _It's Taehyung._ I picked it up, "Hello?"

/Nica, where are you?/ There's a tone of fear and worry on his voice.

I answered, slightly panicking, "Still at school. Why?"

/Are you alone? Why are you still there?! It's getting dark./

 I lied, "I'm on my way home as we speak."

/Good. Well, uhm... Do you remember that stalker that I was telling you guys about? The one who kept on following me every morning?/

I heard Jimin talking in the background, "Give me your phone, I'll explain it to her. We don't have time."

/Nica, Jennie is TaeTae's stalker./

Jimin's statement threw me for a loop, "What are you talking about?!" 

/It all started this morning. Tae was on his way to school with Minho and Seojun-hyung, you know them right? Seniors? Football varsity? Anyway, Minho-hyung noticed that someone's following them and Tae mentioned that he thinks someone's following him every morning. Now, Minho-hyung.../

Jungkook shouted, "Minho-hyung can be a spy!"

/Kookie, let me finish talking. Where was I? Yes, Minho-hyung. Tae said he tried to corner the stalker to know who she is but he only managed to grasp her arm before she ran away. He got a good look on her though, and he was sure that it was Jennie./

I tried to give Jennie the benefit of the doubt, "How sure was he? I mean, Minho-oppa had never seen Jennie right? Did Taehyungie showed him a picture of her?"

/That's what we thought, too. So we tried thinking of other evidence to prove that it was her. Then we got sidetracked./

Jungkook made a comment again, "The plot thickens."

/Jungkook, I swear. One more word and I'll smack you./

Jungkook wheezed, "If you can reach me."

/I'm not done growing. I'll reach your height and the moment I do, I will skin you --/

I heard screeching, and then Taehyung's voice. Apparently, he snatched the phone from Jimin. /Hello? Nica? I'll continue the story as we have no time and I might kill these two if this continues. Are you home yet?/

I lied, _again,_ "Almost. Hold up. I'm really confused. Why are you telling me all of this now? We were together for 9 hours."

/Do you remember the paper that was found under your desk? It was from another school right? Jungkook had this brilliant idea that maybe if we investigate who the real owner of that paper would lead us to this awful person who framed you for cheating. We did some research, _well, actually,_ we asked a bunch of people and as turns out, it was Jennie's old school. We went and visit that school after we had ice cream./

Then I heard Jungkook's voice. He has the phone now. /We didn't really watch R18 stuff Nica, I swear./

Taehyung said, "Give me that --"

More screeching, but Jungkook spoke again, 

/Ssshh, it's my time to explain! Anyway, we asked some students about her and luckily we came across some of her former classmates. One of them showed us Jennie's "secret" Facebook account... Jennie got it really bad for Taehyung. Her bedroom is full of his pictures and they said that she's been obsessed with Taehyung since middle school. She wanted everyone to call her "Mrs. V" 'cause that's Taehyung's nickname right?! There's even a rumor that she basically threatened her parents that she'll commit suicide if they don't let her transfer to our school./

 Jimin then reached for the phone and said, 

 

_/Nica, she's crazy./_

 

Before I can even react to Jimin's words, I felt a hard thing hit my head and everything went black.

 

* * *

 

When I regained consciousness, I found myself tied onto a chair in the middle of the stock room and all I can smell was gasoline. I can't move as my arms, waist, legs, and feet are bound.

 _Oh, God._ I yelled, with tears streaming down my eyes, "JENNIE!!!!"

She showed up in front of me, near the door, with a lighter on her hand, "Oh, you're awake."

She was smiling at me, the same bright smile that she had every day when we're together at school. She had dark circles in her eyes and her hair was unkempt.

I don't know if my last conversation with Chim, Tae, and Kook affected my perception, but she really does look like a PSYCHOPATH right now.

 

I started to feel scared for my life.

 _I am just 16._ I have so many things I want to do for myself. I want to finish school, help my parents, be successful, travel the world, fall in love, get married, and have kids.

 _Heck, I've never even had a boyfriend yet!_ I can't even confess to Jin-oppa that I have this huge crush on him for the longest time or even tell Jungkook that sometimes I feel like I'm,  _sort of kind of but I'm not sure yet 'cause, again, we are only 16 and I honestly don't know exactly what it is,_ falling for him and based on the state that I am in right now, I don't get to confess to either of them... ever.

"Why are you doing this? I thought we were friends. You were so nice to me." I said as I cry my eyes out.

 

I'm gonna die. I knew it. I'm gonna die tonight.

I didn't even have the chance to say goodbye to my parents and brothers.

God, if I had known that it'll be the last day of my life, I shouldn't have been so pissy this morning.

 

"I really didn't get why the girls in our class despise you at first. I genuinely pitied you 'cause you're this helpless girl, outcasted by her girl classmates. But then, eventually I figured out why they hated you so much. BECAUSE YOU... ARE A FREAKING SLUT." Jennie's stares pierced right through me, burning my flesh. She clutched the lighter that was in her hand, so tight that she started shaking.

"Do you know how much it physically hurt to be with you everyday?! You acting so cute and helpless in front of those boys and Taehyung. Taehyung..." Jennie let out a brief smile, then she returned to her psycho self again, "YOU GET TAEHYUNG'S ATTENTION WITHOUT EVEN TRYING! I watched him look at you every day and I want him to look at me like that but he can't even say one word to me BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS ON THE WAY, SEEKING FOR HIS ATTENTION!"

I made an attempt to defend myself, "Jennie, I don't --"

But she screamed, eyes wide with fury, "SHUT UP! If I hear one more word from you, I won't hesitate to smack your head again."

I didn't say a peep, but I let out a muffled sob.

She continued ranting, "I almost lost it when he lent you his uniform. YOU WORE HIS FUCKING UNIFORM TO CLASS!!! That was my mistake, if I had known that he would do this after I had told that stupid boy to throw chocolate milk on you I wouldn't have done it in the first place."

 

_So it was her too? Wow._

 

She walked towards me and I felt chills come down my spine. "Taehyung cares for you. I can see how his face lights up the moment you enter the room. He looks out for you, and I die everytime I have to fake a smile and act like it's okay to watch him go crazy over you. HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD IN SEDUCING HIM!!!"

She squatted in front of me to meet my eye level, "I tried so hard to mess you up. I drugged you at that party, and it kinda worked 'cause they were so angry at you the next day. I also plotted that whole cheating incident, 'cause it makes sense right? You were so hangover that you didn't have time to study so you cheated to pass the exam. I thought Taehyung would lose interest in you..."

She grabbed my throat and I cried even more, "WHAT IS IT WITH YOU?!!! YOU ARE NOT EVEN THAT PRETTY! God, you make me sick."

"Jennie, please. Let me go. I'm begging you, please." I was struggling to speak as she was choking me. 

"Why? So you would go tell Taehyung that you've been bullied again? So he could take care of you again?! NO." She lets go of me and I felt like gagging when my airway is finally free.

I begged for my life again, my voice all squeaky and desperate, "Jennie, please."

Jennie walked towards the door, "Since all my little games didn't work, sadly I would have to _completely_ get you out of the way."

She reached for a red gallon of gasoline lying by the entrance and spread it on the entire room, including _on_ me. 

"Don't do this please. Please." I said, tears pouring like waterfalls.

Jennie smiled and got something on her pocket -- a key. She acted surprised, "Oh, look what I've got here! It was really easy finding the key to that stupid door. I used my charm on one of the custodians to find it."

She flicked the lighter that was on her other hand and set the armchair by the entrance on fire, "I could've just set you on fire first, but I want you to enjoy a slow and torturous death. Goodbye, Nica."

I shrieked, "JENNIE!"

Jennie went out and closed the door shut. 

I screamed again, "HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE, SOMEBODY! HELP ME!" I kept on scrambling my words as I'm crying while trying to speak.

 

I made numerous attempts to free myself that my skin started to bleed from the friction. The armchairs are all made of wood, so fire spread quickly. I suddenly heard voices, _female voices,_ from the outside.

 _"Are you out of your mind?!!!!"_  I am not sure which voice it is.

 _"LET ME GO!"_ That's Jennie's.

"You are a psycho! Oh my God, where is Nica?! Did you seriously locked her up in there and set the room on fire?!" That voice is familiar.

"You hate her too, right?! Aren't you happy?! I got rid of her once and for all!" That's Jennie again.

"You crazy bitch, we were insecure and overly jealous of her getting the boys' attention but not to the point that we want to literally kill her! Oh my God! Wait, Seulgi! Call Jimin! Tell her we know where Nica is! Oh my God!!!" 

 

The girls...

The same girls who have been bullying me since Day 1...

They came? Of all people?

 

"HELP! I'M IN HERE!" My lungs are starting to get filled with smoke that it makes me hard to speak and even breathe.

 

I heard countless knocks on the door, "Nica! We'll get you out of there! I swear!" That voice is Irene's. I'm sure of it. She's kind of the leader, always telling the others what to do. "Yerim, find the keys! I'm sure this bitch has it hidden somewhere in her." Yerim's a part of their group, too, but she is passive in bullying me. Usually she just watches and laughs at the side.

"OUCH! DON'T PULL ON MY HAIR!" Jennie screamed.

"I SWEAR TO GOD IF NICA DIES BEFORE WE EVEN GET TO APOLOGIZE, I WILL SHAVE YOUR HEAD." That's Sooyoung's voice. The one who pushed me to the pool that one time.

 

"I forgive you! For everything." I yelled.

Another familiar voice, _Wendy's_ , replied, "Nica, don't forgive us yet. We haven't even rescued you!"

Fire has reached from where I am sitting. There are only 5 armchairs remaining around me before I'm toasted. I don't feel any fear nor panic anymore; I just feel lightheaded. I can feel the smoke slowly constricting my airway, and it gets harder and harder to breathe as seconds go by. What makes it worse is I can't even cover my nose and mouth as I am bounded. My eyes are starting to feel itchy and irritated as well that I started squinting just to see.

 

"NICA! NICA, I'M HERE! I GOT YOU!"

 

_Jungkook._

_That's Jungkook's voice._

 

"NICA, PLEASE STAY AWAKE. WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF THERE!"

 

_Jimin._

 

"NICA, I'M SORRY..."

 

_Taehyung._

_They're here._

 

 

I tried my hardest to keep my eyes open, but it's just too much.

This is too much.

Everything is too much.

Maybe I should just stop struggling, and rest.

 

Before everything went black again, I felt two sturdy arms lifting me up.

 

 

_"Nica, please. Wake up. Please. God, I didn't even get to say I love her. Nica, please. Breathe. For me."_

 

 

 

 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come shout at me on [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/_saranghaejjk) or [AFF](https://www.asianfanfics.com/profile/view/1587105) :]


	9. Aftermath

 

Everytime I open my eyes, I feel like I'm watching a movie trailer. I only see snippets of the events going on around me. _What is going on?_

 

_Am I still alive? Am I dreaming? Does your mind play imaginary scenes before you die?_

 

 

The first time I regained consciousness (I think? Again, I'm still not sure of what's real and what isn't.), I can hear Jennie yelling and bawling from a distance. I don't know where she was, heck I don't even know where _I_ was, but I'm sure that she's not that far. I can't understand what she was saying, something about Taehyung? I think I heard her say Taehyung's name.

 

_I don't know. I'm confused. Everything hurts._

 

I also hear muffled voices in the background, but they're all washed out by her loud voice. Her screams pierced through my ears, but that didn't stop me from falling asleep again.

 

 

_Sirens._

I hear sirens. 3 different kinds of sirens, if I'm not mistaken. 

_I tried to open my eyes again._

I see a police car, a firetruck and an ambulance, all parked in front of where I am. I supposed the firemen came first, as they are already busy putting out the fire on what must have been the stock room.The ambulance just pulled over and the paramedics are all rushing now to get a gurney. I supposed it's for me. 

_Okay. I'm struggling, but I'll try to stay awake this time._

Now I see a policeman holding, _no wait, more of restraining,_  Jennie and his partner is talking to the girls.

I can't help but smile as I watch my girl classmates, the ones who have been bullying me since I came in this school, give their statements to the police. I thought I was finally losing it when I heard them fighting with Jennie and actually rescuing me. After everything that had happened, I'd never thought that they'd save me -- I may have even assumed that they actually helped Jennie set up this whole thing, and surprisingly they did the opposite.

_Oh, boy._

Jennie managed to free herself from the policeman's grasp and she ran to Taehyung and hugged him real tight. I can't hear her clearly but she was crying and telling him something. Taehyung can't even look at her; he kept on taking her arms off of his waist but Jennie won't cut him loose. He's telling her something, but I can't read his lips -- _Sorry?_ I think he's saying sorry to her.

Finally, 2 other policemen who were in the car grabbed Jennie away from him. Taehyung said something again to her, it was like 5 words and Jennie threw a fit again.

Honestly, seeing Jennie like this made me feel sorry for her. I can see how badly (and miserably) she likes Taehyung that she even did everything _, everything_ in her power to get him, yet she still failed. I couldn't relate to her 'cause I've never really liked someone that much -- to the point of stalking him and even hurting others just to get him ( _Goodness, I couldn't even tell Jin-oppa that I've been crushing on him since God invented time_ ).

What's worse is, I didn't even notice that she likes Taehyung.  _I'm that naive._

 

My attention shifted when Jimin ran towards the paramedic team, he looked disoriented and apprehensive. His eyes were puffy and he kept on sniffing. Was he crying? Oh no.  _I am so sorry for making you worry again, Chim._

They're coming closer, so I can actually hear them talking. Jimin wiped his tears and spoke to one of them, "She's still unconscious. We think it's because she inhaled too much smoke. Do you have an oxygen tank in there? She needs help with breathing. She's barely breathing. She... I checked her pulse and thank God she still has pulse, but... She's not waking up." _Chim, I'm awake. I can hear you. I just can't speak nor move._

Taehyung ran to catch up to them and added, "She has burns too, we washed them with water but some of them turned into blisters. She's... She's gonna be fine right? They are just minor burns. We all checked. She's gonna be fine. Right, Sir? Please tend to her burns too. She's barely breathing and she has all of these burns... She --" Tears went streaming down his eyes as he struggled to speak again, "Please do your best to save her. Please."

The paramedic guy just nodded and walked even faster as he and his team shuffled and wheeled the gurney towards me.

 

_Hold on, where am I?_

_God,_ I've been subsequently sleeping and waking up that I didn't even bother to check where I am. I can't even move my head that much 'cause it hurts like hell.

_Okay, Nica. Focus. Don't sleep. Don't fall asleep._

I slowly tilted my head. I am lying on a bench by the big Oak tree near the school gate. My head is on someone's lap.

I looked down and see an arm around my tummy -- _it's gotta be Jungkook's arm._ I'm sure of it 'cause I see this arm every day.

He has his arm around my tummy, and his hand is holding mine. I swallowed and the pain's even more excruciating. I looked up to see his face, "Jungkook?" 

Jungkook's grip on me got tighter, like he doesn't want to let me go, "Oh my God, you're awake. You're awake." He smiled at me while tears run down his eyes. My forehead and cheek caught some of it.

"Hi." I said, softly. I'm in a lot of pain, but I still managed to return his smile.

 

Then I feel lightheaded. My eyes started feeling heavy as I gasp for breath.  _Okay, I guess time's up. Time to sleep again._

Will I get to open my eyes again? I'm really, like literally, breathless right now so there may be a slim chance that I won't ever wake up. It's kinda funny 'cause I'm not even scared about this idea. I was freaking out about dying when I was in there, slowly burning and suffocating, but now I guess I've accepted my fate? 

 

_I still don't know. I'm still confused. Everything still hurts._

 

Maybe that's why I'm not panicking. No, not anymore. 'Cause I'm tired. I'm tired of everything hurting and confusing me. Maybe this pain and confusion will stop once I stop waking up. Once I stop trying, yet failing, to breathe.

 

 

As I close my eyes, I felt Jungkook's lips brushed gently against my head. 

He whispered, in between sobs, "Nica, please wake up. Stay strong for me. Please."

 

 

_If I'm really dying, atleast the last person I get to see is Jungkook._

 

* * *

 

"Hyung, I think we got the hospital bill covered."

"Did you go to the cashier? How much is it?"

"If you're short, I can lend you some money."

"Thank you, Jin-hyung."

 

_Is this heaven? No, it can't be. I hear my boys' voices._

Not that they won't go to heaven. I'm sure they will, but something's still not right here.

 

 

"I think we can manage. For now. The prize from the last battle covered most of it."

"Everytime you say battle, Hyung, I imagine you wearing an armor and slaying someone."

"Too bad we didn't get to watch you, RAP MONSTER!"

"You should've come, Taehyung-ah. He kicked ass that night."

"He always kicked ass."

"We're still minors, Hobi-hyung. We can't go to underground rap battles. The security's tight in there, which is kind of ironic 'cause these battles are illegal to begin with."

 

 

I knew it. Namjoon-oppa is a badass underground rapper! That's where he gets the money he gives to our mom!

 

_Wait, I can't open my eyes. I think my brain's still re-learning how to. Ugh, come on. Figure it out._

 

 

"RAP MONSTER? Namjoon-oppa is a... rapper?"

"I thought it's Suga-oppa!"

"Yoongi-hyung got me into it. We both got hooked into rap battles to help with the family expenses."

"That's kinda cool."

 

That's Yerim and Sooyoung. They're here too. I want to see their faces!  _C'mon, Nica. Wake up._

 

"Does Nica know about your secret identities?"

"Haha! It sounded like they're members of the Avengers or something."

"No. We've been planning to tell her but she has gone through so much ever since she started high school that we never had a chance to sit down and catch up, you know?"

"Honestly, I miss wrestling her until she wakes up. Joon-ah, we used to do that right?"

"God, this is my fault. I promised Mom and Dad that I'd protect her at all times and look what happened --"

"OMG! Nica's awake!"

 

FINALLY, my eyelids learned how to unfold themselves.

It looks like I'm in a private hospital room; I have a dextrose attached to my left hand and an oxygen mask to help me breathe. My chest still hurts, but not as much as before.

My boys and bullies-turned-saviors are all gathered around my bed, looking at me with wide eyes.

 

"How are you?" Taehyung asked.

Jimin smacked him in the head, "She has that oxygen thingy, she can't speak!"

"I can see that!" Taehyung replied.

 

I laughed, rather weakly as it feels like someone's stabbing me on the chest.

 

Irene then said to me, crying, "Nica, I am so sorry for being terrible to you. It was so immature and pathetic."

Seulgi added, "You have every right to hate us."

Sooyoung nodded and said, "I'm really sorry for pushing you to the pool and for everything."

Yerim wiped her tears, "We regret everything."

Wendy held my hand, "We are truly, deeply sorry, Nica for giving you such a hard time."

 

I removed my mask, let out a couple heavy breaths and said, "Thank you for saving me. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't be here right now so thank you." I turned my head to Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook who were coincidentally standing next to each other, "I heard your voices right before I passed out. You were also there right? How did you manage to break in? Jennie locked the door."

Jimin shook his head, "Not just locked, she had it CHAINED, Nica! We were all panicking and crying and basically losing our minds 'cause we can't find the key and the fire's spreading really fast and so I called 119 and --"

Taehyung interrupted him and continued the narration, _with matching reenactments_ , "Then Sooyoung and Seulgi held Jennie on each arm and Irene searched through her pockets and so she found the key and handed it to me and when I was about to like, run towards the door..." he really ran towards the door to _this_ room, showing me how he looked like, "...SuperKookie here smashed the door with an axe that he found --" Taehyung pointed at Jungkook then pretended to hold an axe and dramatically smashed the doorknob with his imaginary axe, "honestly, why would they leave an axe there? Anyway, I am so thankful for their negligence. That axe is a lifesaver."

Jimin cut him off and carried on the story,  "...and so SuperKookie and WonderJimin, _yes I helped wrecked the door with my muscles_..." he flexed, I shook my head and smiled. Taehyung then yelled, "Hey, I helped too!" Jimin shoved him, "Okay fine. SuperKookie, WonderJimin and IncredibleTae all took turns in smashing the hell out of those chains and then it finally broke off. I thought the hard part is over, but when we get to see the inside of the room, it was already covered in flames. I've never felt that scared in all my life, Nica. I thought we were gonna lose you. But then..." Jimin tapped Jungkook's shoulder, with a huge grin on his face, like he was a proud father boasting about his son,"...SuperKookie here, without hesitation, ran through the fire to get you. You should be a fireman, Jungkookie."

I then noticed that Jungkook has a cast on his arm. He went inside a burning room to come and get me. I assumed he even got burned because of it.

"Thank you, Kookie. I'm sorry, you got hurt because of me." I said.

He smiled shyly, looking down again, "It's nothing. Really."

Yoongi and Namjoon-oppa gave him bear hugs. Yoongi-oppa said, "We owe you bigtime, Kookie."

Jimin then yelled, "Hey! I helped with opening the door! I also called 119! Why aren't you thanking me?"

Namjoon-oppa then said, "Jimin and Taehyung, thank you for saving our baby sister's life. Sooyoung, Wendy, Irene, Seulgi, Yerim, thank you."

Jin-oppa then walked towards me and gently pinched my cheek, "How are you feeling? I suppose you need painkillers for your burns. I'm sorry Oppa wasn't there to protect you, Nica."

 

_God, I feel like my heart is gonna combust._

 

Hoseok-oppa, who was by my foot, tickled my toes, "Are you feeling better? Do you want us to get you anything?"

I shook my head. I then said, "How's Jennie?"

There was silence, but Irene eventually replied, "She's a minor so social services took her away. From the looks of it they had her assessed by a psychiatrist and they'll go from there."

Jin-oppa then commented, "She really had it bad for Taehyung, huh?"

Taehyung's lips suddenly turned into a straight line, "I'm not really sure if I should be mad at her for hurting Nica or feel sorry for her. I just feel bad, in general."

 

It was silent again for a moment. All of us thought about Jenny and I guess we all have the same sentiments as Taehyung's. Then, Yoongi-oppa started to panic while looking at his phone.

"Hyung, what is it?" Hobi-oppa asked.

Yoongi-oppa replied, "It's our dad. I didn't have the guts to call him earlier and so I texted him to come meet us here and he said he's on his way. He's with mom." My brothers looked at me at the same time.

 

 

My chest felt heavy again. I put on my oxygen mask.

_How am I gonna explain everything to my mom and dad?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love reading comments. They're like vitamins. Please leave some more. ;)


	10. Family Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... I had writer's block again (BOOOOO) and so I'm sorry if it took a while. Also, I've been editing the past chapters and even added some scenes.
> 
> AGAIN, thank you for reading and leaving comments. They keep me going. ♥

 

_Tick... Tock... Tick... Tock..._

Has the wall clock been this loud or it's just too quiet in here that I can hear it?

 

Our mom's staring at me. _Like, literally staring at me._ She's sitting on a stool just beside my head, shifting her hands between caressing my face and touching my arm carefully (the arm connected to the dextrose). She's crying, but quietly. She has not uttered even a single word since she and Dad came (all our friends had left instantly when they arrived, by the way. Obviously they wouldn't wanna be here while we were being scolded).

 

She's just crying and touching me and her actions just gets creepier and creepier as time passes. 

 

Eomma is absolutely _not_ the silent type. She nags us every time we, or my brothers atleast, get into trouble. She nags and nags until we get her point and apologize and swear to never do it again. Each morning before going to school, she has this habit of telling us to finish our food, do our assignments before going to bed, stay out of trouble, clean our rooms _("Namjoon, you can't call this a room! This is a jungle! You have a laundry basket for a reason. Why are your clothes on the floor?!")_ , and that no matter what happens, she will always love us.

She never wastes a minute to badger Joonie and Yoongi-oppa whenever they mess up, so her silence is truly scaring the heck out of me. I guess I messed up big time that she doesn't have any will left in her to lecture me.

 

Our dad, on the other hand, has been pacing back and forth for 30 minutes now. He hasn't said one word either; he would look at me and attempt to say something and just end up shaking his head and continues on shuffling. Following him with my eyes makes me nauseous.

 

 _Appa_ , in contrast, is the quiet one. Yoongi-oppa takes after him, I guess. They don't say nor show much, so when they do express their affection anyone would attest to their sincerity. He's been strict with us since we were kids (more than our mom, believe it or not), but I think dads are supposed to be like that. He'd always let our mom do the nagging first and if things got worse or she can't handle it anymore (I remember that one time when my brothers fought over a gameboy, so bad that they ended up punching each other, our dad picked them up on each arm, smacked them on their butts and locked them in our parents' room until they make up. The next day he bought another gameboy so they wouldn't have to fight again), Appa takes care of it. He handles the bigger problems, _so he'll handle this for sure._

He's always working, sometimes even on weekends to make ends meet, but he never fails to text me everyday (he doesn't say much though; he just tells me to take care and go home early) and he would always, _always_ bring me something when he gets home.

 

He's never good with words like our mom so I'm not surprised that he's struggling right now.

I wish he could say something though. Both of them.  _Anything._

 

I looked at my brothers who were sitting at the couch just below where the noisy wall clock is installed. Both of them are showing clear signs of internal panic --- Namjoon-oppa is twiddling his thumbs while Yoongi-oppa is biting his nails (Goodness, the last time I saw them looking like this was 2 years ago, when Yoongi-oppa drove our car without Dad's permission and he rear-ended our neighbor's motorcycle. Namjoon-oppa was riding shotgun so he got into trouble too).

 

 

_Tick... Tock... Tick... Tock..._

That wall clock is driving me nuts. I swear if I could just leave this bed, I would destroy it.

 

 

Our dad, _finally,_ stopped walking, and spoke. My brothers were both stunned upon hearing his voice.  _They're scared of him. I am, too._  "Yoongi, correct me if I'm wrong, and I do hope I am wrong because what you had told me over the phone didn't make sense at all. Not one bit..." He held onto the footboard of my bed and sighed heavily, "So... Nica has been bullied by her classmates since she started going to your school to the point that one of them locked her in a room full of wooden armchairs and set it on fire? And it's all because she's been hanging out with your group?!"

Yoongi-oppa swallowed a lump in his throat. I swear his milky white face just got whiter, "Yes."

 

Our mom whimpered. That's a progress, I guess? Atleast she's making sounds now.

 

Our dad shut his eyes closed and let out another heavy sigh, "Namjoon-ah... you said that you two will handle the hospital bills because you have won a rap battle. _Rap battle._ What the heck is that?!"

My brothers looked at each other. Namjoon-oppa replied, his voice a little squeaky, "We... We've been... We've been joining underground rap battles since last year. Don't worry, they're safe. We earn money 'cause we always win."

Our dad raised his voice, but he sounded full of worry and shock, "So you're telling me that all this time, my youngest and only daughter has been mistreated and almost, ALMOST, died and your school is not aware nor even doing anything about it and my sons are underground... rappers? Rappers that join these hidden, not to mention also illegal, battles to earn money so you could help us with our family's expenses?! And all this time we are not aware of this?!!"

"This is my fault." Our mom said. I felt slightly relieved to hear her voice again, "I have been so busy with work that I didn't even have enough time to monitor you. My princess was having such a hard time at school and it was too late before I found out about it." She sobbed even more and I can't help but cry too. It pains my heart to see her break down because of me.

"I'm sorry for making you both worry." I said. I tried reaching for my mom but I can't.

Our dad then yelled, I guess he's just too frustrated and worried and enraged by every bit of information that was laid on him today that he just needs something or someone to take responsibility, to blame. _And of course it had to be my brothers_ , "You promised to protect your sister at all times! What ---"

I stopped him instantly for saying anything further that would blow this out of proportion, if that's even possible 'cause I'm sure this is it. We, _I_ , have hit rock bottom, "Please don't blame them, Appa. They did everything in their power to protect me. I am not a toddler anymore. You can't expect them to watch over me all the time; there are battles that I need to face alone. This, this situation, this is all on me. It's not Yoongi-oppa nor Namjoon-oppa's fault that I nearly died. Don't ever take this out on them. This happened to me not because they were irresponsible. This happened because _I_ was."

 

And then that's it. One second our dad was this high, indestructible tower that we are all terrified of -- tall and sturdy and brave and now he crumbles into a sobbing mess like our mom.

 

Which made me cry even more, of course.

 

He kneels on my side, in front of Mom and holds my hand, still sobbing as he said, "When your Yoongi-oppa told me that they're in the hospital because something happened to you, I was so scared that I can't even think straight. You are so precious to me, to us, Nica. I don't know what could have happened if we lost you..." he then turned around to face my brothers, who were both crying silently, "I'm sorry if I took the blame on you for what happened."

Namjoon-oppa stood up, placed his long arms around our dad and gave him the biggest and warmest back hug, "It's okay, Appa. You were right, we failed in taking care of Nica. I'm sorry."

Yoongi-oppa also stood up and ran to our mom, knelt in front of her and hugged her by the waist, "Mom, I'm sorry. I am the eldest. I should take all the responsibility."

Mom hugged him back and gently patted him in the head, "Yoongi, I don't blame you and Namjoon. I'm just glad that you are all okay. That's the only thing that matters to me."

Yoongi-oppa buried his face on Mom's chest and cried, "I'm so sorry for being a pain in the butt. I always make you worry. I'm sorry." He then turned his back and grabbed Dad into a quick hug, "Appa, I'm sorry."

Dad smiled and rustled his hair, "Aigoo, my eldest..." He embraced Yoongi-oppa in return and said, all teary-eyed, "I'm sorry, too. Thank you for being the temporary me whenever I'm not at home and for helping our family in the best way you can -- it must be hard to be a working student."

Namjoon-oppa fell to his knees and hugged Mom as well. Tears fell from Mom's eyes again, "My baby Joonie... When did you get to be so big?"

Namjoon-oppa chuckled, "Puberty."

I then pouted and said, to light the vibe up, "What about me? I should get a hug too right?"

It was effective as all 4 of them chuckled and looked at me, and for a moment I was slightly thankful that Jennie almost killed me because if it hadn't been for her, we wouldn't all be here in the same room, talking about our feelings, making amends, laughing and hugging each other. We wouldn't be like a family again. 

 

"Nica, are you sure you're okay? Do you need anything?" Yoongi-oppa asked.

I nodded and smiled, this time definitely not faking it, "Yes, I am okay. Actually, I'm more than okay."

 

The guys all stood up and sat on the couch, looking more relaxed and at ease.

I figured that it's the perfect timing to joke about my brothers' alter egos, "Although... Suga-oppa, do you mind getting me some water? Or Rap Monster-oppa could get it 'cause he's closer to the water dispenser."

The look on my parents' and brothers' faces were priceless. My parents looked puzzled, staring at me and obviously waiting for an explanation; Namjoon-oppa covered his face with his hands in embarrassment and Yoongi-oppa's usually small eyes doubled in surprise.

Namjoon-oppa tried to utter words at me, "How did you--"

"People always call you by these names and I never figured out why, it's nice to finally know where they came from." I replied, with a smug look on my face, "I can't believe my brothers are badass rappers. You could totally beat Jay-Z in a rap battle."

Both of them gave me an evil look.  _Teasing them is so satisfying!_

Dad cleared his throat, rubbed his chin and asked, "Hmmm... so rapping huh? Do you wear gold chains and have...like these crazy, weird hairstyles? Do you take drugs too?! I swear to God --"

Namjoon-oppa scratched his head and rolled his eyes, "DAD! God no! We are NOT one of those. We dress... I don't know. When I go to battles I usually dress casually.. Hyung always wear a jersey for some reason."

Dad then asked, eyes wide with curiosity, "Jersey? Do you like... play basketball while rapping?! Hang on, aren't you too young to join these rap war... battle... fight... I don't know..."

It's Yoongi-oppa's turn to enlighten our male parent, "Well, I'm 19. Joonie here just turned 18 remember? So we're not minors. Besides, we don't hang out after the battles. We go home right after they give us the payment. We have been doing this for a year now, so they know us. It's okay, Dad."

Mom and I glanced at each other, smiling. Listening to our boys' conversation is really amusing as it happens once in a blue moon.

Dad stared at the ceiling, hands on his temples, processing the information that was just given to him. He sit up straight and shoots another query, "Okay... codenames! I assume Nica just called you by your codename?"

"Stage name, Appa. They need stage names to look cooler." I said, giggling.

Namjoon-oppa glares at me, then smiled shyly at Dad, "Rap Monster is my stage name."

Dad covered his mouth, and let out the widest grin that he's ever had, "RAP MONSTER. Wow, that's... wow. You live up to your name I suppose."

Namjoon-oppa smiled again, this time his cute dimples have decided to make an appearance, "I have a lot to improve."

Dad gives him a side hug, "Well... if this makes you happy. Then who am I to stop you right? It amazes me how you can maintain being on top of your class even when you join these battles on a regular basis. You make me proud, Joonie." He then turned to Yoongi-oppa, "How about you? Nica said something a while ago but I forgot what it was. Wait, I'll just guess... Rap Machine? Rap God? The Amazing Yoongi?"

Yoongi-oppa shakes his head in embarrassment, "I'm still undecided with my stage name as I don't really do battles as frequent as Joon-ah 'cause I have a part-time job, right? They call me Suga because I'm a shooting guard when I play basketball in school and I've used that name a couple of times, but for intense battles, I go by Agust D."

Dad blinked. I think he's still guessing where Agust D came from, "Agust D. It's a scary name. It's... badass."

Namjoon-oppa then compliments our older brother, "Hyung is the fastest among the rappers here in our area, including me. He spits fire onstage."

"Well, I'm not surprised as your Hyung loves reading nursery rhymes when he was younger. Is that how you realize you wanted to rap?! You were inspired by Humpty Dumpty?!" Dad covered his mouth with his hands, pretending to be shocked. We all laughed so hard.

 

 _I missed him._ He's so funny when he's in the mood. He could be the life of the party when he wants to. Again, another trait that Yoongi-oppa got from him.

 

When the laughter died down, our dad stood up, and came to me, "I guess I should go talk to your doctor about your condition, so we know how long you need to stay here." He reached for me and kissed my forehead. He then whispered, "I love you. You know that right?"

"You don't say it often, but I do. I love you too, Appa."  I replied, tears starting to form at the corner of my eyes again.

He smiled at me, turned around and asked Yoongi-oppa, "Could you come with me to the doctor? I might not understand him. It's better if you're there too."

Yoongi-oppa nodded and followed him, and as they were heading out the door, Dad placed an arm over his shoulder and said, "Thank you again for acting as the Dad whenever I'm away. You're still young and yet so responsible. You never ask for allowance and you always give your mom money to help with the expenses. You really take after me, don't you?"

Yoongi-oppa replied before closing the door behind him, "I think I do." I might not have seen his face, but I know that he has the biggest, widest smile on his face upon hearing that. He and Dad, having the same personality, rarely show affection towards each other and so it warms my heart to see them interact like this.

 

Mom then reached for her purse, "I'm gonna make some calls."

"It's late, Eomma. Who are you calling?" Namjoon-oppa asked.

She replied to him with another question, "Has the police been here? They are involved, I suppose, as your sister nearly died."

Namjoon-oppa answered, "She was still unconscious when they came. They said they'll come back tomorrow to get her statement."

Mom found her phone at last, after having to dig through her purse. She started dialing, "I'm calling your Uncle Siwon."

Namjoon-oppa and I looked at each other, both puzzled.

"Uncle Siwon? Why?" I asked. He's mom's cousin. We don't really see him that often, except for our family reunions every 2 years.

"Well, he's a lawyer. A good lawyer. We need him for this." she responded as she waits for someone to pick up the phone.

 

_What?!_

 

Before I even ask her again, she said, "I'm suing your school. I'm suing your bullies' parents. I'm suing everyone who's responsible for this."

"Mom --" I promptly said, and she cuts me off with, "You were bullied for months _at school_ and one of them even tried to burn you alive _inside the school premises_ , Nica. You can't expect me to just sit here and do nothing."

 

I fell silent.

Namjoon-oppa fell silent.

 

And there it was again, the sound of that goddamn wall clock.

_Tick... Tock... Tick... Tock._


	11. Make it Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of a text AU in here ;)  
> please let me know if you can't see the pictures! Love you all with all my heart.

"Do you want toast, Nica?" Dad asked me, lifting the bread that he's holding in his right hand that he's busily spreading with peanut butter.

I pouted, "I can't eat just yet, can I?"

He grimaced, suddenly remembering that I'm still on a strict IV fluid diet, "Oops. Sorry, baby. Wish I could share this peanut butter and jelly sandwich that I'm making right now."

I pout even more, _he is not helping_ , "I still don't know why I can't eat anything. I'm never hungry, sure, but I miss eating!"

Dad scratched his head and turned his back on me so I couldn't see him eating, "We'll ask your doctor when he comes, don't worry."

 

I'm still at the hospital apparently; Dad is busy eating breakfast (and NOT sharing it with me) while watching the morning news and Mom can't take the day off today so obviously she had to work. My brothers are in school so I have nobody to pester (they've been really patient with me, especially Yoongi-oppa, and I've been abusing my perks as a hospital patient by constantly bugging them. _It's payback time._ )

The fire happened a week and a half ago, and I'm feeling way, _way_ better so hopefully I can be discharged sooner than later. I had a couple of visitors over (even Sehun and his 2 other friends that we met at the diner, who, by the way, are actually named Baekhyun and Chanyeol, dropped by and brought some flowers. _Yoongi-oppa had his arms crossed the whole time they were here, trying so hard not to say anything_ ) which I think helped a lot with my recovery.

Speaking of recovery, I think my organs had figured out their functions again. My head doesn't hurt that much anymore, I don't have to squint my eyes to see, and most importantly, I can breathe now without any help from an oxygen tank.It seemed that my lungs have cleared up from the smoke that I had inhaled and have figured out how work on their own.

I also gained 2nd degree burns on my legs and arms. Most of them developed blisters, and my brothers have been taking turns in debriding and putting topical cream on them every day to make sure they heal properly and completely. ( _Again, perks. They've never been this caring towards me. Wow._ ) The doctor said that if Jungkook hadn't come and rescued me, even a minute later, I may have lost a limb. 

 

_He came just in time._

 

> _"Nica, please. Wake up. Please. God, I didn't even get to say I love her. Nica, please. Breathe. For me."_

 

> _"...God, I didn't even get to say I love her."_

 

> **_"...I love her."_ **

 

These were the last words I heard before I completely lost my consciousness. I wasn't sure that time whose voice was it, but it had to be Jungkook 'cause he was the one who rushed through the burning room to come save me right? 

 

UGH, WHATEVER.

I may have been hallucinating. I have inhaled tons of smoke that time. I may have been delusional. It's because of that freaking smoke.

  _Yes, that was just the smoke and the emotional trauma taking over me._

 

Anyway, a few  (actually, a lot) people came to check up on me as well --- some of my teachers, my old classmates, a social worker, a psychiatrist, the police, & Mr. Do, our school principal.

I'm not really close to any of my teachers and I think they just visited me as a common courtesy because in some way, they all feel guilty about what had happened to me. Mr. Lee, to my utmost surprise, also came with a paper bag full of scented candles (he said they might help me breathe properly). He was not in his usual grumpy state and he even told me before he left not to rush with the special exam and extra schoolwork that he had given me last week. _WOW._

Even my old classmates paid a visit. I've missed them all so much, and seeing them reminded me how my life was before this whole mess happened and made me wish that I could turn back time and be with them again. My childhood best friend, Chaeyoung, cried the whole time and asked me to transfer to her high school. OF COURSE I would love to, but her school's tuition fee is _outrageous_. My parents would honestly have to work 6 jobs 8 days a week to pay for it. Plus, I would have to move to a different city and live in a dorm or apartment (of which my Dad EXTREMELY disagrees, so this idea was instantly thrown out the window).

2 police investigators and a social worker came together and asked me a bunch of questions, mainly about the fire. I'm pretty sure the social worker was there to guide the 2 officers and make sure that they were asking me the right questions and not pressure me to provide further details about the incident if I'm not comfortable enough to discuss about it. They were all nice to me, but the whole interrogation process drained the life out of me. I gave my statement anyway, providing as much details as I can. _That's the least that I can do right?_ I didn't even notice that I was crying when I had to tell them about the turn of events leading to the fire. The social worker eventually decided to stop the officers in asking further questions. They all left shortly after that.

An hour later, the psychiatrist came, Ms. Bae. She asked me a couple of questions too, but I wasn't as terrified in answering them as I was when the police was here. She was warm and bubbly and was smiling most of time, even told me jokes and random stories. Talking to her felt like talking to a friend about a really terrible experience. It also helped lessen the emotional burden that I've been bottling up inside me. I was able to express myself freely, if not transparently, to her.

I remembered her asking if I keep getting repetitive flashbacks (I heard her mention that she was assessing me for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) and I can't find myself confessing to her that _HAHAHA yes I do have flashbacks but no they are not from the fire Ms. Bae and no, I do not scream nor cry HAHAHA I just keep on thinking that one of my seatmates aka one of my heroes aka one of my best guy friends might actually confessed to me while trying to save me from a burning room HAHAHA  and i don't know how to feel about this HAHAHA maybe because he's been really distant to me for months but not really because I know that he's always watching over me and whenever I'm in trouble he's there to help me? HAHAHAHA or maybe I'm just confused because all this time my eyes are set on Jin-oppa but then he came into the picture and messed it all up HAHAHAHA help me Ms. Bae HAHAHAHA I don't know what to do HAHAHAHA_

 

Of course, I wouldn't say that because 1.) my mom AND dad were watching me; 2.) She's a pyschiatrist, not a teenage relationship expert; 3.) I'm not even sure if I heard it right!

 

Again, what if I was just being delusional that time? My brain may have played tricks on me that I ended up hearing things.

 

Moving along, I also mentioned to Ms. Bae that I'm now scared of closed spaces and being left alone. This is quite hard to deal with, especially when I have to go to the bathroom (One night, I had to leave the bathroom door open when I was in there and I only had Namjoon-oppa with me and so I made him sing the whole time to assure me that he's physically there 'cause he had to hide behind a wall to give me privacy. _So he was singing while I was in the bathroom. It was quite funny._ ). Having the door closed doesn't bother me as long as someone is in the room with me.

Ms. Bae told me that it's totally normal to feel however I'm feeling, given what I've been through. She didn't make me feel like something's wrong me, and I guess that's the nature of her job -- helping people without making them feel like they actually need help. She also said that I need to come meet her for a few sessions after I'm discharged from the hospital so she could see how I'm doing, and maybe she could help me be okay again. Feel okay again. Think okay thoughts again. Be okay with closed spaces and being alone again.

 

Our principal came by yesterday with flowers and a basket full of fruits. He wasn't alone though; he came with a man in a suit and tie, which eventually I figured is the school lawyer. Mr. Do asked me how I was, with the sweetest smile on his face, and told me to get well real soon. He apologized to me over and over until I had to stop him because I'm so close to crying, and I feel like I'm not entitled to cry anymore because that's all I've been doing for months now.

I don't give him credit for whatever happened to me. Yes, I know he's the Principal so he gets the blame when all goes downhill, but it doesn't mean that he should be responsible for Jennie's doing. The grownups might say that he's at fault in some way, but I beg to disagree. This is why I _blatantly_ told my mom NOT to continue with the lawsuit. It's not gonna help anyone -- not the school and certainly not me.

After our conversation, Uncle Siwon arrived, also wearing a suit and tie (Do lawyers have to wear suit and tie at all times? Can't they wear jeans and a T-shirt for once?). He handed me a box of my favorite manju, asked how I am doing, kissed me on the forehead, and told the other adults to _"settle this once and for all"_. This, I assume, is my school situation.

They were gone for a few hours, until finally Mr. Do cheerfully came to my room to say goodbye to me before he went home. He didn't say anything to me about what he had discussed with my parents; he just made a joke about getting well soon or else _"my lawyer boyfriend might miss me"_ and then he took off. This had me relieved, as I took it as a sign that my parents have decided not to file a lawsuit against the school. After that, Uncle Siwon talked to my parents for another hour until he had to leave as well.

As soon as he was gone, Mom and Dad sat down and talked to me. In my 16 years of living in this planet, that was the first time that they had to sit down and talked to me seriously. _Usually, Yoongi-oppa gets this kind of treatment._

"We've decided NOT to file the lawsuit." Mom said.

My face lit up, "Thank you, Mom! Oh my Goodness --"

I was so ready to stand up and dance even if I'm practically tied up to my bed, but Dad had to cut short my celebration, "Wait, hear us out first. We will not sue your school for negligence, but you would need to transfer to another school next term. We are still not sure if you'd still continue going to school until this term ends; I guess depending on your recovery. Mr. Do said that your teachers will work some things to make sure that you would still finish all your requirements and not end up repeating your level next year. The school will also cover your medical expenses, including your therapy if you need it."

"Transfer? Appa, we barely make ends meet with our tuition fees and other expenses. Our school has the cheapest tuition fee in this place, where would you transfer me?!" I asked. _This is insanity._

Mom cleared her throat, "Well, I was supposed to tell you guys about this, but it slipped my mind since we got all distracted about your school situation..."

Whatever she's about to say, whatever it is, it's not good news. _I can feel it. "..._ I got promoted at work. They are sending me to London, and you're coming with me."

 

 

Not to be an ungrateful child or anything, but I wasn't really happy with Mom's news.

Not one bit.

Not at all.

 

* * *

 

"Nica, I need to go to the bathroom. Are you gonna be okay?" Appa asked.

I got nervous, but I nodded and told him, "You're gonna be quick right?"

"Yes, baby. I'm right here. Shout at me if you need anything." he replied as he quickly went to the washroom.

Just then my phone beeped. _This is good, something to distract me from the fact that I am, technically, all by myself._

 

 

 

 

I still have an IV on, so it was really a struggle to type with only one hand. I keep on making typos. _UGH._

 

 

 

I can totally imagine Jungkook saying that.

 _I miss them._ Especially now that I might not get the chance to be with them ever again.

 

 

 

 

 

Jimin's asking me to be THEIR date to the Spring Dance.  _God._ I'm not even sure if I can go to school by next week.

 

 

 

I can't help but laugh. What a cheeky boy.

 _Ugh, I feel guilty._ He is so excited about this dance. How am I gonna tell him? How am I gonna tell all of them?

 

 

 

 

 

 

They are making plans _for me._  I'm flattered, but my heart aches at the same time.

I need to tell them sooner than later. It's just gonna get worse if I keep on delaying this.

I let out a heavy sigh and started typing painfully slow. Jimin has 2 working hands so he kept on sending messages while I can't even barely type one word without making a mistake.

 

 

 

 

_Wrong timing._

 

 

I have to admit, I'm kinda relieved that I didn't have the chance to tell them about my parents' decision. _I am not ready._ Besides, I'm still hopeful that I can make Mom and Dad change their minds.

 

_You're gonna be fine, Nica. Everything will work out._

 

 

Half an hour passed, and a nurse entered and took out my IV catheter. _At last, I can use 2 hands now! AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, I can eat real food again!_

She said that the doctor will come and discuss my condition around noon. He'll also do a general check-up on me and decide if could be discharged or not.

 

 

 

 

 

I thought Yoongi-oppa was on _my_ side. This is so frustrating.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHAT THE HECK IS H--

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don't know how to respond. He is right, and I hate it when he's right.

Also, this is the first time that my eldest brother, my cold-hearted and lifeless as a rock eldest brother ( _no, not really_ ), told me that he loves me.

_I might have to thank Jennie for this._

 

 

 

 

 

I was about to reply to Yoongi-oppa when my phone beeped again.

 

 

 

OH MY GOODNESS, JIN-OPPA ACTUALLY TEXTED ME.

_How do I respond to this?!_

 

Suddenly, I heard my Dad's voice. I didn't even notice him leave the room, "Hey, how's your arm? Why are you smiling from ear to ear?!"

I turned my head up and looked at him, closing my lips to hide my wide smile, "No, nothing. Yoongi-oppa's just texting me."

"Hmmm." Dad stared at me, unbelievingly, "Your smile's too sweet and too wide. Are you sure it's your brother?"

I gave him _the_ look, "Dad..."

He turned his hands up in surrender, "Fine. I won't snoop then. I think you can eat now since they'd removed your IV."

I looked at my phone again, read Jin-oppa's message for the 20th time, and faced my Dad, "Appa, I know you've made your decision about London, but if the doctor said that I can be discharged, will you let me go to school again? Just to finish this term?"

He stared at me for a good 5 seconds, blinked, and replied, "Well, it depends. You still have these burns --"

I cut him off, "The nurses taught us how to clean them and most of them are dry anyway."

Dad didn't answer. He just stared at me.

I spoke again, "I-I'm just wondering because... because Mr. Lee gave me work to do and I missed so many school days now, it might be hard to catch up. I have about 5 weeks left till the school year's over."

It took him a while to answer, but then he said, "Let's see what the doctor says, and go from there. Don't worry about school 'till you're fully recovered."

I just nodded in response. I then looked at my phone again and stared at Jin-oppa's messages.

 

I really want to stay in this school. _Yes,_ it was a shitty place. _Yes,_ I was bullied every day. _Yes_ , the teachers may have turned a blind eye about this. _Yes_ , I almost died while I was in its premises.

But it's not all bad.

The boys made everything worth... _bearable_ to say the least. I can't just walk away now, now that I still have a few weeks to spend with them. Yoongi-oppa may be right that transfering is what's best for me, but I figured that if this is really the case, I should make my remaining school days last then.

"Last question, if the doctor clears me today after his check-up. Will you even just consider letting me finish the term?" I asked my dad again, sending off my charms to him.

He sighed in defeat, "Yes. Your Mom and I need to talk first, but we will consider it."

I smiled and finally started typing my response.

 

 

 

 

_5 weeks. I have 5 weeks left to spend with my boys._

 

 

 

* * *

> A/N: So... this is some kind of a text AU huh? 2-3 chapters left and I'm done. Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu ♥♥


	12. Before Saying Goodbye

 

 

 

 

 

Hobi-Oppa didn't respond after that. I kinda panicked 'cause what if he got mad at me for going behind his back? I know he might get into trouble with his parents, but he was going on and on about this dance camp (a group of various choreographers get together every Summer to offer free dance classes to teenagers; they even recruit some of them to their dance crews and even have them audition to bigger talent management companies if they have real potential) and how he really, _REALLY,_ _**REAAAAALLLYYY**_ wanted to go but he's too scared to apply and so I did it for him. He has raw talent, and it hit me that maybe he just needed someone to push him a little harder in pursuing his passion and take some risks to achieve his dreams -- his OWN dreams, not the dream his mom and dad want for him. 

I love how his face lights up when he talks about the new dance routine that he's learned or that new dance video that his favorite choreographer uploaded on Youtube. Sometimes he would even teach Jimin some of the dance routines that he's just learned and they'd both get stuck in their own little dance bubble.

 

_He's been a source of my strength, my happy pill, and one of my cherished friends and I want him to be as happy as he is whenever he dances._

 

 

Few minutes past 2, my phone rang. It's Hobi-Oppa.

I gulped a few times before answering it, "Hello, Oppa?! Are you mad?! I'm sorry for auditioning for you and keeping it a secret --"

 

 

/Byun Seonsaeng confiscated my phone, Nica! That's why I couldn't reply to you.../

 

He didn't sound mad nor upset. He was giggly, as always.

 

/...It's afternoon break so I got it back./

 

I asked, "How did she know you were texting in class?! You were that obvious?!"

 

/Well, I always use my phone during class and this is the first time I've been caught. This is your fault, technically./

 

I bit my lip, "Oppa, I'm sorry, really. I didn't mean to --"

 

He cut me off, his voice animated in telling me what happened,

/It's because I screamed, Nica. I couldn't contain my emotions and so I went hysterical right in the middle of discussion! It's History class and obviously I wouldn't scream in excitement because of what our teacher was discussing and so she caught me./

 

I scowled, "I'm really sorry."

 

 

To my surprise, his voice got serious. Calm and sincere. 

/Stop saying sorry. I should say thank you, Nica. You know how badly I wanted to go that dance camp but I'm always scared to actually apply. I can't believe you got me in. Ah, jinjja... I'm so happy./

 

 

I stopped walking.

Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to mention one _tiny_ detail to you -- _I'm in school right now._

I got discharged last night, and so I decided to visit the school since my parents both came to work today (I'm still terrified of being alone, so I really needed to get out of the house).

I won't do anything risky or bad or dangerous, I promise. I just want to tell Hobi-Oppa the good news.

 

 

/I'm so happy that I could hug you, Nica! Ah... Jinjja!!!!/

 

I smiled, "Then why don't you hug me?"

/Don't worry, I'll come to your house with your Joonie-oppa after class so I can hug you!/

I smiled even wider, "No, do it now."

/Huh?!/

 

I'm at the juniors' building, and I can see Hobi-oppa's back right now. He's about 20 steps ahead of me.

I hung up and yelled, "Oppa!"

Hobi-oppa turned around and saw me. His eyes went wide. He looked around and blinked a few times, reassuring himself that I'm real.

He ran towards me then grabbed me by my wrist and we went to under a huge tree by the soccer field, "What are you doing here?!" He held my face, my neck  and my arms. He even made me turn around, "Are you okay? Do your brothers know that you're here?! Are your burns healed now?!"

I laughed and stopped him from body-checking me, "I'm okay. No, they don't know I'm here. I'll be careful, don't worry. I had planned on telling you about the dance camp in person but I got too excited that I decided to text you instead."

Tears fell almost instantly from Hobi-oppa's eyes but he's smiling from ear to ear. He hugged me tightly and even carried me and swirled me around, "Thank you, thank you, thank you, Nica!" He put me down and pinched my cheek, "You don't know how much this means to me."

"I do, actually. That's why I did it. I'm sorry for keeping it a secret to you, though. I just wanted to wait until you got in before I tell you. You make me happy and I want to make you happy and I know dancing makes you happy so..." I shrugged and gave him my sweetest smile.

He cried even more. He squatted in front of me and hid his face with his hands. 

I rustled his hair, "Oppa! Ya!"

Hobi-oppa sniffed and hugged my knees, "I can't believe I got into that dance camp. Jeongmal. This is the happiest day of my life. I kept on missing my chances because I'm too scared but you pushed me to chase after my dream -- my real dream. Thank you, Nica."

"This is why I wanted to tell you about it in person. I didn't want to miss seeing your reaction." I replied.

He stood up and wiped his tears, "Did you sneak out from home?"

I grimaced, "I kinda did, but don't worry I'll go home now. I just really wanted to see you. Say hi to the boys for me."

Before I walked away, Hobi-Oppa hugged me again, "Thank you, again. Nica. I'll be forever thankful for you."

I just smiled at him and we parted ways.

 

_It's the least I can do for you before I leave, Hobi-Oppa._

 

 

 

* * *

 

When I got home, I went straight to my room and continued on studying. My school plans are still pending because I just got discharged yesterday. My doctor said that I'm fit to return to school, but I should avoid stress and any kind of physical activities.

I've got an appointment with Ms. Bae next week and I guess until then my parents can't really decide if they'll allow me to finish this school term or not. If they do allow me, I still have 4 weeks left to spend with my boys. 

Mom said that we'll fly to London around beginning of Summer 'cause she wants to attend Yoongi-Oppa's graduation right before we leave. She will be working full-time in her work's 'international affairs department', and she also said it may take _years_ before they re-assign her again (Of course I don't really want to be away from my mom, but should I really have to come with her?) so it may take years before I go home too.

 

 _This is really depressing._ I just started a whole new chapter of my life  --- new school, new friends, new teachers -- and now I'm back to square one again. It's more unnerving as this time we're going to a place that I've never been to and live there _for years._

"Don't worry, my boss said we could go home for holidays if we could." My mom said. _Yeah, right. London is not just a train away, Mom._

My whole life is literally here. This whole London thing scares the heck out of me, as I don't think I'm mentally prepared for this huge change in my life. I barely made it with my school situation and I'm not even wholly recovered from it. How am I supposed to adapt to a completely different environment?

 

Whatever. It's a done deal. I can rant all I want, but nothing's going to change. I'm still going to London. I'm still leaving everything behind. All I can do for now is cherish every day I have left to spend with my dad, brothers, and friends. 

 

 

_I feel like I'm terminally ill or something._

 

* * *

 

When I got home, I went straight to my room and continued on studying. My school plans are still pending because I just got discharged yesterday. My doctor said that I'm fit to return to school, but I should avoid stress and any kind of physical activities.

I've got an appointment with Ms. Bae next week and I guess until then my parents can't really decide if they'll allow me to finish this school term or not. If they do allow me, I still have 4 weeks left to spend with my boys. 

Mom said that we'll fly to London around beginning of Summer 'cause she wants to attend Yoongi-Oppa's graduation right before we leave. She will be working full-time in her work's 'international affairs department', and she also said it may take _years_ before they re-assign her again (Of course I don't really want to be away from my mom, but should I really have to come with her?) so it may take years before I go home too.

 

 _This is really depressing._ I just started a whole new chapter of my life  --- new school, new friends, new teachers -- and now I'm back to square one again. It's more unnerving as this time we're going to a place that I've never been to and live there _for years._

"Don't worry, my boss said we could go home for holidays if we could." My mom said. _Yeah, right. London is not just a train away, Mom._

My whole life is literally here. This whole London thing scares the heck out of me, as I don't think I'm mentally prepared for this huge change in my life. I barely made it with my school situation and I'm not even wholly recovered from it. How am I supposed to adapt to a completely different environment?

 

Whatever. It's a done deal. I can rant all I want, but nothing's going to change. I'm still going to London. I'm still leaving everything behind. All I can do for now is cherish every day I have left to spend with my dad, brothers, and friends. 

 

 

_I feel like I'm terminally ill or something._

 

* * *

 

The next day, Mom gets to work at a later time to stay with me for a couple of hours. We had talked a bit last night that I can absolutely go back to school and finish the term, _if, and only if,_ Ms. Bae clears me for school.

My parents have contacted my teachers and they all have given me modules to study and some homework to do so I can somehow keep up with my academics. There are some things that I don't understand in these modules as I'm not physically learning at school, so I asked my brothers and TaeMinKook if they could tutor me. Namjoon-oppa promised to help me with Science and English and I've got Yoongi-Oppa to teach me with Math. Jimin offered to help me with our Arts and Crafts subject. Jungkook also told me that he can help me with anything, _except Math and English._ Taehyung, on the other hand, said the most he can do is buy me ice cream while I study.

I'm about halfway done with the take home exam given by Mr. Lee (It was an 80-item quiz, by the way). I still have a few modules to study and a bunch of assignments to work on, but I don't have the motivation to do them. It's past noon and it's so nice outside -- I don't want to waste the whole day studying. Plus, I still have a few days to finish this before I get back to school, _if my parents let me_. It's okay.

My brothers told me that we all get the half day off today for the Sports Festival. Every student participating will have to train in the afternoon, and I know Yoongi-Oppa's playing basketball for his class, Jimin's playing high-jump for our class, Taehyung's our representative for wrestling, and Jungkook's our star player for track and field.

 

_I want to watch them train._

 

I gathered my stuff, washed up and changed my clothes. I still have to persuade my mom to let me go outside, but I just don't care anymore. I just want to see the boys. Spend time with them while I still can.

When I went downstairs, she was knitting at the living room.

"Mom..." I said.

"No." She didn't even look at me, she's still focused on the fabric that she's knitting.

"I literally just said Mom." I replied. This will be harder than I thought it would be.

"You've been my daughter for 16 years, Nica. I know what every version of your 'Mom' means. That one that you just used on me is when you need to ask permission for something." she said, without even throwing a glance at me.

I sighed, "Mom, I just want to watch Yoongi-oppa play. He has basketball training today. Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook are playing, too. I just want to show them my support."

She didn't respond.

I walked closer to her, "I don't want to spend my remaining days sitting at home, Mom. I want to spend every single minute with my brothers and my friends. We're, _no_ , YOU are taking me to London for who knows how long. I just want to enjoy my time with friends while I can. Besides, you'll leave for work in an hour! I don't want to be alone here! Just let me go, please."

Finally, she stopped knitting and looked at me, "Fine, but you have to update me. Text me your location and who you're with. You need to be home before I do. AND one of the boys should take you home in case your brothers have something to do. Arraseo?"

I jumped on her and gave her a tight hug, "Yes, Mom. I'll be careful."  
  


 

* * *

 

 

I rushed to the library and went straight to the Literary section. I almost instantly found Jin-oppa ('cause seriously, who would miss his handsome face???) sitting with books and notes in front of him while Hobi-Oppa was beside him, making paper boats.

When he noticed me approaching, his eyes widened.

"Hi." I waved shyly.

"Nicaaaaaaaaaa." Hobi-Oppa tried so hard not to do his adorably cute sound effects as we are at the library. He stood up and pinched my cheek instead.

Jin-oppa held my hand and asked, "Are you feeling better? What are you doing here?"

"Did you sneak out again?" Hobi-oppa whispered.

I shook my head, "No, no. I got my mom's permission this time. I just missed you guys. I want to watch the boys train. Where's Rap Monster-oppa?"

Jin-oppa giggled then answered, while still holding my hand. _God, it's so soft and warm. I am seriously dying. Somebody call 119._ "He's not here. I don't know where he is actually."

Hobi-oppa then replied, "Oh, I think he was gonna go to the Han River and bike."

I furrowed my brows in wonder, "Bike?"

Jin-oppa let go of my hand, at last. _I think he could sense that I'm internally hyperventilating right now_ , "Oh, he must have a battle tonight then! That's what he does before his battle. He bikes by the Han River to clear his mind. He says it helps him in writing songs."

Hobi-oppa moved and offered me his seat, "Sit down for a bit. Jin-hyung's still finishing his homework. I don't really get why he wants to do it right after class."

Jin-oppa smirked and threw a crumpled paper at him, "I'm not like you, Hobi. I don't do my assignment 15 minutes before the class starts."

 

Hobi-oppa and I talked for a bit while Jin-oppa writes his homework. He joins our conversations from time to time, and even joined in when Hobi-oppa took selcas _("Change my picture on your phone! Ya, Jin-hyung, you sent Nica a selca last night so she could change your photo? Aish, this hyung.")_. We were at the hidden part of the library, farthest from the librarian's desk so we could still laugh and talk at our normal voices (although at one point, the librarian did glare at Hobi-oppa when he squealed while Jin-oppa was telling a dad joke).

Hobi-oppa has informed his parents about the dance camp and he told us this intense story of how he got into an argument with his dad because he wouldn't allow him to come, "I didn't back down this time 'cause I don't want Nica's efforts to go to waste. I love dancing and if my parents couldn't see that, there's nothing I can do. It's time that they know what I really want and I'm standing by it," he said proudly to us.

When Jin-oppa was finished with schoolwork, it was his turn. He shared that he's finding it hard to choose what career to pursue after high school. He even confessed how jealous he is of Hobi-oppa because the latter knows what he wants and is really dedicated to his passion and he can't help but feel frustrated because he is the exact opposite, "I'm graduating real soon, and I still don't know what I want to be in life. I just wish I had it all figured out like you, Hobi." The mood got a little down and so he just threw in a couple of dad jokes to lighten things up (and we got a "ssssshhhhh!!" from the librarian this time).

I love how easily these guys can share everything to me. I've known Jin-oppa half my life so he's really not a stranger to me, but this is the first time that I've actually had a real, serious talk with him.

 

I'm thankful to have bonded with Hobi and Jin-oppa. This is such a genuine moment for me because I don't remember hanging out with just the two of them, as my brothers and the 3 musketeers usually tag along.

We took a couple (maybe a hundred, Hobi-Oppa went crazy with the capture button) more pictures and headed to the gym to watch Yoongi-oppa's practice game.

 

When we reached the gym, the game was already in the 3rd quarter. Jin-oppa still managed to find us courtside seats because of his privileges (I forgot to mention again -- he's the Senior Class President). Once seated, I immediately looked for my eldest brother, who was then busily dribbling the ball. 

I held my chest, "I've never watched him play. I'm so excited."

 

Yoongi-oppa has an average height, but he looks shorter compared to the other players. He uses it to his advantage though, as he runs swiftly and aims for the rival's basket.

 

_"Yoongi, 3 points!"_

 

The crowd cheered. I stood up and yelled as loud as I could, "That's my brother! GO, OPPAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

Jin-oppa moved closer to me so he could whisper to my ear, "He's so good, right?"

I nodded. I blushed as he was so close. Goodness. _Calm down, heart._

 

As the game continues, Yoongi-oppa kept on making scores for his team. I find it funny how energetic and quick he is when it comes to basketball because he acts the other way around at home. 

I feel pride and joy while watching him play. I can't believe my sloth of a brother is actually a basketball MVP. Wow. _He really deserves the nickname Suga._

 

By the end of 4th quarter, their team won: 119-96

 

After the game, we went down to the court to congratulate Yoongi-oppa. I even brought a towel and water bottle for him.

He was surprised when he saw me coming, "Ya, why are you here?! Did you two sneak her out of the house? Aish --"

I wiped his face with the towel to shut him up, "Mom knows I'm here. By the way, you did good, _Suga._ "

He snatched the water bottle from my other hand and pinched my nose, "That's _Suga-oppa_ for you, Miss. Mom really allowed you to come here? Did you take your meds? Did you put ointment on your burns?"

I continued on wiping the sweat off of his forehead and neck, "Stop worrying too much about me. I'm fine. Yes, I drank my meds. Yes, I put ointment on my burns. Yes, Mom allowed me to come here."

Jin-oppa gave him a high-five, "Good game, Syub."

Hobi-oppa then added, "You think you're ready for the real thing?"

Yoongi-oppa smiled, "Not quite. We're going to practice again after an hour. Too bad I can't leave and join you guys. Can you take care of this brat for me?" He then rustled my hair and gave me a side hug, "Be good, okay? Where are you going now?"

I can't help but smile. I noticed that Yoongi-oppa is more affectionate towards me now since the fire, "I want to watch Joonie-oppa's rap battle, but I might visit TaeMinKook first and see if they could join us. Do you think we could pass the guards? Am I too cute to not be mistaken as an adult?" I made a disgustingly cute face on Yoongi-oppa that made him cringe and cover my face with his hands. Jin and Hobi-oppa laughed.

"Please don't do that again. I can't eat dinner now. My appetite is spoiled. Eck." Yoongi-oppa said, while pretending to barf.

Hobi-oppa checked his phone, "I just got a text from Taehyung. They're all finished with training. He said he's at the change room with Kookie and Chim right now. Do you wanna go? Joonie's battle starts in about..." he then checked his watch, "..4 hours. We have plenty of time. We could eat something and hang out then go."

Both Jin-oppa and I nodded in agreement. 

"We'll leave now. Oppa, fighting! By the way, I took a video of you playing. I'll send it to Mom and Dad." I said to my eldest brother while we were walking away.

He pouted, "You brat." He then waved and smiled, "Take care of her, please."

Jin-oppa put his arm around my shoulder, "We will."

 

_Oh my Goodness. This is too much._

Boy, I might go crazy if this continues. Ms. Bae will never clear me. She might even have me admitted.   
  


 

* * *

 

I decided to surprise Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook and so Jin and Hobi-oppa didn't come with me and waited by the school gate. They are still in the change room, and so I hid just behind the wall right beside the door to surprise them when they come out.

I could hear them talking as the walls are thin.

 

"Where did your abs come from, Jimin? Wow." That's Taehyung talking.

"Ya, don't touch my tummy! I'm ticklish!" Jimin replied, giggling.

"When did you start going to the gym?" That's Jungkook's voice.

Jimin answered, "I don't go to the gym. I just watch a couple of workout videos online and do them at home before I go to bed."

Taehyung asked him, "Are you still trying to impress Nica?"

 

_What now?_

 

"Well, no! Not really. No! We made a deal remember? I'm just doing this because I want to." Jimin said.

"That deal is stupid, I'm telling you. It made me a jerk to her. Don't you know how hard it is for me to ignore her everyday because of that stupid deal?!" said Jungkook.

 

_Deal?!_

 

"Jungkook-ssi, It's not my fault you've handled things differently. Our deal says, and I quote, 'Kim Taehyung, Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook can't make a move on Nica until Graduation Day. Reasons stated are: 1.) we are too young and immature and might just hurt her, even without intending it; 2.) it might make things weird; 3.) making things weird will result to the whole group being weird, and lastly, 4.) Yoongi-hyung and Namjoon-hyung will kill us if we make her cry' It didn't say to NOT speak to her and avoid her at all costs, you dummy. You can be nice to her without breaking the deal, you know. Just like what Jimin and I do." Taehyung replied.

 

I covered my mouth with my hands as I might say something, even if I'm completely speechless right now.

 

_They made a deal. For me. About me. On me._

 

Taehyung even had it memorized!

 

 

Jimin then spoke, "In my defense, I saw her first. So technically, I was the one who had a crush on her first."

I heard a snapping sound, "Ouch!" Jimin yelled. I think Taehyung hit him with his shirt or something, "Nica is not a thing that you can just call first dibs on, _pabo_."

"Honestly, I feel so bad treating her like that. She was going through so much and I felt like my actions just added to her pain. I just thought that avoiding her altogether will conceal my feelings or something. Ugh, how come you tricked me into signing that stupid deal!!!" Jungkook ranted.

 

Oh my God. I can't believe what I'm hearing right now.

So when Jungkook said that he has his _reasons_ for snobbing me -- that reason was their deal.

I --

He --

I can't --

What is --

 

Taehyung then explained, "Hey, calm down! We all did this to protect not just our friendship with her, but also our own friendship. Okay, say we all pursue her. All of us at the same time. What happens, _hypothetically,_ if she chose me instead of you two? What would happen then? It would just ruin everyhing -- our group, us 3, and our relationship with Nica. Besides, we all agree that if we still like her after Graduation, which is like, in 2 years, we could finally confess to her. Our feelings could change until then. Who knows, Jimin might end up liking that girl who keeps on leaving food in his locker?"

"No way!" Jimin reacted.

"Tae maybe a dork sometimes, but he has a point, Jiminie. Although, I don't think I'll ever find someone like Nica." Jungkook then said.

"I know. She's warm and funny and so easy to talk to. Despite everything that has happened to her, she remained strong and cheerful. I was so picky with people to trust and be close with, but she broke my barriers real quick." Taehyung added.

Jimin then spoke, "She has the kindest heart and the most beautiful smile."

 

Then silence.

My heart's just beating so fast right now. I am so overwhelmed and flattered and flushed and confused by everything that I have just heard.

 

"We could definitely make a Nica fanclub and just fanboy over him," Jimin joked. They all giggled.

 

Then I noticed the door knob turned.

"Surprise!" I shouted. I think my voice just cracked because I'm internally panicking.

Jimin jumped, "Omo, Nica?!!!!"

Taehyung's eyes widened, "You're here?!"

Jungkook looked like he just saw a ghost, "How long have you been standing there?"

 

 

I lied. _Of course I lied_ , "I just got here. Why?"

"Nothing. Nothing. Why are you here? Oh my Gosh! We missed you!" Jimin replied as he touched my cheek.

Taehyung held my hand, "Are you really feeling better now? What brings you here?"

Jungkook, as usual, just stared at me and smiled.

I cleared my throat, trying so hard not to blush as I recall the conversation that I just eavesdropped on, "I was planning on watching you train but obviously I missed it. I'm with Hobi and Jin-oppa actually. We just watched Yoongi-oppa's practice game. Do you have anything to do? We're gonna grab something to eat and head straight to Joonie-oppa's rap battle. Do you want to come?"

Jimin then said, "We're underage though. How are we gonna pass the security?"

I shrugged, "We'll cross the bridge when we get there. Are you coming or not?"

"I'm coming! I've always wanted to watch Rap Monster live!" Taehyung answered.

I turned to Jungkook, "Are you coming, Kookie?"

He smiled timidly and replied, "Y-yeah. Sure. Sounds cool."

Then I looked at Jimin, "Chim?"

"Well, if you're all coming, I want to come too." Jimin replied.

I smiled, "Great. Let's go then."

 

 

I took a deep breath and force myself to foget what I just heard. From what I understood, these 3 made a deal that I'm off limits till Grad Day. This deal, somehow, explains Kookie's snobbish / hot and cold actions towards me.

While I'm still flustered by the fact that they all, _what's the term??_ , admire me, I can't help but be glad, in a way, that they chose to prioritize their friendship over me. Taehyung's right; we are still young and immature and things are just gonna get weird if, hypothetically, I end up having a relationship with one of them.

 

Plus, I'm not even sure if I'm ready for a relationship! No, I'm definitley not ready.  _God, how does that even work?!_

Obviously, coming from an all-girls' school, I have zero experience with boys and romance and courtship and all that stuff. My only reference are books and dramas!

 

_And Jin-oppa._

Well, I can't even count him as a relationship 'cause he doesn't know I have a crush on him since forever (I don't plan on telling him anytime soon).

 

 

My head hurts.

 

* * *

 

"So... how are we gonna wing this thing?" Hobi-oppa blinked, shifting his gaze between us and the hamburger that he's eating. We're at Burger King right now, eating dinner (Taehyung picked the place, of course.).

"First of all, you..." Jin-oppa pointed at Tae, Chim and Kookie, "...can't wear uniforms there. That'll just blow off everything." He then checked his phone, "We have about 2 hours left before Joon-ah's battle. How about we all go to my house first and I can find you something to wear?"

"We're going to your house, Hyung?!" Taehyung's face glowed, his eyes twinkled.

"We can see your mansion, at last!" Jimin raised his hands in excitement.

Jin-oppa chuckled, "It's not really a mansion."

 

But Yoongi-oppa tells me that he _does_ live in a mansion. He and Namjoon-oppa have been there a million times, but they never let me go with them and I never asked them if I could come along as I don't want to spoil their "boy bonding time".

 

"Waaaah, their gate is bigger than our school gate. Omo. Seokjin-hyung, are you a prince?!" Taehyung's eyes grew wider as we all stare at the huge gate to Jin-oppa's house.

Jin-oppa went to the bricked wall where there was a button. He pressed it and said, "It's me. Please open the gate."

Jungkook's mouth dropped, "Omo, you can speak to your doorbell?!"

"I can tell how rich your family is just by looking at your gate, Hyung. Wow." Jimin said, while caressing the metal bars of the gate like he's holding an expensive figurine at a museum.

 

The gate opened and a 3-storey house with a fully landscaped garden came into our view. It was so beautiful that we hesitated to come in for a second. 

Jin-oppa chuckled, "Why are you just standing there? Let's go."

Hobi-oppa then replied, "I can't believe this. Your house is so big and pretty! Are you sure we could come in?"

 

When we got inside the house, our jaws dropped at how palace-like it is. I'm sure Jin-oppa can't help but laugh (and somehow feel embarrassed) at us. Taehyung kept on touching almost everything in sight -- the paintings, the antique furnitures, the walls, even the fur carpet -- while Jungkook just had his mouth open the whole time, taking in the beauty of the place. Jimin spotted the grand piano and played with it, and Hobi-oppa, on the other hand, asked Jin-oppa a dozen questions, like he was a tourist exploring a museum.

"You guys, we don't have much time. Let's go upstairs. We need to find clothes for you." Jin-oppa said. He then turned to me, "Nica, do you need anything? Water? Food?"

I shook my head and smiled, "I'm good, Oppa."

 

Jin-oppa's room is like a penthouse in a hotel. It's tidy and spaceous, the walls and even the furniture are either sky blue or white. He opened a door on the corner which is actually his walk-in closet that has, _and I'm not kidding_ , maybe more than a hundred pieces of clothing and pairs of shoes.

Hobi-oppa hit him on the arm, "I can't believe we spend so much time together and yet you failed to mention that you're rich!"

Jin-oppa answered, "It's because I don't think I am."

Taehyung's already browsing through Jin-oppa's necktie collection, "Wow, why do you need so many neckties?"

Jimin then asked, "Why are you studying in our school then if you're this rich? I'm sure your parents can afford sending you to that elite highschool 5 blocks from ours, right?"

Jin-oppa shrugged, "I like our school. Yoongi's there. You're there. Nica's there. It's the friends and the memories that I'm after."

 

Jin-oppa then told the boys to raid his closet and pick whatever they want to wear. He also gave me fake eyeglasses to wear to help me look older. After almost an hour of Jimin changing into a thousand outfits, Hobi-oppa browsing through Jin-oppa's shoes, Jin-oppa insisting that Jungkook should wear a pink polo shirt, and Jungkook telling Taehyung not to play with the light switch, we are ready to go.

 

I hope our disguise will convince the guards that we're adults. _Fingers crossed._

 

 

* * *

 

"Stop pushing me." Jin-oppa claimed. We are a few feet away from the entrance to the underground arena.

"You go first. Since you look the oldest." Jungkook said.

Jin-oppa glared at him and we giggled, "After everything I've done for you, Jungkook."

"Let's go! There are no seats so we need to be early." Hobi-oppa said, while pushing Jin-oppa again.

"Stop pushing me!" Jin-oppa yelled again.

 

I just love watching them bicker like this. I'm gonna miss laughing so hard like this. _I'm gonna miss them._

 

"Let's go, Nica." said Taehyung. I was lost in my thoughts that I didn't notice they were already walking in.

"Stay close." whispered Jin-oppa. Jungkook placed me in between Hobi-oppa and him. Hobi-oppa placed his arm over my shoulder.

Jin-oppa cleared his throat and spoke to one of the security personnel, "6 tickets please. Main."

All of us stopped breathing for a moment. Nobody dared to smile; all acted... older?? I don't even know how to act older. I just kept my head low and stared at the concrete.

"You're all here to watch Rap Monster?" the security asked.

Jin-oppa then replied, "Y-yes. He invited us actually."

"Your friend's really good. He's my favorite of them all." The security guy warmly tells us, while he hands out our tickets.

"Don't worry, I'll tell him that." Jin-oppa reached for his wallet and paid for the tickets. We all walked rather cautiously and once we're inside, away from the security entrance, we all sighed in relief.

"I thought I was gonna pass out. I wasn't breathing at all." Jimin said, holding his chest.

"Our disguise worked, thank God." Jin-oppa said.

Jungkook then replied, teasingly, "We are the only ones who dressed up though. You don't need to --" He didn't get the chance to finish his sentence as Jin-oppa kicked him in the butt, "OUCH!"

Hobi-oppa then cut them off as he run towards the arena, "Let's go! The arena's filling up. We might not see the stage upclose!" 

 

The arena has the same size of our school gymnasium. There's a big stage but there are no seats, so the audience would have to stand. No wonder Hobi-oppa wants us to be early.

There's quite a number of people already swarming at the front of the stage. Jin-oppa instructed us, "There's gonna be a lot of pushing in here as everyone wants to be as close to the stage as possible, so be careful. We need to stay close, okay? The show's about to start."

"Nica, do you see the stage?" Taehyung asked me.

"No, sorry, but it's okay. Can't help it if I'm short." I answered.

Jimin then pulled my arm so I'm in between them. Jin-oppa's in front of me, Hobi-Oppa and Taehyung are on my opposite sides, and Jimin and Jungkook are behind me.

Then, the lights were off and a spotlight was focused on the stage. A man, I think he's the host, showed up, "Are you ready to have some fun tonight? The show will start in 5 minutes!"

The crowd cheered and everyone suddenly started pushing to make their way to the stage.

"The people are going wild now." Jimin said.

Jungkook drew closer to me, both his hands on my hips. Chills went down on my spine. _Seriously, Jin-oppa and Jungkook should warn me before they touch me!_

People kept on pushing and pushing from different directions that I ended up squished on Jin-oppa's back. Hobi-oppa held Jimin and Jin-oppa's hands while Taehyung grabbed Jungkook's arm so we won't get separated.

Hobi-oppa then said, "This is too much. Why don't we go at the back? There's less people in there. Nica might get squished."

We then started to escape the mosh pit one by one -- Jimin grabbed Jungkook's hand who then grabbed my hand, and so I held Taehyung's hand and then he grasped Hobi-oppa's hand and Hobi-oppa held on Jin-oppa's hand.

"We're like Kindergartens holding hands while crossing the street." Jimin pointed out, giggling.

 

 

Then loud music started playing. The audience went wild once more. The boys can still see the stage from where we're at now, but I have to tiptoe because of my height. I don't mind though.

"I have goosebumps all over. This is so cool!" Taehyung yelled.

The host came out again, "This is it! The main event of the day! Put your hands together for our contenders, Ravi and RAP MONSTERRRR!!!!!!!"

 

 

Smoke filled the stage as 2 platforms rose: On the left appeared a red-haired boy with a long face and fierce eyes, Ravi. On the right was my genius of brother, wearing gold chains and sporting a mohawk, Rap Monster.

"He looks so cool. I want to cry right now." Jungkook whispered.

 

 

Ravi was the first one to showcase his talent. I don't know much about rap, but he's pretty good. He sure knows how to rhyme and his stage prescence is incredible.

 

BUT...

 

I don't know if this is my bias talking, but when it's my Joonie-oppa _\-- no --_ Rap Monster's turn. I was blown away. He delivered his lines with so much power and conviction and swag that I don't know if I should admire or be intimidated by him. 

Jin-oppa suddenly whispered to me, "Hop on my shoulders so you could see better." He scooted down, tapped his shoulder, and glanced at me.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Ppali. Before I change my mind." he replied.

I rode on his shoulders, and he held both of my legs for support and he lifted me up.Finally, I am able to see the stage now.

"Better?" Jin-oppa asked.

My cheeks turned red, I can feel it. Good thing he couldn't see my face, "Yes, thank you. You can put me down whenever you feel like your shoulders are hurting."

 

 

I was able to watch Namjoon-oppa spit fire onstage more properly now. Wow, I am so proud of him. He really is good. Just like Yoongi-oppa, he deserves his nickname.

He is, most definitely, a rap monster.

 

When Rap Monster's performance ended, the audience applauded and cheered. _I think it's obvious who the winner for tonight's battle is._

"We should have placed bets on Joonie. We could've earned money." Hobi-oppa said, shaking his head.

"Hyung, we barely made it to the entrance. How are we gonna place bets?" Jimin answered.

 

 

A few minutes passed, and the host came back with the results in his hand. Ravi and Namjoon-oppa stood on his sides, both nervous.

The host asked the crowd, "Who do you think the winner is?"

The audience screamed for both their names, "RAVI!!!!" "RAP MONSTER!!!!"

The host smiled widely, "And the winner for tonight's battle is..."

I screamed at the top of my lungs, "RAP MONSTER!!!"

Namjoon-oppa looked at the direction of the voice, and his eyes found me, sitting on Jin-oppa's shoulders, waving at him. He was shocked at first, but then he waved back and smiled, his dimples showing.

 

The host then announced, "That girl is right. Tonight's winner, the still undefeated champion, RAP MONSTER!"

Loud cheers filled the arena. I screamed so hard, I almost fell off of Jin-oppa's shoulders. I felt like I've won the lottery or something.

The host gave the mic to Namjoon-oppa, "Thank you everyone for your support. Also, thank you to Ravi for being such a good competition. You were great, Bro. Lastly, I dedicate tonight's win to my one and only sister, my angel, Nica." he then waved at once more.

 

Tears suddenly came running down my eyes. _I'm so proud of him._  
  


 

* * *

 

Namjoon-oppa wanted to treat us to a late dinner to celebrate his win. We went to a diner 2 blocks from the arena and Yoongi-oppa also came by after his basketball practice.

We all ordered our favorite milkshakes and some fries and nachos.

"Did you have fun today, Nica?" Jimin asked.

"I did, actually. This is one of the best days of my life actually. I get to spend time with Jin and Hobi-oppa, surprise you guys, visit Jin-oppa's house, watch Yoongi-oppa play ball, watch Namjoon-oppa's rap battle... today was a blast." I answered.

"You were so good, Hyung. Our mouths like dropped on the floor while you were rapping. _Jeongmal._ "  said Jungkook, his eyes wide. He even mimicked Namjoon-oppa rapping that had us all laughing on the floor (Jimin literally fell off his seat from laughing so hard).

"Stop it, Jungkook. My stomach hurts." Jin-oppa then said. His eyes are watery already.

Jungkook stopped his antics and laughter eventually died down, signalling Jimin to start a new topic, "Yoongi-hyung, do you have plans after graduation?"

Yoongi-oppa replied, "I might take a year off. I'm not sure yet. I'm helping my parents save up for my college fees."

Taehyung then asked, "But do you have a university in mind that you want to attend to?"

Yoongi-oppa nodded, "Yeah. Actually I might take Accountancy and be a banker. It doesn't involve physical labor, I work office hours, and I'm not that bad at Math. It's a practical course. I might compose songs and still join rap battles though, since that's what I really want."

Jungkook said, "Wow. You had it all planned already! I can't believe you and Jin-hyung are graduating already. Next year, Hobi-hyung and Namjoonie-hyung will be Seniors, and us 4 will be Sophomores! Time flies."

"Do you think we all stay in our section? Some students get re-shuffled to the other class. I don't like that." Jimin pouted.

"I wish I'd get Nica to be my seatmate next term." Taehyung then said.

 

I bit my lip. My brothers both looked at me.

 

"I just wish we all stay in the same class. Right, Nica?" said Jimin.

I didn't respond.

Yoongi-oppa answered for me, "You tell them, Nica. We're all here."

The boys all looked at me, eyes full of curiosity.

"Tell us what?" Hobi-oppa asked.

 

I let out a heavy sigh and closed my eyes.

 

Jimin tapped my arm, "Nica, what is it?"

I bit my lip and finally spoke, "I'm not gonna be in school next term. I'm moving to London with our Mom."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit long. Lol.  
> 2 more chapters and we're done! Thank you so much. ♥


	13. 화양연화

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG, I pushed through! This is the longest chapter in this story.
> 
> I'll try to finish this before the comeback. Thank you for all your love! ♥

That same night, we all went home without saying a word. Even Hobi-oppa, our  _ever-energetic-ultimate-source-of-happiness-and-unlimited-good-vibes-HobiHobi_ , was dead silent. Taehyung can't look me in the eye, from the moment I told them about London up until we separate ways. Jimin didn't utter a word either, _well,_ atleast to me. He asked Yoongi-oppa "why?" maybe about a million times and kept on whispering "I can't believe this." to himself. Jungkook... is Jungkook. I'm used to him not speaking to me that often so I wasn't that alarmed when he fell silent. I just noticed him biting his lower lip and punching almost anything (Taehyung's shoulder, the wall, the table, the air) the whole time. Jin-oppa was trapped in a trance; he switched his stares in between the ceiling and the floor. 

Our table was filled with horribly awkward silence until Namjoon-oppa decided to step up and told everyone to go home and just call it a day. I said goodbye to everyone when we got out of the diner, and only Jimin waved back (although he didn't look at me, he just waved his hand and turned his back).

While we were walking home, we discussed what had happened and my brothers straight up told me to give the boys space. Namjoon-oppa pointed out that they are obviously in shock, especially my 3 classmates, as they were all expecting me to come back to school for good -- not come back for a few weeks and vanish.

 

I feel really bad and it's not helping that I can't do anything about it as my parents have made up their minds. My mom actually bought our plane tickets the other day, so _it's a done deal._

 

 

When I wake up the next day, I went straight to Namjoon-oppa's room. His door wasn't locked, so I tiptoed my way inside his man cave. He's still asleep, as it was too early to get up and get ready for school. I barely had any sleep last night because of what happened, and honestly I feel like it will get harder to sleep soundly as days passed and my flight to London draws nearer and nearer (why am I even complaining; I've never had a complete, uninterrupted sleep in months).

Namjoon-oppa's sleeping soundly on his side, hugging his big Ryan plushy that Hobi-oppa got him for his birthday last year. I laid beside him and gently poked his back, "Oppa..." He didn't respond, so I poked him again, "Oppa... Wake up."

He groaned, "It's too early. My phone hasn't alarmed. What are you even doing here?!" He still has his back on me. He scratched his head and continued sleeping.

I sat up, crossed my knees and laid my head on his arm like he's my personal pillow, "Do you think they're mad at me, Oppa?"

He answered, although it sounded more of a grunt than an actual word, "No."

Namjoon-oppa sat up and so my head fell and landed on one of his knee. He rubbed his eyes and playfully covered my face with a part of his blanket, "Why are you bothering me?!!!"

I yelled, "Stop! I can't breathe!" He giggled and let me go at once. 

I sat up and asked him again, "They're not mad, right?"

He smacked my head with his Ryan plushy, "No, they are not mad at you. They're just... I don't know... surprised? Sad?"

I hit him back with the plushy, "Should I talk to them then?" I hit him again once more.

He grabbed Ryan and pinched my cheek, "And say what? You're still going to London. There's nothing else you can do or say at this point that will change that fact. It'll be fine, don't worry. When you go back to school on Monday, everything will be back to normal. They're just processing everything right now. We boys handle things differently when it comes to these things. Most boys, usually in our age, are not good with feelings and dealing with them. We need to reflect and think. So let this go for now."

I groaned and laid down again, "But I feel bad, Oppa! Why do I feel so bad? I'm literally sick to my stomach. I don't remember feeling this when I was about to transfer to your school."

Namjoon-oppa laid down beside me, his head close to mine, "One word: attachment. We are all so used to our group dynamics -- of spending so much time together in school and even outside the school -- that we all took it hard when we found out that you were leaving. We were literally dismembered, like Jenga pieces..." Then he shrugged, "...I guess we are just a tight bunch, aren't we?"

I pouted, "Well... for now. Actually, the thing that upsets me that most is knowing that this will all fade, you know? Like okay, they're upset and all that and I guess in a way, in a super selfish kind of way, I'm kinda happy that they're behaving like this because it just shows how important I am to them..." Then I buried my face on his bicep, "...but let's be honest, they'll eventually get used to me being gone. VMinKook will have other girls to get close with. Jin-oppa and Yoongi-oppa are going to college and they'll find new friends there. You and Hobi-oppa are gonna be Seniors next year and --"

Namjoon-oppa covered my mouth with his hand, "I'm gonna stop you right there." He turned over on his tummy, up in his elbows, "Stop overthinking, okay? Yes, things will definitely change when you leave. Jin and Yoongi-hyung are moving to a much bigger world, Hobi and I are gonna be Seniors, VMinKook will move up and we all might gain new friends next year, but it doesn't mean we'll get used to you not being around. I speak only for myself on this context though, I'm sure _I'm_ gonna miss you a lot when you leave."

 

I just smiled at Namjoon-oppa as I was touched by his words, but then Yoongi-oppa dived ON us out of nowhere and destroyed the moment; his whole upper torso landed on Namjoon-oppa while his butt, legs, and feet are on me.

I slapped his butt, "Ya, Oppa!!! We're having a heart-to-heart talk here! Why are you up so early?"

"Joon-ah! Aish!" Namjoon-oppa tickled his neck and so he stood up rather quickly, "I went to the bathroom and I heard you talking in here," he said. He pushed me so he could sit on Namjoon-oppa's bed, "What were you talking about?"

Namjoon-oppa sat up, and I used that opportunity to put my head on one of his thighs and place my feet on Yoongi-oppa's lap

 

( _Advantage of having 2 older brothers: you can use them as a bed. HE HE HE HE)._

 

Namjoon-oppa fills in Yoongi-oppa with our conversation, "Well, this anxious brat kept on asking if I think that the boys are mad at her. I've told her, atleast 106 times, that they are not."

Yoongi-oppa flicked my nose, "They are not mad at you, Nica. Stop being so upset and worried about everything. Do that when you're an adult."

I rolled my eyes, "But--"

Yoongi-oppa tickled my waist before I can even finish what I was saying, "Stop!"

I giggled. Namjoon-oppa joined in and started tickling my neck. I screamed and laughed and wiggled and rolled all over the bed, "STOP!!!! OPPAAAAA! EOMMAAAAA!!!! HELP!!!!" 

 

( _Disadvantage of having 2 older brothers: they could gang up on you and knock you out in a spontaneous tickle fight._ )

 

 

_I'm gonna miss these 2 bullies so much._

 

* * *

 

 

 

I don't want to sound paranoid nor assuming, but Taehyung NEVER texts me like this. Usually, he sends emojis on every text and sometimes he even calls me around this time (it's past 3pm now, so classes are dismissed). He never tells me he's busy.

_I feel like my heart is breaking into tiny pieces._

I think my brothers are right, maybe I should give the boys space. Maybe it's better this way. Maybe things will go back to normal if I leave them alone. I'll return to school on Monday and we could all just pretend that everything's okay. Maybe we could all just pretend that Jennie didn't transfer and almost ruined our lives. That I'm not leaving for London in the next few months. That it might take years before I get to see them all again. Or I might not see some of them _ever._

Life is supposed to be this way, right? I mean, we never really retain every single friend we've ever had in our lives. Chaeyoung and I were inseparable throughout elementary and middle school, like literally. We would hang out together even at weekends, and sometimes do sleepovers in each others' houses. We swore to each other that we will always stay in touch even if we had moved to different schools and she moves in a different city, but we broke that promise not even a month into high school.

I still think of her as my best friend and she'll always be, but we don't talk that much anymore, not as much as we used to (I think the last time we had spoken to each other was when she had visited me in the hospital.).

 

 _But you know what? I think that's okay._  I've come to realize that we can't expect anything to last forever. The people that come into our lives are pretty much like the seasons -- they come and go. Time passes by and we change -- we move to a different school, we change jobs, we get busy, we grow up, we fall out, we move on. That's just it.

 

So maybe, maybe I should just start detaching myself from them. It'll  be way easier for me to let go and move on to my new life in London if I'm free of all the things that's holding me back. It'll be way easier to adjust to the changes and move forward if I don't have any reason to look back. If I don't have anyone to miss.

I sat on my chair and stare at the nearly finished modules in front of me --- maybe I should get used to this. I should get used to the life without the boys. I should get used to just being by myself.

 _This is the best way to deal with this, Nica._ I need to put everything behind me once school's over. Start with a clean slate. Forget everything that happened in the past few months. Never look back.

As I convince myself, the boys' images flashed before my eyes, and suddenly everything that I had planned goes above my head -- Jimin's eye smiles, Taehyung's warm hugs, Jungkook's laugh when he disses me, Hobi-oppa's funny sound effects and heartwarming stories, Namjoon-oppa's wise advice and tickles every morning, Jin-oppa's bare existence that gives life to my heart, and Yoongi-oppa's overprotectiveness (which drive me crazy at times) -- how can I throw all of this away?

These boys became my whole world and I didn't even notice it gradually happening until it did. 

 

I am screwed. _So screwed._

 

 

* * *

 

I got tired of overthinking and so I decided to finish all my pending schoolwork as a way of distraction (Mind you, it was a bit effective). I was re-writing my answers when Namjoon-oppa shoots me a text.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I stopped texting him, hurriedly changed my clothes and left the house. I reached Burger King before the sun had set. Namjoon-oppa was already waiting for me by the entrance

"You don't have to defend your rap battle champion title tonight?" I said, as I gasp for breath from walking too fast.

He shook his head, "Are you okay? Did you drink your meds today? How are your burns?"

"I'm okay, Oppa. Some of my burns are starting to scar even though I always put ointment on them."  I shrugged.

Namjoon-oppa looked at his phone and texted somebody. Then he faced me, "Let's go? Where was that ice cream shop again?"

I started walking, "It's just a few blocks away from here. Near that clothing store that you love going to."

 

We started walking (we should've taken the bus though, we didn't realize how far it was) and I noticed that Namjoon-oppa kept on checking his phone for messages. He would ask me questions about my schoolwork or what I did today and tell me about his day as well, but his eyes are on his phone all the time. I tried to be nosy and see who's he texting, but he's good in hiding his cell before I even take a peak! _Err._

"Who are you texting? Rap Monster's got a girlfriend now?" I asked, trying to lowkey pry.

He snorted, "No. How am I gonna get a girlfriend? I'm so busy with academics and co-curricular activities and rap battles and it doesn't help that almost all of the girls in my class either swoon over Jin-hyung or _your_ three  muskeeteers..." then he glares at me, "...and stop calling me Rap Monster."

I can't help but to have a smug look on my face upon his reply, "If you don't have a girlfriend then maybe a... Boyfriend? Oppa, promise I won't judge --"

He pinched my cheeks, "Also no. I don't swing that way."

I pouted, "Then why do you keep on texting?!"

"I was just texting Yoongi-hyung, telling him that you are with me. He might call the police if he comes home and you're not there. You know how overreacting he is when it comes to you these days. He's a softy for you." He answered.

I chuckled, "Well, he told me that when Jimin had told you guys about the fire, you sobbed like a baby that he had to literally carry you to the hospital, so I guess you're a softy for me too?"

He made a face at me, admitting that he's defeated.

Just then, we finally reached the ice cream place. I quickly grab a table while Namjoon-oppa orders for us.

After ordering, he joined our table, "They said it's gonna be a while."

I looked around, "That's weird. It's not too busy here today."

"Uhm... I don't... I don't know. That's what they said. Maybe they ran out of milk?" Namjoon-oppa then sat across me and checked his phone... _again._

"Did they tell you how long it's going to be? I've got an appointment with Ms. Bae tomorrow, so I wanted to finish all my homework and modules today." I told him.

He glanced at the cashier, "Uhmmm... 15 minutes?" He checks his phone again, locks it then looks at me, "Anyway, are you excited to come back to school?"

"Well, not until after my appointment with Ms. Bae. She is the dealbreaker right?" I replied.

Namjoon-oppa nodded and changed the topic. He tells me about his day, and it turns out that it's been an eventful day for him and the boys -- Hobi-oppa aced their exams _for the first time in forever_  ("I think it's because you enrolled him to that dance camp this Summer. He's more motivated to study now. He finally got his groove."), Jin-oppa is a candidate for class valedictorian ( _Wow, how can I not admire this guy?_ ), Taehyung, _our Kim Taehyung_ , _who always complain about studying,_  made it to the principal's list of outstanding students in academics (I don't know if I should be more surprised or proud of this), Yoongi-oppa received a college scholarship for being one of our school's basketball varsity players (Mom and Dad will be so happy!!!), Jimin won as the Vice President of our school's Dance Club for the next school year (Hobi-oppa's the president, of course), and Jungkook bagged his 8th track and field gold medal today.

Then I asked him, "How about you? What happened to you today?"

He shrugged and smiled, "Not much, I guess."

 _Namjoon-oppa never, NEVER brags about his academic achievements to us. He's so intelligent and gifted, yet so humble._ I tapped his hand, "Wait, let me guess... you made it to the honor roll, too?"

He smiled again, showing his dimples, "Yeah..." then he scratched his head, "I'm also skipping all my final exams."

I furrowed my brows, "Why? Your GPA is high enough?" I covered my mouth with my hand,  "What is it?"

He looked down and whispered, "3.98."

I gasped, "3.98?! That's almost perfect! Oh my Goodness. Wow. Just wow. Oppa, I'm so proud of you!!!! Wow. I have a genius of a brother, I can't believe it."

He got so flustered that he ended up covering his face, "Ya, it's nothing. Don't make it a big deal."

I removed his hands on his face and tapped his chin, "It IS a big deal! I should've been the one who got you ice cream. You deserve a treat." 

 

I'm so proud of my boys' achievements, but I can't help but feel left out at the same time. There they are, excelling in their own ways, slowly creating their places in this world. _I wish I do, too._

 

Then our ice cream came, at last. Namjoon-oppa got us large sundaes -- he ordered my usual Triple Fudge and he got himself a Rocky Road Brownie. We talked some more while enjoying our treats.

Now Namjoon-oppa opens up about the new songs that he just listened to (he even downloaded some on my phone), how he finds inspiration in writing songs for his rap battles, and what his plans are for his Senior Year. He did almost all of the talking, and I can't help but realize how warm and educated he is as a person. _I'm just so lucky to be his sister._

I have a lot to learn from Namjoon-oppa. He's just 2 years older than me, but I feel like he's got twice the depth and maturity than I do. At times, he seems to be a man who has gone through this world at least twice, as he has such an endless amount of wisdom in him. It just amazes me.

 

As our conversation moves along, I finally told him more about this whole Jennie thing and how scared I am to go to London. After that, he texted for a bit again then finally asked me to come home. We left the shop around 8pm.

 

 

Upon reaching the house, there was a faint noise, more like music, coming from our backyard. I was scared for a minute because I don't remember leaving the radio on and I'm sure our parents aren't home yet, _so what the heck??_

"What is that? Is Yoongi-oppa home already?" I asked Namjoon-oppa as we walk towards the backyard.

He didn't answer me.

As we walk closer and closer to the backyard, the music gets louder and clearer. Someone's playing a guitar and someone is singing, _and I know who that voice belongs to_.

Chills went down to my spine. I faced Namjoon-oppa who was walking behind me, "Is that Jungkook? Jungkook's singing? At our backyard? At this time?"

He didn't answer me again. He just shrugged. _What is going on?!_

 

I opened the backyard only to find out the sweetest surprise ever.

 

Namjoon-oppa kissed me on the cheek and walk past me, "Surprise, Nica."

 

He joined Hobi-oppa, Jimin and Taehyung (who was softly singing too) in standing behind Jin-oppa who was sitting at the centre of our backyard, playing the guitar while Jungkook sings my favorite song on his other side. They were all wearing long sleeves and bowties, except Namjoon-oppa who was still wearing his school uniform.

I looked around, and I noticed that they had decorated our backyard. The garden beds surrounding it were illuminated with string lights and each bed has a heart balloon tied on it.

Yoongi-oppa then showed up, also in long sleeves and a teal bowtie, with a bouquet of roses that he handed to me.

"What is all this?! Why are you all here?!" I asked.

Jimin stopped singing and replied, "We just need to ask you one question."

The 5 of them, excluding Jin-oppa and Jungkook, who were still playing the guitar and singing respectively, picked up a 15x20in. illustration board and flipped them to me one by one:

Yoongi-oppa's board says, "WILL YOU"

Hobi-oppa's board read, "BE OUR"

Jimin's board says, "DATE" and it has a drawing of seven boys and one girl in it, which I'm assuming is us

Taehyung's board read, "TO THE"

Namjoon-oppa's board says, "SPRING DANCE"

Then Jin-oppa stopped playing and flipped his guitar, showing a question mark placed on the back of it.

Jungkook then stopped singing, cleared his throat, showed his sweetest and biggest smile to me, and said, "Nica, will you be our date to the spring dance?"

 

 

_This moment. This exact second. This right here._

This is the reason why I don't want to leave. Why I'm so attached. Why I don't want to just forget everything and start anew. Why home's always gonna hold me back.

Yes, I've come to realize that the people in our lives are just like the seasons -- they come and go. _But not these boys._

 

 

I don't want them to be like the seasons. I don't want to be like the seasons that just come and go, too.

 

 

_This moment. This exact second. This right here._

What I would give to stop time. To just stay in this moment for as long as I could. To feel this much love for as long as I want to. To have them all here with me for as long as I need.

 

 

I nodded, showed the sweetest and sincerest smile I have ever had in years, and finally answered, "Yes."

 

The boys all screamed and gave high fives to each other.

I walked towards them, wiping my tears away, "Who planned all this?!" I then faced Taehyung and punched him on the shoulder, "You were so cold to me 4 hours ago! Was that part of your scheme?! Who told you to ignore me?!"

Taehyung rubbed the part of his shoulder that I just hit and pointed at Jungkook, "Blame him. This is all his plan. He sent us a text this morning telling us to ignore you all day so you won't be suspicious. He was the one replying to your texts that time, not me!" He hit Jungkook's chest, "Tell her, Guk-ah!"

"You all told them to act like you?!" I raised my brows, pretending to be upset with Jungkook.

_I could hear Jimin whispering " Oooh, burn." and Hobi-oppa saying, "Maybe she'll all take us as dates except Kookie." in the background._

Jungkook's eyes grew big and I could tell that he's flustered as he was put on-the-spot, "Well, I-I just thought that the surprise would be more effective if... if we all don't speak to you." He scratched his head, "I'm sorry if --"

I smiled, "I'm just kidding. I was really worried that you're all mad but as it turned out you just wanted to surprise me. It definitely worked. I was really moved. Thank you." Then I pushed him, "But don't you ever give me the cold treatment again! I felt so bad I couldn't sleep!"

"I'm sorry, Nica." Jungkook said, as we exchanged sweet smiles to each other.

Jimin then pushed Jungkook out of the way, "Here we go again, Kookie's taking all the credit!!!! I was the one who thought about the balloons and I even drew that cute cartoon --"

I held Jimin's hand and he immediately stopped talking, "Thank you, Jimin. You worked so hard in giving me this surprise. I am so touched."

"I suddenly forgot why I'm mad. What was I saying again?" Jimin said, giggling.

Jin-oppa then said to me, "So... you're our date to the Spring Dance. You can't back out now."

I automatically blushed just looking at him, "Well, are you sure you all want to take me? Don't you have anyone else to ask?"

The boys looked at each other then they all switched their eyes at me and shook their heads.

Hobi-oppa then came to me and touched my chin, "I'm sorry for being upset last night, Nica. It's just... we didn't expect to hear that news from you. Sorry if you felt bad because of us."

Yoongi-oppa tries to lighten up the mood, "Now, now... enough with the drama. Nica's our date to the Spring Dance. Now, can we eat? I'm starving."

Jin-oppa then dissed him, "He's just changing the topic 'cause he was about to cry."

Yoongi-oppa gave him a dirty look while we all laughed.

Yoongi-oppa defends himself, "Ya, I'm really starving! We had a busy day. We went to the art store to buy those boards and markers, then we had to run by the department store to buy the balloons and lights then you and I had to pick up Nica's flowers then we had to decorate this whole thing as fast as we can because Joon-ah can't stall Nica forever..."

I looked at Namjoon-oppa, "Was that why you were on your phone the whole time?! You were updating them?!"

Namjoon-oppa nodded and smiled, "And I really told the cashier to delay our ice cream to buy the boys more time."

I looked at the boys' faces and said, "Thank you, really. I can't express how grateful and happy I am right now. I feel like I'm the most beautiful girl in the world. Thank you guys."

 

Hobi-oppa asked if we could take a picture as a memorabilia of this day, and so Yoongi-oppa set up the camera, and we all stood at the middle of our backyard, in front of the twinkly lights and heart balloons. I held my bouquet tight and positioned to the center.

Yoongi-oppa then said, as he pressed the capture button, "Ready? Try to act normal for this one, first." then the camera started counting, so he ran to Jimin's side as quickly as possible.

We all checked the camera to see how it looked like.

"Wow, look at that. So beautiful." Jin-oppa said.

"I know right? It's a perfect photo." Hobi-oppa added.

Jin-oppa then jokingly answered, "I was talking about my face, but okay."

All of us glowered at him at first and he just laughed, his signature laugh (the one that sounds like someone's wiping windows or something), which made us all burst in laughter as well.

"Let's do another photo! Let's make funny faces this time!" Taehyung then said.

"Go stand there again then." Yoongi-oppa told us to return to our places while he set the camera again.

The second photo was hilarious. We were all over the place: My mouth was hanging widely open as I was laughing out loud, Taehyung managed to hop onto Jungkook's back and both of them had the wackiest faces, Namjoon-oppa made an aegyo pose, Hobi-oppa pouted and did the peace sign while his bum was hanging like he was twerking, Jimin was almost on the grass, laughing, and Jin-oppa had a wacky face while was holding Yoongi-oppa cheeks, like he was forcing him to smile.

I had tears in my eyes upon seeing the photo.

"Ya, Nica, why are you crying all of a sudden?" Yoongi-oppa asked.

I shook my head and wiped my tears rather quickly, "Nothing, nothing. I'm just so happy right now. These are happy tears."

 

 

* * *

 

 

Okay, let's fast forward to our much-awaited event, the Spring Dance! Yes, I got cleared by Ms. Bae. We had an extensive (and emotional) discussion: she asked me basically about everything -- my emotions, fears, plans in life -- and I gathered that I shouldn't hide anything from her. She knows what she's doing and she wants to help me, and so I have to help her too. I told her all about our London plans (and why I'm strongly opposed to it), how I eventually got over my claustrophobia and monophobia (thank Goodness they are just temporary), and how I'm coping after the incident (she had this questionnaire that she used in asking me; she said it's for 'diagnostic' purposes. I don't exactly know what that means, but whatever.)

I also followed up with my doctor the day after. He checked my burns, and although some of them scarred, he was glad that most of them are completely healed. He also checked my respiration, making sure that my breathing isn't compromised anymore (he kept on telling me that if they had taken me to the hospital a minute later, I would have died of suffocation. _Yikes_.). After our appointment, he also cleared me for school.

 

My parents had no choice but to let me finish the school term. HA HA HA

My brothers also convinced my dad (he was the one who was against it... _grr_ ) to let me go to the Spring Dance. HA HA HA HA HA

 

The first day I got back, my classmates were all _mindful_ of me, especially the girls. They were all overly concerned about me ("Nica, do you need some help with your books?, "Here are my notes!", "Nica, don't move too much!") that I had to tell them off as I don't want any special treatment from anyone. _Gosh._

Speaking of the girls, they've completely turned over a new leaf. They are super nice to me now, and I can see how hard they try to make up for their past actions. They'd come to my desk and have small talks with me before class starts, and Irene even invited me to their lunch table. I'm glad that we're finally getting along, but it's just unfortunate that it happened right before I was leaving.

Also, I finished my modules, and I'm also caught up with all of my lessons!!!!! I had a couple of tutoring (and a lot of eating sessions too) from the boys, and bless them for helping me catch up with academics (again, I had to bribe them with food first). We spent almost every weekend at our house, doing "group studies".

 

 _So, yeah._ All is good. I guess.

 

 

 

 

 

Aaaggggghh, here's Jungkook again, making my heart race.

I think I know what he wants to tell me (maybe it's _that thing_ that I heard them saying at the change rooms?), but what if it's something else?

 

 

 

 

See you later, beautiful?

Did he just call me _beautiful?_

 

 

* * *

 

"You are so beautiful."

My mom's sitting on my bed right now, staring at me. I just finished putting on my ball gown (it was a red heart-shaped tube gown that we had picked out from the department store a week ago), and I'm all ready for the Spring Dance.

I swear her eyes are watery right now. _Oh my Goodness._ I can totally see where I got my emotional trait from, "I can't believe our baby is all grown-up now. You grew up so well, Nica."

"Mom, please don't cry. I'm gonna start crying too!" I said, and we both laughed. Just then, my brothers came inside my room, all prepped too.

Mom stood up and fixed Namjoon-oppa's tie, "I made such beautiful and smart children. I am so lucky." Then she went and fixed Yoongi-oppa's suit, "Take care of your sister, alright?"

"Yes, Mom." my brothers answered in chorus.

 

 

Our dad drove us to school because we cant' walk with our outfits, obviously. He reiterated his rules to us while he was driving (1.Take care of Nica, 2. Don't drink, 3. If you do drink, don't drink lots, 4. Have fun, 5. Go home before 2am).

"Do you want me to pick you up after?" Dad asked before he drove off.

Namjoon-oppa shook his head, "It's fine, Dad. Rest. I think Jin-hyung brought his car, we can have him drive us home."

Dad smiled, "Okay then. You have fun, but be responsible." then he drove off.

 

We went to the venue (aka the Gymnasium) with my arms entangled with each of my brother's arm. The school did a great job in transforming our usually sporty and sweaty gym into a fantasy-like events place. The three of us were so enthralled by the place that we had to stop walking to look around. There were flowers literally everywhere: on the ceiling, on the bleachers, doors, tables, the stage, and there's also a big centerpiece filled with maybe a hundred dozens of assorted flowers. Dim, twinkly lights hanging on the ceiling gave the place a romantic, dreamlike vibe, and I suddenly remember how the boys decorated our backyard with these kinds of lights.

The other boys arrived one by one, and we were complete by the time the event started. Loud, party music started blasted off the speakers and we were all on our feet dancing and laughing in the dance floor. We danced and danced and laughed and danced and danced until the music changed into a romantic ballad.

"What now?" Yoongi-oppa said.

"Now we take turns in dancing our date." Namjoon-oppa answered.

"Screw this, I'm dancing with you Jiminie." Hobi-oppa grabbed Jimin's arm and they playfully slow danced to the romantic music. We all burst out laughing.

Namjoon-oppa then faced me and offered his hand, "Me first! May I have this dance, Nica?"

I smiled at him and gave mine, "My pleasure."

The other boys sat down (I even heard Yoongi oppa saying, "I need a drink. I can't dance to slow songs. I need to be drunk first.") and took a rest for a bit.

 

We started dancing, and I kept help but giggling as Namjoon-oppa struggle _not_ to step on my gown or my foot.

"Sorry, I don't really dance. You know that." he said.

"It's fine, we're fine." I answered.

Then he started to get serious, "You take care of yourself in London, okay? It's a big world out there, but I know you can make it."

"Are we really saying our goodbyes right now?" I said.

"It's just... After today, we are all gonna be busy with Finals and everything. I might not get to tell you this before you leave." he looked into my eye, "I'm gonna miss you so much, Nica." Then Namjoon-oppa stopped swaying me and hugged me real tight as we continued dancing. I can feel the back of my head getting wet; I think he's crying.

Yoongi-oppa then tapped Namjoon-oppa's back, "Time's up. It's my turn. Grab a tissue and sit down."

Namjoon-oppa let me go and Yoongi-oppa switched to his place.

"You're really shorter than Joonie-oppa." I said to him jokingly.

He rolled his eyes at me, "Yeah, whatever." I chuckled.

He smiled _his_ smile, his gummy smile, "I'm having regrets siding with our parents about London. I think I'm changing my mind. I don't want you to leave, Nica."

I sighed, "Well, too late."

Then he said to me, "Should I just fail my finals so I can't graduate? If I don't graduate, maybe Mom will change her mind and stay until I do."

I hugged Yoongi-oppa, my chin on his shoulder, "Don't do that, you brat."

Yoongi-oppa kissed the side of my head, "Who's gonna pester me everyday now? Who's gonna wake me up at 3 in the morning just to kill a bug?"

"Get a girlfriend. She can do that for you." I replied. Yoongi-oppa chuckled.

Then Hobi-oppa came to us, jumping and wiggling like a kid, "My turn!!!!!"

Yoongi-oppa released me from his embrace and let Hobi-oppa take over.

Hobi-oppa twirled me around, "You're so pretty tonight, Nica."

I smiled widely at him, "Thank you, Oppa."

He then said, "Since it's just the two of us here, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for supporting me with my dream and helping me reach it. I'll always be grateful to you."

"I'm your biggest fan, Oppa. I'm happy that you're happy." I replied.

He then twirled me around some more, and even made me do fake ballroom (even if the music wasn't suiting, which made it even funnier) dancing. 

When we're done with our "dance", he hugged me and whispered to my ear, "Come back real soon, okay? Watch me perform. I'll save one of the front seats for you."

Then he let me go, as Jimin was approaching us. Jimin took both of my hands and placed them on his shoulder, his hands on my waist.

"Are you tired with all the dancing today?" he says to me, his eyes shaped like half moons again from smiling.

"Yes, but I don't mind. I like dancing with all of you." I answered.

"Your brothers got all teary after dancing with you, so I'll try not to cry." he said, making both of us giggle.

"I'm sure you're tired of hearing this already, but you look so beautiful. That red gown suits you. I should've worn a red tie." 

I touched his necktie, "Black looks good on you though."

We looked at each other and smiled, cherishing the moment.

He then pouted, "It seems like yesterday when I met you, and now you're leaving." 

"It's not like I'm gone for good. We can still talk, you know." I pinched his cheek.

"It's different. I'm so used to you just talking to you whenever I want. Like, literally, I don't even have to move. You're right there, beside me." He then let out a heavy sigh, "You're the best seatmate ever."

Then Jimin embraced me and we swayed to the slow, romantic music. _I'm gonna miss this boy so much._

"Agh, I need to go. I might cry any minute now." Jimin removed his arms around me and walked away.

Taehyung then stood up and took his turn in dancing with me. He's not saying a word though, staring at me while we dance.

"Why are you so quiet? Did you eat something bad? Are they out of strawberry juice?" I finally asked.

"Anya..." He shook his head,  "...I just think that it's partly my fault why you're leaving." He pulled me closer to him, my ear touching his cheek, "Jennie enrolled to our school because of me. She attacked you because of me."

I moved away and touched his cheeks, "Hey, don't say that. Stop blaming yourself for Jennie's actions. It's not your fault."

"I'm sorry." Taehyung said. _I've never seen him this serious and upset._

I hugged him, "Stop feeling so bad, TaeTae."

He hugged me back and said, "I'm gonna miss you so, so much. You leaving feels like someone banned me from eating strawberries, and you know how much I like strawberries."

"So... you like me as much as you like strawberries?" I asked.

He gave me a light squeeze and said, "Yes, I do."

Before our dance ended, he whispered, "I'll be waiting for you, Nica." 

Just then, Jin-oppa came to the dance floor. My heart started beating so fast. I placed my hands on his shoulder and he put his on my waist rather carefully. _I can't even look at him for the life of me, I think I'll faint._

He moved my chin with his fingers, telling me to look his way, "Hey, my eyes are in here." 

I finally gazed at her, and my cheeks automatically flushed, "Do I really have to stare at you?"

"Well, that what people who slow dance do, right? I don't know." he replied, chuckling.

I didn't reply; I just awkwardly kept on glancing at him.

He then complained, "Ya, I've been watching you dance, why did you get so shy when it comes to me?"

"I've always been like this when it comes to you." I said. _God, Nica. What are you saying? Stop right there._

He smirked.  _My Goodness, he freaking smirked!!!_ "Yes, and I kept on asking Yoongi why, and he kept on telling me that it's better if I ask you."

 

I'm leaving shortly. He's going to college. We're not gonna see each other for a while. I think it's safe to confess now. 

It's now or never.

Oh my God.

_My armpits are sweating._

 

 

I exhaled deeply and finally, _finally_ , confessed, "Well... uhm... For the longest time, I've had this... like... crush on you? I can't even remember when it started, but it's been a long time. So... you know... Yeah. That's why." 

Jin-oppa then smiled, "Really?" He then scratched his head. He must have been shy. _Aigoo , who wouldn't be?_

I nodded, "I figured it's better that I let this out of my chest once and for all. I don't expect anything from you, don't worry. It's just... you're my happy crush."

"Wow... I-I had no idea. Like, sure, I get it. I'm handsome and all, but --" I hit him on the shoulder and he stopped talking. We just laughed.

"In all fairness, I've always thought you're pretty." he said, and he let me go before I get to even react to that.

 

 

Oh my Goodness.

I think I'm camouflaging into my red dress right now. Like, I'm literally turning red. All of me. I can feel it.

I'm out of words once again.

_How dare him say something like that and just leave?!_

 

 

I was still flustered by Jin-oppa's words when Jungkook came up to me to dance.

"I guess I'm the last one." he said, as he positioned his hands on my waist.

I just nodded and smiled. We just danced for a bit; not saying anything to each other. My heart is still beating so fast, but it's different as compared to when Jin-oppa was dancing with me, as it flutters more than it beats. _I don't know why._

"Oh, uhm... You told me earlier to remind you that you were... you were gonna tell me something." I said, awkwardly.

His ears suddenly turned red, "Ah, yes... Uhm..."

I gripped onto his shoulders, anticipating what he's about to tell me.

He cleared his throat, "When you were waiting for us outside the change rooms, did you hear our conversation?"

 _I am gonna still lie? Aaagh_, "Uhmmm..."

He then said, "This maybe the one and only chance that I'll ever get. Who knows when you're coming back to London or when we'll ever see other again. This is basically breaching my brotherly oath with Jimin and Taehyung --"

I stopped him, "I heard you. I wasn't planning on eavesdropping 'cause I just wanted to surprise you, but I heard the whole thing."

He stood there, frozen.

I continued on, "And now I get why you've always acted that way. I agree with Tae and Chim, you could've handled it way differently, but maybe it was way easier for you to just avoid me. I completely understand why you needed to create that deal about me and I admire you guys for prioritizing our friendship. I also want to thank you for saving my life more than once. You might be a snob, but you're always there when I need you the most. Thank you."

He just blinked at me.

I pinched his cheek, "Ya, say something."

He pulled me closer to him and enveloped me into his arms, "As I have told you before, I'm really not good with words."

I was taken aback for a moment, but I hugged him right back, "It's okay. This hug tells me everything."

He then said, right into my ear, "I'll still go with our deal. I'll wait till Graduation. And maybe when that day comes, I'll finally have the courage to ask you out." 

 

 

Then the DJ changed it to party music again, and we let go of each other, too flustered to say another word. I don't know how to respond to his words, and it seems like he was embarrassed by what he had said.  _Why are we like this?_

We went back to our table and I sat down to rest and eat. After half an hour, we all went to the photobooth and took lots (maybe 50? _We went wild, man._ ) of photos. By the time we took our last photo, it was all blurry as Taehyung, Hobi-oppa and Jungkook ran amok and had us all laughing.

Yoongi-oppa let me drink one Jell-o shots and that's it. In contrary, they had VMinKook drink too much fruity-flavored gin that they were pretty much out of it when we left the party.

Jin-oppa, being the responsible eldest, didn't drink and drove us all home (in his silver SUV; he got his driver's license last month). He dropped us around 1:46am, which is still a few minutes spare our curfew. My brothers didn't even bother saying good night to me as they are both drunk so they went straight to their bedrooms (Yoongi-oppa didn't even make it to his bed; he slept on the floor).

I took a shower to wash my hair and remove my make-up. It took me a while to get off my gown, but I still managed ( _Am I independent or what?_ ). Before I went to bed, I grabbed my phone from my purse and I saw one of our photobooth pictures that I chose to keep.

I placed the photo on my study desk, beside our Spring Dance Proposal photo that I've printed. I stared at the 2 photos smiled to myself, remembering how happy I was in those moments.

 

 

 

And that was when I was finally ready to leave, knowing that I will carry those precious moments with me.

 

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, PLEASE, do leave comments if you love this story. I'm a sucker for comments (you should know that by now). Lol.
> 
> Also, I don't know which song Jungkook was supposed to be singing, do you want me to put a particular song or just leave it as is (Nica is the reader, so I wanted it to be as agreeable to everyone as possible).
> 
> Anyway, one more chapter! ♥


	14. Luckiest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. This is the last one.

 

_Luck._

I used to not believe in luck or chance or anything related to these things. When I was a kid, my parents would always buy lottery tickets, hoping to try their luck and win (they never won, obviously). Yoongi-oppa would also join raffles whenever we go to Hongdae, and I would always laugh at him and tell him that he's just wasting his time (he _did_ win once; he got a rice cooker. I laughed some more.)

Back then, I know, deep inside, that luck exists. _Of course it does. Why else do we wish others for "good luck"?_ People do make it big because of it -- win at lotteries, meet the person of their dreams by chance and end up together forever, have accidental breakthroughs in their careers  -- and sometimes luck can be seen even in the smallest of things, like getting a free coffee at work or finding money on the streets.

It's just that, I don't really care for it because I don't feel the need to _be_ lucky. I have a complete family, responsible parents, loving brothers, close friends, and a healthy body, independence; what else do I need?

I've got everything, and I guess that's luck itself.

 

Then, I became a teenager and transferred schools, and everything drastically changed. I was really fond of that idea at first; getting on a new school with girls AND boys (and having to see Jin-oppa everyday?? Score!!), new uniform, new environment, new world. I was so excited to take on a new life.

 

Little did I know, starting anew meant having luck on your side. _Lots of it._

 

I didn't realize it until then that our lives, _my life_ , consist of countless chances. Various combinations of options and choices and decisions that a simple alteration could either make or break everything, like how a small matchstick can burn a whole forest. Take for example, what if we had enough money and my parents could send me to Chaeyoung's expensive high school? I bet my life would be so much different. I wouldn't even know the boys' existence. Or what if we walked to school too early on our first day? Or too late? What if I chose to sit on a different desk? Maybe I wouldn't get meet Jimin first. Maybe I ended up being seatmates with Seulgi and even join their group since I am _so_ used to being with girls (Wow, that would have saved me a LOT of grief). What if Taehyung decided not to tag along Jimin that day; will I ever get close to him? Will he still let me call him Taehyung, not V? What if Jungkook came to school early that day as well? He may have ended up sitting at the front and befriended Taemin and his group. Or what if he didn't move to our city at all? Would I still be able to meet him?  What if Jin-oppa let his parents decide for him and agree to an exclusive school? What if Hobi-oppa's parents let him pursue his dancing ever since? Will he still end up being Namjoon-oppa's best friend who has no interest in dancing at all? Will I ever know him?

 

It's just shocks me that my life will be ridiculously different should atleast one, _just one_ , of these probabilities did happen.

If it did, am I happier? Or more miserable?

 

* * *

 

 

As planned, we flew to London two days after Yoongi and Jin-oppa's Graduation. My brothers didn't come to the airport to send us off; Namjoon-oppa insisted that he had some work to do (but it's vacation???) and Yoongi-oppa said that he'll be busy scouting for college dorms (but he JUST graduated???). _Obviously, they were just making excuses._ They admitted this to me days after we migrated.

The night before we left, Yoongi-oppa entered my room at 1 in the morning, eyes both closed as he was hugging a pillow, telling me to move over so he could lay beside me. 2 minutes later, Namjoon-oppa entered my room, with his Ryan plushy in his arms, and squeezed on my opposite side.

Their excuse this time was:

Yoongi-oppa's, "It's too cold in my room."

Namjoon-oppa's, "I think there are mosquitoes in my room."

 

They didn't talk to me; they literally just laid there and slept. I almost cried when I came to realize that that might be the first (in years) and last time that I'm able to snuggle with my brothers. My bed was a little bit cramped (and noisy from all the snoring ugh), but that was one of the warmest and best sleep I have ever had.

 

 

The first few months in London were the hardest. I had to adjust to the time difference, to the culture, the place, the food, the people, and most importantly, being away from my boys (including Dad, of course). Good thing they'd send me messages all the time and we'd always video chat once we could as it was Summer and they had lots of free time.

I had to take the train, or tube as they call it, to get to my new school. _I'm telling you, it wasn't easy._ She works all the time and so I had no choice but to commute to and from school every day. Sometimes, Mom has to work overtime and there were days that she'd go home late so I'd end up spending the whole day all by myself.

 

AND...

 

It didn't really help that I was basically an outcast when I started school. It's not like they isolated me; it's just that I got so traumatized with what happened previously that I'm having a hard time making friends now. I feel like everybody could just snap at me anytime, and I won't have anyone to back me up. I've learned to distance myself and put my guard up at all time to avoid getting bullied... again. I eventually gained 2 or 3 friends by the end of the term, although I wouldn't really call them friends. I think they're more of companions at school. Just classmates to talk with about homework or other school stuff. Or simply just having people to be with.

However, there were still days that I would just go home crying, desperately wanting to go back home so bad (Yoongi-oppa's wish came true) as I feel so out of place. Like I was this tiny, insignificant dot in an enormously unfamiliar world.

 

The time difference, _that freaking time difference_ , just made everything worse. 

 

 

 

 

The boys and I would always try to keep in touch, sometimes even staying up late, but it's just hard considering that we are all busy with school and other things. After a year in London, I got a part-time job at a cafe near my school to help Mom with our finances, and that took up most of my free time making it more difficult, even nearly impossible, to keep in touch.

 

 

Our communication gradually got worse. Talking and texting every single night became a weekly basis...

then it became a 2x-a-month-basis...

then monthly...

until it reached to a point that I get to talk to them (and vice versa) just on holidays and birthdays.

 

 

I didn't even realize it until it was too late. I was so busy adapting to my new life that I broke that one promise I made to myself before I left my old life -- to never, _ever_ lose in touch with the boys.

That no matter what happens, no matter how busy or preoccupied I become, I would always try to find time for them.

 

Now I don't even know how to say hi to my Oppa's. Jin-oppa's busy with college and we don't even talk anymore, unless he happens to be at our house when Yoongi-oppa calls; Hobi-oppa doesn't call me either and I had to drop his call the last time he did because I was late for class.

I still talk to my brothers on a regular basis, but I don't think they count. _They are my brothers._ It's their obligation to keep in touch.

 

On the other hand, my 3 muskeeters, however sucky I am with replying, still sends me messages whenever they can. _It's not the same anymore though._

 

 

 

 

SOMI huh. _There's a SOMI now._

 

Anyway, I am grateful that they still update me with whatever's going on with their lives right now but I can't help but feel sad that I'm not part of it anymore. I knew this was gonna happen -- I've told Namjoon-oppa about this before I left, and I was right. _I WAS RIGHT._

 

We could all try our hardest to stay the same, to keep in touch, but everything's still gonna change. They'll still forget about me. _I'll forget about them._

 

I could never blame the boys because, in all honesty, this is all my fault (to be fair, I would really want to blame my parents because I wouldn't be here in London if it wasn't for them).

 _I did this._ I was the first one to stop texting. I was the first one who would ignore their calls. I was the first one who would take ages to reply. I was the first one to forget. To move on. To change.

I was the first one to slowly sever my ties, but I didn't do it just because I want to; I did it because I have to. I had to leave my past behind to move forward and survive, as it was eating me alive. Looking back on my memories just brought me grief. It made me miserable, so much that I thought I was dying.

I had to find a way to stop the pain, and there was no other way. I buried the boys' memories at the back of my mind, and all the pain, sorrow and suffering that came along with them -- the bullies, Jennie, the fire, saying goodbye.

 

 Picking myself up and deciding to _slightly_ cut ties was the hardest decision I had to do in my entire life, but it let me breathe.  _It's like killing the only thing that has been making me alive so I can live._

 

* * *

 

"Nica, have you packed all your bags?" Mom was double-checking, _triple-checking,_ all the windows and doors to make sure they're locked and secured. She had gone by to the kitchen and checked the fridge and the stove and the oven and the microwave and the dishwasher and the coffee maker if they're all unplugged; she had put away her tea set (honestly, I know we live in London now but how did she get so addicted in drinking tea?); she had asked me maybe 16 times if I have my passport with me and if I checked our itinerary and if I tried to tidy up my room (I told her, YES, but really NO) and if I needed any books to bring with me for my homework (I'm graduating in June, who cares? Just kidding.)

She had booked a ticket back home for us 3 days ago to surprise my Dad and brothers. We'll get to spend Christmas together this year. _YAY!_

 

It's our first time going back home. I'm so ecstatic and nervous.

_I'm going to see our house again. I'm going to see sleep on my bed again. I'm going to see Holly again. I'm going to see Dad again. I'm going to see my brothers again. I'm going to see all my friends again. I'm going to see the boys again._

Well, I _might_ see the boys again.

 

Mom and I are supposed to stay until after New Year. I hope I get to see them before then. _All of them._

 

"Let's go, Nica!!!!" Mom's yelling at me from our front porch. She's on the way to our car to put her luggage in the trunk.

I closed our front door and hurriedly followed her, "Do you think they'll be surprised? What if they're not at home when we arrive?" I lifted my luggage and put it beside hers.

Mom closed the trunk and got on the driver's seat, "Appa said your brothers might not be at home tomorrow. I asked him last night without making it so obvious. He said they went on a trip with the other kids and that... what was her name again? Somi? Have you heard about her? Your brothers mentioned her once or twice over the last couple of months. I guess they've been hanging out with her."

I got on the passenger seat and put on my seat belt. I pursed my lips. _I really need to meet this Somi_ , "Yeah. Taehyung mentioned her. He said Somi likes him? I don't know."

"Just ask them when you guys meet. I'm sure they will be thrilled to see you again." Mom glanced at me before she started the engine and drove.

 

_I don't know, Mom. Haven't spoken to them for a while now._

 

 

While we were waiting to board our plane, Namjoon-oppa shoots me a text.

 

 

 

I showed his text, "Mom, they're in Jeju!" Who's taking their picture?! I bet it's Somi. _Agh. SOMI._

"Wow, they all looked matured and grown up now! They've all gotten handsome." Mom zoomed the picture in and scowled, "Aish, your Yoongi-oppa is still with his white hair phase. I've told him a million times to dye it back to black or even light blue. He looks like a grandfather in that hair. I hate it."

I giggled, "He looks happy though! Look at his gummy smile!"

Mom adjusted her glasses and took a closer look to the picture, "Omo, is that Jungkook? The one he has his arm on? He's... he grew up so well. He looked like a chicken when we left. Wow. Even Taehyungie and Jiminie and Hoseokie." She then zoomed the picture to Jin-oppa's face, "Look at that. He's handsome as ever. No wonder you had a crush on him for the longest time."

My jaw dropped, "Seriously? Did Yoongi-oppa tell you?!"

She shook her head and laughed, "No, you're just that obvious, sweetie. It's okay. I've been there."

I crossed my arms and pouted, "So everyone knew about this?!"

Mom gave my phone back and touched my chin, "I don't mind if you date one of these boys. I think they're good kids." Then she winked, "So you better work on it when we get home."

 

_Work on it?!_

_My mom's telling me to "work on it"?_

_What did London do to her?_

 

 

I grimaced, "Mom, did you hear what you just said?!"

She shrugged, "You're gonna be 18 real soon. What's wrong with falling in love? I just hope you get to choose the right person for you. Good thing you already have 5 boys to choose from."

Then I replied, in a dry tone, "I might not have a chance with any of them. They may have girlfriends already for all I know."

Mom faced me, "You would know if they do, right? You guys are so tight. Honestly, it amazes me how close you've become with these boys given that you studied in an all-girls school."

I scratched my head, "I don't... I don't talk to them anymore. Well, not as often as I used to. It was kinda expected, given that I'm here and they're there and we're busy with school and other things. So I really don't know anything about them anymore." Then I crossed my arms again, "Maybe that Somi girl knows everything now."

Mom touched my head as a sign of comfort but at the same time, teasing me, "Aigoo, my baby is jealous! That Somi took over your throne! Aigoo. Good thing we're going home. You can re-claim it."

Then I said, "Can I really, Mom? It's been... what? almost 2 years? The boys don't care about me anymore. They've moved on. They don't care about me as much now, and that's my fault. I did this. I distanced myself. It's too late now." 

 

Then our boarding counter opened and started letting passengers into the plane. Mom and I got up to gather our belongings to board as well.

While we wait in line, she looked at me and said, "Cheer up now. Yes, time and distance may have strained your friendship and it looks like they've got someone else to take your place now, but it doesn't mean you can't pick up from where you left off. They love you, Nica. True friendship can withstand everything."

Then she added, "And I bet you 1 million Korean Won, you're way prettier than that Somi girl."

 

 

* * *

 

My phone's dying. Damn it. _Why now?_ "Stay where you are, Oppa."

/Why? Do you want to videochat?/

"No, just... where are you again? Hotel?" God, I don't even know where I am. _How am I gonna find them?_

/No, we went outside to eat dinner./

"Where?"

/Taehyung's craving burgers yet again, so.../

"Burger place near your hotel?"

/Ne. Like 3 blocks away. Beside that Korean BBQ place. Why am I explaining this to you, it's not like --/

I giggled. Namjoon-oppa sure is quick to catch up when it comes to these things.

 

My parents let me go to Jeju right after we landed. I'm tired and jetlag is taking over me, but I really want to see the boys right now and apologize to them for being a sucky friend these past couple of months.

I just got off KTX and I'm in a cab right now, figuring out how to get to them.

 

 

I could hear Hobi-oppa talking,

/What? What is it? Why do yo++u like you've seen a ghost?/

Then Jin-oppa's voice,

/Are you talking to Nica, Joonie?/

/She's asking me where we are. Like, directions and everything./

 

Then I heard screeching.

By the sound of it, Jungkook grabbed the phone, /Hello? Nica?/

I smiled. It's been a while since I've heard his voice, and surprisingly, it still tickles my chest, "Hi Kookie."

Then Jimin talked,

/Hi Nica! We're in Jeju right now! I wish you were here!!!!/

Then Taehyung,

/We miss you so much. It's been too long! Please come home./

 

I heard more screeching and muffled noises. Are they fighting over who gets to hold the phone? _Seriously._

Yoongi-oppa then spoke,

/Nica, are you here?! Like here?! You're not in London?!/

 

Then before I even get to reply, the call got disconnected.

MY PHONE DIED.

 

GDDMNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAGHHHHHH!!!

 

My taxi driver cleared his throat, "Have you figured out where we're going?" 

I scratched my head, "Uhm..." I forgot to ask which hotel they were staying!!! I got too excited!!! "...I actually forgot the name of the hotel, Oppa-nim. Can you bring me to the hotel near the beach?"

He chuckled, "You need to be more specific, Miss. I know atleast 7."

Aigoo. What am I gonna do now? Knowing the boys, they'd probably go to the cheapest one. "Uhmm, the most affordable one? I'm trying to look for my classmates."

He smirked and started driving, "Okay then. I hope we go to the right hotel."

 

So we drove for a good 15 minutes and he dropped me off to a small inn near the beach. I really don't think this is the right place (though I don't know what IS the right place), but I still went inside and asked the reception if the boys are checked in. _She said no._

 

I have nowhere to go, I'm jet lagged, and my phone's dead so...

_Basically, I'm screwed._

 

 

I started walking, a big duffel bag in my hand. I am so tired from the long flight and my tummy's been rumbling since I got on the KTX.

I walked for 2 blocks, and I saw a convenience store. _YES!_

 

I practically ran and got inside. I quickly went to the junk food aisle and got a large instant ramyun and a chocolate bar. I paid for them and went to where the hot water is to have the ramyun cooked.

_Goodness, how am I supposed to find the boys?_

 

"Taehyungie, I swear to God, if that strawberry milk that you're looking for is not here, I'm gonna pound on you a little bit."

"Well, it's not like you can reach me."

"You piece of --"

"Stop bickering! Seriously, why did I agree to tag along with you?! I feel like I'm a babysitter."

"You said there are so many mosquitoes outside and they might bite your face."

 

OH MY GOD.

Those voices. OH MY GOD.

I wander my eyes and looked in the direction of the voices.

 

"Are they selling vodka here too?"

"I think so. Do you want to buy? Do we still have orange juice in the hotel? Your mix is quite good, Jimin."

 

 

OH MY GOD. It's them. I cannot believe this.

I absentmindedly left my ramyun, followed the voices and went to the aisles.

 

 

"This is the fourth convenience store that we went to, Tae. If you insist on going to another one you would have to piggyback me."

"That's not a problem, Jin-hyung."

 

I can see Taehyung's head peeking on Aisle 6. I walked as fast as I could and went there.

 

It's like they have seen a ghost upon seeing my face.

My eyes got teary.

Jimin ran into me, and lifted me to a hug. I dropped by duffel bag, "Nicaaaaaaaaaa, what are you doing here?!"

He let me go, so it was Taehyung's turn to hug me tightly. He's gotten a lot taller and broader, "Nica, I missed you."

"You cheeky girl." Jin-oppa pinched my cheek and hugged me as well. He has brown hair now and... muscles. _Wow._ He's wearing a sleeveless shirt so I can see them.

Taehyung then punched Jimin on the shoulder, "See? Good thing we came here! I might not get my strawberry milk, but atleast we found Nica!"

Jimin rolled his eyes at him, then turned to me with the sweetest smile, "Have you eaten? You look so tired. Did you come here straight from the airport?"

I nodded, "Yes."

Jin-oppa put his arm around me, "Aigoo. Come, the others are waiting outside. Taehyung-ah, get her duffel."

 

I didn't even bother getting my ramyun. I'm just so happy that I saw them here.

_And that they're not mad at me for cutting them off._

 

When we went outside, Jin-oppa and Taehyung hid me on their backs. I covered my mouth so I wouldn't giggle.

Hobi-oppa asked Taehyung, "Do they sell duffel bags here? Did you buy so many strawberry milk that they had to put it in a pink duffel bag?!"

Taehyung didn't answer, he just chuckled.

"Oh!" Jungkook exclaimed, "Who are you hiding in there? Why do you have a pair of legs behind you?!"

Then I popped my head in between Jin-oppa and Taehyung's side and yelled, "Surprise!"

 

_There was silence._

Yoongi-oppa, Namjoon-oppa, Hobi-oppa, and Jungkook were literally just staring at me. Not moving a muscle.

Jimin then said, "Ya, you guys. She's real. Nica's back!"

 

That's when reality smacked them and they all came running to me, hugging me.

 

"AaaaaAAiiiGOOOOO!!!!!"

"NICAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!"

"Why are you here????"

"You've gotten taller!!!!"

"Your hair is so long!!!"

 

Hugs after hugs after hugs after hugs. Laughter upon laughter upon laughter. Unlimited exchanges of pure smiles and looks of fondness. They even made a circle around me and jumped, like I was some kind of an offer or something.

I may be physically tired, but I don't really mind as my mind is so full right now.

 

 

I am _indeed_ home. 

 

* * *

 

"Do you want more samgyupsal?" Jin-oppa offered me his freshly grilled pork belly. We are at our hotel room's porch right now.

I took another sip of coffee, "No, Oppa. I'm good. I've eaten so much I think I'm about to explode."

He then shoved the piece of samgyup to Hobi-oppa's mouth, who gladly ate it.

Jimin then asked me, "Nica, what were you doing in that convenience store earlier?"

"Oh, I was about to go to where you were eating, but our call got disconnected. I forgot the name of your hotel and honestly I don't even remember asking Joon-oppa so I just told the taxi driver to drop me off to the nearest, cheapest hotel. You're not checked in there and so I walked and I found this convenience store to eat."

"What a coincidence! Wow. Taehyungie here was looking for this specific brand of Strawberry milk, and so after our phone call we all left the place and look for it. We went to 3 different convenience stores before that. What are the odds that we'll find you on the 4th one?" Jimin tells me as he drank his beer.

 

 

_Luck._

Yes, I do believe in luck now. _What else could explain that?_ I was about to lose it earlier, but, in some favorable force of Universe, I found them!

 

 

I then said, "I am so sorry. For cutting you off. I haven't been responding to you guys since last year."

All their smiles evaporized, eyes on me.

I continued, "I just... I got so busy, and you're busy too..." I swallowed and tried not to cry. _No, I can't._ I'm not a crybaby anymore, "...and Taehyung keep on telling me about this Somi, and I figured that she might have taken my place, and you've coped with my absence so there's no need to be clingy and just let you enjoy your life here and I had to adjust to my life there and it was hard so I needed to distance myself from you guys and stay strong --"

Yoongi-oppa shoved a huge piece of ssam in my mouth to stop me from talking, "Nica I love you but you need to shut up for now and let us talk."

I blinked, wide-eyed, as I stare at them while chewing this huge chunk of ssam.

Yoongi-oppa then said, "We know. I know you had to do everything to adjust to your life there, even if it means leaving your life behind here. I've been telling these kids and Jin- _hyung_  on our monthly boys' night out to give you space as you need to figure out your new life now and we may make it harder for you if we kept on bothering you."

The boys nodded.

I had to ask him, _of course out of all the things he just said, that's the one thing I paid attention to_ ,  "You have a monthly boys' night out?"

The boys nodded again.

Namjoon-oppa then added, "But it doesn't mean that we don't love or care for just as much. Yes, we all got hurt when you stopped talking to us, but then we eventually understood why you had to do it. Besides, even we don't talk to each other that often 'cause that's just how life is. That's fine."

Then Jungkook said, "And with Somi... Yes, she is a cool girl. We hang out with her all the time and even the hyung's like her too, but she can never replace you, Nica."

Jimin and Taehyung nodded their heads simultaneously.

Jin-oppa said, looking smug, "Our Nica is jealous! Aigoo... you're jealous of Somi!"

I swallowed the ssam and said, "No, I am not!"

Hobi-oppa then stood up and tapped my cheek, "Nica is jealous!"

Taehyung said, "No one can replace you, Nica. You should know that by now."

"Here, eat more ssam until you realize that you're worried over nothing." Yoongi-oppa shoved yet another ssam into my mouth as the other boys laughed.

 

I can't speak, so I just looked at them talking to each other.

Jimin hit Jungkook on the neck, "Jeon Jungkook, why do you keep on stealing my food?!"

Jungkook snickered, "You weren't eating it!"

"I want to drink Strawberry milk." Taehyung pouted.

Namjoon-oppa groaned at him, "It's 1 in the morning, Taehyung-ah. Can we sleep for now and just look for it tomorrow?"

Hobi-oppa danced all of a sudden, "Nica is here! Nica is here!"

Yoongi-oppa sighed, massaging his temples, "Seokjin, I told you not to give him soju, right?! We all know Hobi gets drunk by drinking even a drop of alcohol."

Jin-oppa chuckled, "What?! It's fun. Look, he's having fun! AND call me Hyung!!!"

Yoongi-oppa replied, "It's not gonna be fun when it's 5am and he's crying in the bathroom, puking. AND I'll call you Hyung again when you act like one."

Jimin joined Hobi-oppa and they danced and jumped like 2 toddlers on sugar high.

 

_As I wander my eyes, staring at these 7 loving, however dorky, boys in front of me that's when it finally hit me._

 

Taehyung grabbed my hand and I stood up, "Nica, let's go take a picture! Yoongi-hyung is setting the camera right now."

 

_Yes, I've had a thousand hardships and I'm sure I'm gonna face a thousand more..._

 

I stood beside Jungkook. He smiled at me, placed his arm on my waist and squeezed it lightly, "I'm really glad you're here."

 

 

_...but right now , right in this moment, right where these boys are, right where I feel loved, I can still say that I am the luckiest girl._

 

* * *

 

**EPILOGUE**

 

"I got this, Nica. You should sleep."

I'm washing dishes with Jungkook right now. We were the only ones who were willing to do it anyway.

I shook my head, "No, I'm good. We're about to finish anyway."

He then said, "You know, Somi loves washing the dishes. I really don't get why."

I didn't reply.

He nudged me, "Are you really jealous of her?!"

Of course I'd deny it, "No, I'm not. It's just that... I don't know. You are all crazy about her."

He smiled, "That's not true. I'm crazy about you."

 

Then we stared as each other as awkward silence fills the room.

 

He spoke again, "I know what you feel though. That's how I feel when you talk to Jin-hyung or Jimin or Taehyung. I know it's a bit childish, but I don't like it when they're too close to you. Remember when we went to your house and had a group study? I saw how happy you were while helping Jin-hyung cook, so I insisted in helping too. I just felt bad that I was a bit douchy to you. It's just that I was jealous..."

 

_I don't know what to say. Jungkook has never been this honest with me._

 

"...and it doesn't help that you have a crush on him, and he has a crush on you." he said then pouted.

 _Oh, God._ "You knew I had a crush on Jin-oppa?! AM I REALLY THAT OBVIOUS?!!!!! AND JIN-OPPA HAD A CRUSH ON ME?! YOU'RE KIDDING RIGHT."

He shook his head, washing the last fork in the sink, "He confessed on our last drinking game. He said he didn't try to pursue you 'cause you were young and Yoongi-hyung might kill him."

 

_I didn't say a thing again. What am I suppose to say?_

 

"And to top it all, Jimin, Taehyung and I had a deal." Jungkook groaned, "That I'm not supposed to say to you."

I giggled, "That day, when you were in the changing room and I surprised you, I actually overheard your conversation. Like all of it."

Jungkook's doe eyes got wider than ever, "No, you did not."

"Sorry, I wasn't planning to." I replied.

He shrugged, "Well, atleast you know now."

Then I said, rather awkwardly, "Is it even still on? Like I moved to London nearly two years ago. I'm sure you all have girls you like now... Somi?"

Jungkook snorted. Then he looked at me and said, "I still like you, Nica."

 

I swallowed a hard lump in my throat.

 

He tapped my nose with his index finger, "And I don't care if Jin-hyung or Jimin or Taehyung still like you or not. What matters is, I still do. I like you a lot."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, for the nth time, thank you so much for reading this! I had fun writing this fanfic so I am glad that you all liked it.
> 
> PS: I'll let you decide who's gonna win over Nica. Or if she even picks one of them. :P


	15. Author's Note

I felt like I needed to have some final words before I officially close this fan fiction, so here it goes!

 

STORY TIME! This fic was supposed to be a Taehyung x Nica x Jungkook love triangle, but it turns out to be about friendship and the struggles that high school students mostly experience, especially with bullying and stuff. I did not want any member to be left out so I tried to incorporate them in every chapter, and I'm not really regretting that I changed the whole plot and just focused on the group as a whole, instead of making it a love story and sleeping on the other members.

I'm gonna miss narrating as Nica :( I really like her character, and I felt like teenagers can really relate to her, with regards to struggling with adjustments and bullying and crushes and everything under the teenage sun. I also liked that each member has a unique relationship with her.

I've decided to leave it open-ended because, like I said, this story wasn't really a love story. Obviously, her choice would either be Jin or Jungkook, but I leave it to you guys. 

 

Thank you so much for your comments. They keep me going.

 

PS: I'm coming up with a new fan fic, so please watch out for it.

 

LOVE YOU!

**Author's Note:**

> PS: Come talk to me on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/_saranghaejjk)  ;)


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